Seeing them banned can feel even more cathartic. The trolls on Lemmy.world don't care if you downvote them, they'll just downvote you back. Some of them probably have multiple accounts and will just downvote you twice, while upvoting themselves. On blahaj and instances like it, there won't be games, they just get banned.

Yeah, and Reddit is one of the most toxic cesspits out there, they only banned subs like fatpeoplehate and itsafetish because of being advertiser friendly. If they hadn't complained those subs probably still would be up spouting hateful garbage.

I was called a freak by my mother and father who told me I would never be a woman, that I'm a man pretending to be a woman. That I was destroying my body by doing HRT. Average shit from right-wing parents. And they wonder why I don't talk to them anymore. Maybe your daughter hates you because you refuse to accept her, and repeatedly deadname and misgender her whenever she called you.

Yeah that was most definitely my worst birthday, so glad I cut those dipshits out of my life.

I only saw one Mod who was for it and he wasn't even using his mod powers to push it, he was just pushing transphobia apologia and happened to be a mod in a different community. He got banned quickly from the community he did it in by the way. Glad he did, I'm sure he would've kept going if they didn't. Though I do regret posting to his community. I might make a post addressing it later in !trans@lemmy.blahaj.zone so people know to steer clear of those communities.

I really hope at some point you get to a point where you can feel comfortable expressing yourself in ways that match who you are. I'll admit it does take some hard work, but the rewards are often worth it, they come in the form of self-acceptance and being happy with who you are.

would be a 6’3 trans woman with shoulders like an NFL linebacker, and likely in my mid to late 40s at best.

I know many people who felt that same way and they still pass wonderfully, yes it does take hard work and does take time. But it's nowhere near as hopeless as it seems.

My family is never going to disown me, mind, I could burn down an orphanage on Christmas Eve and dance in the ashes and my mom would be livid, but that lady would love me and I’d be still welcome at dinner.

I'm glad to hear that your family is accepting. That's more than I can say for my family. I haven't talked to them in almost 7 years. They wanted nothing to do with me when I came out as trans, and were especially disgusted by the idea of me being on HRT. It's nice to hear that your family will still accept you even if you choose to make changes.

I’m never going to feel comfortable in my own skin, so I figure I might as well be uncomfortable and still enjoy the benefits and privilege of cis white guy status. Do I hate my body? Yes. Do I wish I could change in fundamental ways that go far beyond simple weight loss or whatever? God yes. Do I realistically have the resources to make that happen and reach a point where I think I could like my body? No.

I used to feel a very similar way before my egg broke. I thought I could just push it down and live life as a normal cis boy. I couldn't. The dysphoria eventually becomes unbearable. It can feel overwelming and hard to take the first steps, hard to make the first changes. I recommend taking things slow and starting with little things. Maybe you might not be ready for HRT but maybe try out some little social things that might make you happy, like makeup or nail polish, just something that feels gender affirming to you. You could even do these things in private. Just little things that can be first steps then take it slowly from there.

Oh God. I’ve never actually admitted any of this before, and I’m a little scared shitless right now. I seriously may delete this.

It's okay if you want to talk to me about it more privately I can do it in DMs . If you want to reach out to others in the community here are some good communities that can help:

Discussion:

• !mtf@lemmy.blahaj.zone
• !trans@lemmy.blahaj.zone
• !nonbinary@lemmy.blahaj.zone
• !asktransgender@lemmy.blahaj.zone

Memes:

• !egg_irl@lemmy.blahaj.zone
• !traaaaaaannnnnnnnnns@lemmy.ca
• !transmemes@lemmy.blahaj.zone
• !196@lemmy.blahaj.zone

If you want to speak in a more private place I'd recommend joining the Blahaj.zone group on Matrix, instructions on how to join that here: https://lemmy.blahaj.zone/post/15256176

Don't worry, I'm happy to listen to it if it can help out a fellow transfem sister.

I guess that makes sense, not everyone is ready to face themselves at the present time. Though I know from being a stubborn egg growing up, it does eventually weigh on you. That's why it's a good idea to explore sooner. The most important thing is being able to live with yourself and be happy with yourself and your body, I'd suggest revisiting the idea in the future every now and again, eventually one day you might be ready, it can be scary and hard but it can also be rewarding.

!egg_irl@lemmy.blahaj.zone

It's likely they had strong genital dysphoria or other issues surrounding their penis. Most people don't have the desire to cut off their penis, mushrooms or no mushrooms. I've had friends with bad dysphoria who did it, no mushrooms needed, but I can imagine someone also doing it while they're high.

I have a strong feeling it could've also been from gender dysphoria in addition to all that. I should know, I've had my fair share of unpleasant genital dysphoria, and while I didn't do that I wanted to. I also know those who have indeed done it, they did it without any mushrooms but I could see how one of them could've done it on mushrooms.

My thoughts exactly, I'd have to guess they had severe bottom dysphoria, I've had friends who did it for the same reason, no mushrooms though, they just did it out of their sheer desire to no longer have a penis attached to them. Gender dysphoria is no joke and really sucks. I probably would've done it too if the Estrogen hadn't shrunken it so much (and the fact that I'm a wuss when it comes to blood and pain).

I have a feeling it could've been gender dysphoria. I've known people who did that to themselves because of penis dysphoria and they weren't on mushrooms, it's likely they did this to themself for similar reasons and just happened to be on mushrooms.