That's it. That's the actual headline. Nothing I say can make it more absurd than it actually is.
The war-game participants include representatives from investment banks, in addition to current and former executives from pharmaceutical companies and retired four-star US military officers. The committee declined to name the financial executives who will participate.
The bipartisan delegation
Capitalist Party of America prepares for battle with the Communist Party of China.
That's ultimately what this is right? It's the state wrangling its disparate bourgeoisie and attempting to steer them into a unified force of capitalism.
My read is that the MIC capitalists are very on board with war against China (or at least ratcheting up tensions) but the Industrial and Finance Capitalists are not. This might be an attempt to get the latter groups on board.
“As the committee has learned, when you scrutinise and follow the billions of US investor dollars flowing to CCP-controlled Chinese enterprises, courtesy of reckless Wall Street firms, it leads to nowhere good in many instances,” he said.
That's just the free market doing what it does! What are you? A bunch of commies? A bunch of commies trying to interfere with the invisible hand? Do you hate freedom?!? 
Dictatorship of bourgeoisie on full display.
So, it looks like they're trying to scare these folks out of investing in China? The wargame will probably have the same rigor as the Millennium Challenge.
"In three years we gonna do a phyrric military loss here but which will ensure we retain our colonies properly chained with full fascism, so you better not have any phisical capital in these parts by that moment"
: "Pweeese invest more in Rwaytheon."
I mean these people will invest in oil until the second before it ends the world, so I don’t really see them pulling out voluntarily unless China restricts foreign manufacturing and transactions
These dang capitalist are being real mask off these days, huh
And still very few notice. Amazing
They're too busy buying into it and repeating the little-known truths of how evil China is to everybody else
This is so fucking pathetic lol most cucked nation on Earth no shame at all 
I was hoping that the headline actually meant that executives would be thrown into battle on the front lines
fundamentally unserious country
Death to America
Four star military officers?
Meh don't care unless it's above 4.5
They might want to focus more on how they are going to overcome the serious production gap lol.
I keep forgetting that yanks assume wealth = competence, lmao.
The worst thing the Soviets did was teach Ayn Rand how to read.
Surely these wall street folk must be good at strategy and wealth isn't just a lottery.
Please let me play this boardgame, I will do my best to crush the yankees into the dust like the time I won Twilight Struggle on the first turn.
"I coup Washington"
I have family in Taiwan, fuck these ghoul pieces of shit playing with their lives, may each and every one of them be strapped upright in a wind tunnel with broken glass flying through it.
Fuckin gorilla pose
All my apes, hypersoniced
Boardgame night with the boys (I brought Candy Land)
notice the amount of white faces in the picture
I feel like Chinese State Run media cant come up with a headline as absurd as that
One upping the absurdity of Western MSM
Chinese State Media 
The Onion
Mask all the way off
things are just going to keep getting more unhinged arent they
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