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[-] LouNeko@lemmy.world 7 points 2 hours ago

If God is good, they'll have a thing for goth girls.

[-] JayObey711@lemmy.world 50 points 12 hours ago

There is a Christian bedtime story where I'm from. In the end it says something like "and you'll wake up in the morning if god wants you to". wtf what if god doesn't want me to wake up tomorrow.

[-] greywolf0x1@lemmy.ml 7 points 4 hours ago

the muslims also have an explanation for sleep: "god kills you at night and wakes you up in the morning"

applying simple logic to that would get you mistreated i.e how do you breathe when you're dead?

they have no answer to this

[-] Onsotumenh@discuss.tchncs.de 2 points 3 hours ago

We got a lullaby with that line here in Germany. "Morgen früh, wenn Gott will, wirst du wieder geweckt."

[-] frayedpickles@lemmy.cafe 6 points 9 hours ago
[-] obscur_e@lemm.ee 6 points 9 hours ago

Then you don't

[-] Hupf@feddit.org 4 points 7 hours ago
[-] Kolanaki@yiffit.net 84 points 15 hours ago* (last edited 15 hours ago)

Christian God doesn't even come down to earth in the form of an animal to get you pregnant. You just wake up one morning with a bun in the oven. Dude should at least make it fun. Zeus and Posieden knew how to have a good time.

[-] ziggurat@lemmy.world 4 points 7 hours ago

My favorite story now that Hades 2 the video game is in early access, is that Melenöe, Hades daughter, was conceived by Zeus disguised as Hades hitting up Persephone.

They do skip details like this in the Hades games, also skip incest and inbreeding. They dont skip same gender relationships though, so at least there is some details that are retained

[-] Kolanaki@yiffit.net 3 points 6 hours ago* (last edited 6 hours ago)

I've been holding off getting Hades 2 only because I haven't beaten Hades 1. Which is probably stupid, because it's a roguelike and I could be unable to beat it forever because RNGesus hates me. 🤣

[-] ziggurat@lemmy.world 3 points 3 hours ago

You can do it! Did you beat hades once?

Look up OP builds, use the Hera bow, and start with aprodite's keepsake, and use aprodite's cast with hera bow. This is the only required part for this build. Other than that Athena dash is always the best dash always always, until you find the game becomes easy. Poseidon attack with this build is suggested, but optional.

In the mirror, focus on getting more death defiance, dashes and life regen. After that more health and the one that gives bonus damage if you have two curses on the enemy (you get one from aprodite's cast, and one from poseidon attack + razor shoals boon)

Use the same build over and over again and you will beat hades in a few tries.

Learn the moves, when foes telegraph their attack, dash more. The hardest boss is the second to last boss. Won't explain why, for sake of spoilers of you or someone else hasn't gotten that far.

You should use gold to buy max health, or healing more often. I bet you focus on buying boons first, you don't need that with the build above

When you first manage to beat hades, beat him like 9 times total i think to get the end credits. The prolog after the end credits has more story than before the end credits. Mainly give max amount of nectar to everyone to qualify for the big ending in the prolog

[-] BlueMagma@sh.itjust.works 4 points 6 hours ago
[-] Agent641@lemmy.world 38 points 14 hours ago* (last edited 12 hours ago)

Zeus doesn't even discriminate based on gender. He saw Ganymede, a cute mortal twink herder, and brought him to mt Olympus to be his femboy cup-bearer. Tried for ages to get him pregnant, but with no such luck.

[-] Kalkaline@leminal.space 87 points 16 hours ago

Probably ought to be glad Zeus doesn't exist either.

[-] herrcaptain@lemmy.ca 76 points 16 hours ago

Good call. Everything is Zeus's type.

[-] Agrivar@lemmy.world 11 points 10 hours ago

...I think I'd rather be Zeus's type than Yahweh's...

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[-] Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world 60 points 16 hours ago

Huh.....I spent so much of my life concentrated on the fact that Mary was a lying slut who absolutely had sex with someone. Thus making Jesus not only NOT God's child, but also by definition a bastard.....that I never thought about the story from the perspective of it being true. If you take the story at face value, and God impregnated Mary in her sleep? That makes God a rapist who didn't get consent.

[-] synapse1278@lemmy.world 9 points 7 hours ago

Mary was not virgin until they changed the story later around A.D. 300, during the Romain Catholic Church.

[-] MonkderVierte@lemmy.ml 2 points 3 hours ago* (last edited 1 hour ago)

You have a source to read that up? At least in 452, they (some) were already pretty sure about her being virgin.

Dioscorus then moved to depose Flavian of Constantinople and Eusebius of Dorylaeum on the grounds that they taught the Word had been made flesh and not just assumed flesh from the Virgin and that Christ had two natures.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Council_of_Chalcedon

Edit: the bible was written ca. 300 after christ tho. Probably because of this.

[-] funkless_eck@sh.itjust.works 2 points 2 hours ago

452 is after 300 so that would be consistent with OP, however, here's a "source" such as it is claiming her virginity in 150 AD https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gospel_of_James

OP might be confusing the adipartheos of Mary - the belief that she was a virgin before, during and after the birth of Christ. Some even go as so far as to imply Jesus wasn't born like a human and emerged in some other way, which I'll leave to the readers imagination.

[-] Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world 4 points 4 hours ago

Oh. Damn. I only heard the story AFTER 300AD. I was late to the game, I guess.

[-] SaharaMaleikuhm@feddit.org 5 points 8 hours ago

No way, Religion is all a sham? MIND=BLOWN

[-] Grass@sh.itjust.works 15 points 11 hours ago

In school I tried to bring up this theory that the three wise men all thought they were the father and came bearing gifts for that reason and mary was either lying or totally clueless/tricked. It wasn't well received but nobody was able to refute it with relevant bile quotes or anything.

[-] Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world 12 points 10 hours ago

nobody was able to refute it with relevant bile quotes or anything.

Unclear if typo, or powerful statement.

[-] Fedizen@lemmy.world 3 points 4 hours ago

bile is an important part of your body's functions, don't compare it to the silly storybook

[-] Agrivar@lemmy.world 7 points 10 hours ago

A little from column A, a little from column B? ;-)

[-] Isoprenoid@programming.dev 9 points 11 hours ago* (last edited 11 hours ago)

That makes God a rapist who didn’t get consent.

If we take the story at face value, he did get consent.

And Mary said, “Behold, I am the servant of the Lord; let it be to me according to your word.”

  • Luke 1:38
[-] Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world 17 points 10 hours ago

Man.....dirty talk sure was different back then.

[-] SkyezOpen@lemmy.world 22 points 14 hours ago

Actually an angel appeared and told Mary she was chosen. She said "aight bet." So, technically consent.

[-] danc4498@lemmy.world 14 points 11 hours ago

Your boss shows up and says, “you’ve been chosen”. Say no and you’re fired…

[-] Agent641@lemmy.world 20 points 14 hours ago

Jesus was a bastard who was BFFs with a prozzie, did violence against the wealthy, and spurned authority. God might not listen to Slayer, but I reckon Jesus would have

[-] DontTreadOnBigfoot@lemmy.world 10 points 9 hours ago

Right? Jesus was a real one. Christianity should be metal AF.

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[-] HonoraryMancunian@lemmy.world 12 points 13 hours ago

The priest looks like Father Ted

[-] Slovene@feddit.nl 1 points 4 hours ago* (last edited 4 hours ago)

Luckily it isn't father Jack, cause she would be in trouble.

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this post was submitted on 07 Nov 2024
959 points (97.5% liked)

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