This weekend I aim to relax as much as my children will let me. But my younger daughter turns one on Sunday. So, we’ll likely celebrate that.

It's obviously pretty novice, and the subject matter is r o u g h, but I don't think it's bad. Needs more art to it, but I think it'll evolve.

Just sprang out of my head while I was in the shower and I scribbled it down while it was fresh. Never happened to me before.

Today I read a headline that said "Doctor who saved a senator's life now stranded...", but I only read the first part as "Doctor Who, saves a senator's life". I was like Doctor Who? Saved someone's life? That's amazing!

Sigh

So, my 10yo and I have a pretty great relationship. She's smart and funny and curious and all the things I might have hoped I could raise a kid to be. That said, she idolizes her mom. As much as she is like me, Daddy is definitely the "boring" parent, because my job is stupider than my wife's and also much less demanding, so I do all the routine stuff. I don't want to play it up; like I said she and I get along extremely well, there's just more "companionable silence" than with mommy. I enjoy being the one doing the field trips, school pickup, doctor's appointments, etc. We get a lot of good time together, but frankly there's so much of it that we'd both be exhausted if I tried to make it all scintillating. So, Daddy is important, daddy is loved, but mommy is to be emulated.

One of the most "Dad" things I do (though there are many, let me check my cargo shorts for the notes I took...) is slightly exaggerate the differences in my 90s exurban Florida upbringing and her 2020s suburban Texas upbringing. It being fuckin' Florida, I don't actually have to lie, but I do tend to pile on 20 years' worth of stories from me and my acquaintances to get a rise out of her. It works on Lemmy too! Mommy eggs it on, I think because she secretly sees it as a bonding thing for the two of them. They also bond over not liking boiled peanuts, but wrong as that is, my tolerance knows no bounds, and I love them anyway.

So anyway, kiddo's clothing choices are generally based entirely on her interests or on things mommy got for her, and god bless 'em, it is probably for the best (c.f. the aforementioned cargo shorts). Today, though, they are are going on a field trip to the school district's outdoor learning center. It has been drilled into them that they will be outside, that there will be dirt, that there will be animals, and very specifically that the most common of those animals will be bugs. She doesn't really like the outdoors (the half-assed hayride at her little Texas cousin's other grandparents' place did not go well), and she hates bugs. They advised to wear loose but long-fitting clothes, closed shoes that can get dirty, and just generally to be prepared for a different type of day. I asked if she even wanted to go, but she loves school and her friends generally, and the promise of tame mammals was more than enough.

Today, for the first time that I can recall, my assertive, self-assured, opinionated daughter turned down her many other options and, over her long-sleeve sun-shirt, she chose to wear one of two Florida Gators t-shirts she owns, and not even the cute one with the big orange heart, but the coarse, box-cut thing with an angry, fading mascot (shut up, !cfb@fanaticus.social, I hear it) in a football uniform, the one even I wouldn't have bought for her, though I was pleased when her older cousins back in Florida give it to us as a hand-me-down. I am happy, but I am also down to exactly two theories:

1. This is easily her most "disposable" shirt and she doesn't care at all if it gets ruined.

2. She is more anxious than she's let on, and much like an eye bead or a crucifix, this choice of a totemic beast of her father's homeland is to invoke some sort of ancestral magic to protect her from the unknowable horrors of the unexplored. Y'know... a farm. 🤣

Hello, I am 20F and have been texting this guy (21) I met for about 2 years now. We actually live close to each other. It’s about 30 to 40 minutes but throughout the time when we will plan a date, either he or I would cancel for me, it was due to insecurities (We’ll get into that later). He has expressed to me many times that he’s likes me and gives me compliments but I am not gonna lie and say that I am not a cause as to why me and him aren’t together. I used to do s*x work on the side because of my financial state. He was coming on pretty strong on wanting to date but I didn’t want to hurt him in the end or lie to him if we did start dating. So I told him. The reaction wasn’t great, we didn’t talk for a while after that.

{He has told me the type of women he likes, woman that loves god, wants kids and marriage, goes to the gym all that good stuff. Me on the other is an atheist, don’t want neither and I’m 117lbs, so I don’t see how he’s attracted, I just think of it as settling. He was adopted into a good family with money and I’m poor, literally nothing to my name. I went through his following on insta that shows me what you’re interested in and it was mostly girls that are not of my color. He doesn’t even follow men of my color, so why are you even pursuing this.It just doesn’t make sense.}

After I told him, he proposed we be friends with benefits, I shut that down and told him that sounds very degrading to ask me after he just told me he wouldn’t want his own woman doing such work. He apologized and were just texting on and off for a while. And then we were doing good as friends until we got into this debate (we think differently on most things so it’s something we do a lot) this particular time, he started to talk about the type of woman that he’s looking for (again) and I responded by saying that I’m not looking for a man or marriage or kids. I just want to be able to experience my life now when I’m young. He got into a whole rant, I stood on what I said then got blocked lol.

2 days later I got a text from him, he was checking up on me. I told him I missed him and he said he missed me too. I asked him why he blocked me he said (in his words) “I think i just liked u and i didn’t wanna get hurt. So I kinda said fuck it, imma just save myself the trouble.” He apologized and we were good, yesterday he was venting about how lonely he is and how hard it is to find the girl that he wants. I tried to give him suggestions, knocked it all down. In his rant he even included me in it saying I was joking with him (I didn’t realize that he said that until way later in our conversation) so I wasn’t able to go deep into what he meant, but I wasn’t joking with him. After his vent we went back to talking normally but I probably said something I shouldn’t, I told him I’ll be moving soon to Fl, we live in the Northeast. He then says “Should I take you out at least once since I never met you” and I said “Too late” he responded saying “cool” and then after that he was just giving me dry messages after that and then left me in delivered. I wasn’t really serious about it, I should’ve told him or put an “lol” so he wouldn’t think I was serious but damage done once again. I think I’m just meant to be single.

Controversial hot take, I know... but in certain cases, normalcy and routine is the desired state. After a long weekend of family events, too many kids (of which most are my own), too many pets (of which roughly half are my own), and the house being drafty with the entire in-law clan and then some for the past few days, things are now finally back to normal.

Kids are in school, SO at work, and I'm in my home "office" (I use my bedroom), arranging the coming week. I schedule most things to "ot today" because now it's MY time. When picking up some supplies this morning I even bought one single beer that is for my lunch, and beyond that my work day will mostly be centered around waiting for various balls that are in other people's courts.

Anyone else who usually welcome mondays when they arrive?

Reading is a recent development for me in the grand scheme of things, dyslexia meant I was hindered till I was about 18, picking up my first actual book 1984 at the age of 24.

10 years later I read roughly 3 books a year.

Currently reading Manufacturing Consent and whilst I knew news media is often misleading, to what extent was not clear sadly I now know the extent.

I'd like to have a conversation about Manufacturing Consent and what people have come away with. Other books too like Bullshit Jobs and Ordinary Men were big shift for my world view, so talking about and recommendations of similar books as well please.

Best of luck

I have had food poisoning all night and day. Lemmy kept my spirits up with a steady flow of posts to laugh at.

I’ve done IT. I’ve finally mastered IT (couldn’t resist 😁).

I’ve been in school (part time) since 2019 working my way to this day. Now that it’s here, I’m both super excited and a little anxious. Now what do I do? 🤣

Anyway, thank you for reading and have a wonderful day!

"Being confident" is dangerously close to straight up bothering people. Plus it only really works if you're good looking.

!movies@lemm.ee, the post is pinned.

If you can't find it, you can use this link in the search bar: https://lemm.ee/post/31335226

what ever happened to the teen on skype writing :3 and uwu and ilu everywhere? ;-; maybe i wasn't happier then but at least i was looking forward to things :^) it's b-better than being misewable right? :c

Honestly, I'd rather go back to having adds pre video than youtubers who sneak in obvious ads.

I'm talking about these videos where they give you advice on a specific topic like 12 life lessons and the 7th life lesson is better sleep quality and suddenly they say this video is sponsored by XY pharmacy go get your Melatonin now and move on to the 8th life lesson.

Or how to make friends videos and suddenly they transition into a Magnesium add because better sleep = more friends.

It doesn't make the other arguements less valueable but I lose interest in those youtubers quite fast for that reason. I'm always like: "Oh no I know where this is heading too..." when I am listening to a video in my car and yep, I am most of the time correct - it's an ad.

I see they need money but if you have millions of subscribers I can't understand. Throw an ad before the video starts or something but make a video about the topic.

For those who like a good dark comedy, wanted to hear what other thought of this

Hello all. I wanted to make this post because I feel like venting a bit. I know the “cure” to my problem is CBT or exposure therapy, but I was hoping to speak to like-minded people or anybody who feels like sharing their thoughts.

I hate that I’m not able to enjoy summer like most others. I hate that I flinch at the very sound of buzzing or the sight of flying insects. I know that it’s an irrational fear, I know it’s not normal and I know I look stupid when I cover my ears or flee into my room whenever I see or hear an insect. I’ve been told “they can’t hurt you, they’re nothing” so many times and I know they can’t hurt me but why is there minimal understanding of this phobia? I hate that whenever I tell people about this, I’m mostly met with “yeah they’re disgusting I hate them too”; it’s not that I find them disgusting, it’s that they cause me heart-pumping palm-sweating fear. It’s that I can’t enjoy landscapes and being out in the country like regular folks, I’m always alert and on the watch whenever I’m on an excursion because the fear and anxiety is so greatly installed in me. It’s that I sometimes end up hallucinating the buzzing sounds that jerks me awake.

This definitely sounds like self-pity, and honestly it is. Because sometimes you just feel sorry for yourself and today is that day for me. I hope I can enjoy this summer despite these creatures. I hope I can speak to people who suffer from the same phobia, or people with any degree of empathy at all.

I am feeling pretty detached at the moment. Figure I would use this space to think aloud.

I have been fighting with admin at my school for proper support for me as a teacher and for help fixing a broken program for my students. I got laid off effective the end of the school year. Think it might be because I was a pain in the ass, but I don't know for sure. I wasn't doing a great job because they overloaded me. More different classes than most teachers. Shit support.

Covid money ran out, they had to lay off some of the conditionally certified teachers and I was one of them. The timing was just... all my complaints, I they were making me cover a position that was vacant while doing my regular teaching, and the students were missing out. I don't think I could prove it but it feels like they got rid of me because I was not satisfied with their answers.

I can't bring myself to finish getting my teacher certification. I'd have to go out of county to teach.

I worked 10 years with the homeless, burnt out and fucked it up. Then 2 years working for a law firm supposedly helping people and figure out its just bullshit, helping people was incidental and barely helped. Worked for the cops supposedly helping addicts in person, they just wanted me to do data entry. No idea what I should do.

It took a lot of courage to get myself to try being a teacher. 3 years at the schools and now I fucking again have to figure out what to do all over again.

And I have to go into the school for over a month and pretend everything is okay. Fuck I hate this.

I got stuck on a lunchtime video conference today with some people in my department and a vendor. I hate meetings at noon, but with timezones being a factor, it was the only available time the vendor could meet. Usually, I'm only on these for technical consultation, so I rarely need to speak other than to clarify a point or answer questions about our infrastructure. Those are usually toward the end of the meeting.

That said, I just muted myself and ate at my desk because I was starving and would have plenty of time to eat a quick bite before it got to the point where I had to say anything.

What I did not realize was that even though I was muted, my webcam was on. So 6 people I work with plus three vendors all watched me eat a bag of tacos, and no one said anything!

Like, when I eat a taco with people around, I do eat it in a dignified way. Less so when I'm alone (or think I'm alone) and wolfing it down before I have to do something So, yeah, it was not a pretty sight.

I'm still mortified, but at least I am laughing about it as I'm typing this out.

I’ve been thinking about getting a black cat after graduation. I want to pick a black cat cuz I think they’re pretty cool. So might as well think of a name first rather than giving them one when I am actually carrying them home.

One of my friends has given me the name “Murphy” and I think that’s actually kinda cool, like 4 out of 5. I was thinking Inky, Pancake, and Filigraph (if the cat is striped). What do you think about the names? Are there any other cool names?