Dobby?

We get 25 Euros per blood donation here.

What do you recommend to them if they do want to game?

If you count Android too, then this: I got my first Android phone when I was 10 or 11 and rooted it on the first day of having it. This was during a time when we were all still using ClockworkMod because TWRP didn't exist yet, and I somehow ended up with a system without a kernel. Panic ensued, and I spent that entire night (like 10 hours) digging through xda in order to find a tutorial on how to get this damn phone to run again. Imagine having to tell your parents "I broke my phone I got yesterday." I did get it working at like 6:30 AM. Fun times.

You probably have to explain what Serial actually is.

Unfortunately not possible for me. I daily Arch (btw) and hadn't booted into Windows for months and months until my university professor came along and said "btw, we're gonna build GUIs using Microsoft Foundation Classes in Visual Studio now, and yes, you have to use Visual Studio on Windows in the exam". So nope, not uninstalling Windows.

Lichess is better.

Dich haben sie bei der Geburt drei Mal hochgeworfen und zwei Mal aufgefangen.

When you were born, they threw you three times and only caught you twice.

Highest resolution I could find was this:

I have been using Firefox for basically as long as I can remember and I love it. However, there's one website that I go to Chromium for: GeoGuessr/Google Street View. For some reason it's unbelievably slow and sluggish in Firefox whereas it works normally in Chromium. Why could this be? To be clear, it's only the Street View part (and moving/panning/zooming) that's slow on GeoGuessr.

Because they'd rather sell you a new phone than have you repair your device so it lasts longer. It's capitalism at work. Same reason why everyone and their mom is moving their products to a subscription model. They want that steady flow of revenue rather than a one-off purchase price. I hate it but that's what everything goes towards.

I could see someone wanting to change their display glass and if that's not feasible due to availability or cost I could see that as a valid reason for a new phone but I agree that the battery is by far the biggest reason to change a phone.