Ik snap m ook niet

Die tweede is mijn versie van de hel

Not really. Most of us start learning it in elementary school, so you kind of grow up with it.

Are you still in that situation or do you mean that that happened in the past? For me it got better once I left home. Although I was still in contact with her. Now it is much better, because I only occasionally have contact with her and only via text. It took me years to get there, but I did. I hope you do too if you have not already.

Thanks! I think you are describing what a lot of people experience. Weight loss is highly complex and by oversimplifying it, lots of people do not get the help they need and are made to feel bad about themselves.

There is actually quite some scientific work supporting what I am saying. For example, this is an article in Journal of Obesity. It discusses the role of willpower and provides an overview of some of the research on other factors that affect whether people lose weight, such as metabolic compensation.

This is another interesting paper in the Irish Journal of Medical Science on patient's view on obesity as a disease. I think the conclusion of this study aligns well with some of my claims:

The presence of beliefs and perceptions to support the narrative that obesity is a choice, that choosing to eat less and move more effectively treats the disease and willpower is a principle determinant of weight loss maintenance may negatively impact long-term treatment. A belief that obesity is a choice will see prevention and treatment strategies continually focus on education regarding eating less and moving more, which may be suboptimal. Therefore, the narrative must change and align with the science regarding the biology of obesity as a disease.

[This] (https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0953620521000029) paper on weight regain also claims that it is not just about compliance with a diet, but that, amongst others, metabolic adaptation and changed appetite play an important role as well.

I am personally quite interested in work on obesity due to eating disorders. The reason for this is that I suffered from an eating disorder causing obesity for most of my life (fortunately, I do not have the disorder anymore). The constant pressure to just eat less and getting blamed if you fail, severely increased my eating disorder and I saw the same thing happen to others with similar issues. I know that this is anecdotal and not everyone that is obese has an eating disorder and not everyone with an eating disorder is the same. However, there is some limited evidence that weight neutral treatment of binge eating disorder has better outcomes. This and treatment for my CPTSD is exactly what worked for me.

Sorry to hear that. I have PTSD as well (but from other causes). For me EMDR, imagery rescripting and psychosomatic physiotherapy helped. It did not completely solve it, but it made it much better. Maybe some things to try if you have not done so, and you want to.

Here it is the 5th, and we tell children it is the birthday of Sinterklaas.

Well, maybe they were and I guessed wrong. ;-)

Does not look like me at all, but very realistic!

Could be. But worse things happen in reality.

That sounds like many complications for getting the help you need. I am glad people are supporting you, but it still seems very stressful.

If you ever get the chance to get further treatment. Maybe you can ask whether EMDR is useful in your case. For me it worked very well for my PTSD. I also think that, generally, it might require less treatments than other forms of therapy. So it might mean less of a financial burden. I am not a doctor, so I do not know what is best in your case, but you might ask about it.

No need to be embarrassed. What you describe is more than enough to cause this type of response. I know it is different in different countries, but why can you not get help? Is it too expensive where you are? PTSD and these types of issues is treatable, so it is very likely that you will not suffer like this in the long term.