487
🍆 🔫 Rule (sh.itjust.works)
submitted 5 months ago by can@sh.itjust.works to c/196@lemmy.blahaj.zone
top 19 comments
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[-] casmael@lemm.ee 109 points 5 months ago

I once got frisked at the o2 centre in London going into a comedy show and the security guard straight up grabbed my penis. We made eye contact like yup, that’s a penis

[-] JadenSmith@sh.itjust.works 115 points 5 months ago

Haha the same thing happened to me, at Chicago O'Hare airport.

Before they searched me the man said I had a "suspicious package" in my "groin area". I'll never forget the man's face as he grabbed a handful of dick. Eye contact as well, it was so romantic (probably not for him, but I still had a semi so...)

[-] wreckedcarzz@lemmy.world 57 points 5 months ago

Lmfao the parenthesized text makes this absolute gold

[-] tektite@slrpnk.net 6 points 4 months ago

"...and when you're a TSA Agent, they let you do it. You can do anything. Grab em by the dick! You can do anything."

[-] wreckedcarzz@lemmy.world 48 points 5 months ago

"so are you going to finish what you started?"

[-] JusticeForPorygon@lemmy.world 43 points 5 months ago

"GET YOUR HANDS OFF MY PENIS"

[-] veroxii@aussie.zone 30 points 5 months ago

"What is the charge? Eating a meal? A succulent Chinese meal?"

[-] JusticeForPorygon@lemmy.world 21 points 5 months ago

"Ladies and gentlemen, this is democracy manifest!"

[-] i_am_hiding@aussie.zone 7 points 5 months ago

"That's a nice headlock, sir! I see that you know your judo well!"

[-] DickFiasco@lemm.ee 6 points 5 months ago

And you sir, are you waiting to receive my limp penis?

[-] Jakdracula@lemmy.world 79 points 5 months ago
[-] can@sh.itjust.works 43 points 5 months ago

It's a good thing I posted it here

[-] Johanno@feddit.de 6 points 5 months ago

Soda can? erection? Same thing!

[-] jaspersgroove@lemm.ee 51 points 5 months ago

He wouldn’t have caught such a beating if the erection hadn’t gotten even larger during the beating.

[-] wreckedcarzz@lemmy.world 34 points 5 months ago

"stop resisti- wait wtf STOP ENJOYING IT"

[-] festnt@sh.itjust.works 22 points 5 months ago

THE PISTOL IS GETTING BIGGER, HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE?!

[-] Omgarm@lemmy.world 22 points 5 months ago

God gave you the boner that got your ass beat.

[-] h3mlocke@lemm.ee 4 points 4 months ago

Nah, that was Waluigi

this post was submitted on 24 May 2024
487 points (100.0% liked)

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