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submitted 10 months ago by Stamets@lemmy.world to c/adhd@lemmy.dbzer0.com

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[-] LouNeko@lemmy.world 11 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

I'll go for the "Don't get diagnosed" and "Kill yourself in your 30s" strat.

Edit: For anybody actually trying to unassigned variable themselves, please be adviced. There are CEOs on your way out and be carefully NOT to take any of them with you. That would be AWFULL and HIGHLY illegal. We ABSOLUTELY DESPERATELY need those CEOs, so please be carefull with them.

[-] pixeltree@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 points 10 months ago

Same, thou I'm not sure I can wait out the last couple years to 30. Might be fun to have my birthday be my deathday tho

[-] Gasandthefuhrerious@lemmy.zip 12 points 10 months ago

You uh...ok? It does not sound fun to have your birthday be your death day :(.

[-] pixeltree@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 10 months ago

Life is both pointless AND miserable and it would be fine if it were just one or the other but I'm just so fucking tired of putting effort into a life that I hate living

[-] ZeroAlias@sh.itjust.works 2 points 10 months ago

Please don't hurt yourself. You are worthy of love.

[-] pixeltree@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 10 months ago

Worthy? I can accept that. The problem is my presence in someone's life would only make theirs worse. Well it would be a problem if I were capable of seeking out a relationship which I'm not. Not even comfortable with hookups anymore. Accepted that love, affection, and intimacy just aren't for me.

[-] ZeroAlias@sh.itjust.works 1 points 10 months ago

Relationships aren't for everyone, and that's fine if its your choice and you are actually happy with it. Regardless, life is worth living. It may not seem like it now (I've been there) but I assure you there is a reason you're here. Keep your head up.

[-] pixeltree@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 10 months ago

If I start hoping, it's just gonna make everything hurt more

[-] ZeroAlias@sh.itjust.works 1 points 10 months ago

No need to hope. Just keep going. I know how it feels and I know I would have said the same in your position but all I can say is keep going. I'm rooting for you. If there is something I can do that will help, let me know.

[-] pixeltree@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 10 months ago

Nowhere near it, but haven't started looking for a place to get a helium or nitrogen tank yet so I call it a win. Tbh I should hurry up so I have more money left to leave to friends and family but I just haven't been able to get around to it.

[-] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 5 points 10 months ago

Your friends would almost certainly rather have you than any money you would give them.

[-] pixeltree@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 10 months ago

I mean, sure, but I see them irl maybe once a year, and it's easy to forget people exist (or existed) when you only interact with them online. I'm always the one reaching out and trying to do things and god knows I've let enough friendships vanish by getting sick of it and stopping initiating things and watching them never notice.

[-] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 2 points 10 months ago

I don't think it's as easy as you think. It sure isn't for me. There are a lot of friends I have lost touch with over the years that I think of often. And hope are still around.

[-] pixeltree@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 10 months ago

At this point it's just more of a question of when, not if

🤷‍♀️

[-] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 2 points 10 months ago

If I had lost touch with a friend and then suddenly I got some money they willed to me after they killed themselves, I would be pretty sad about it. Even if I had forgotten about them until I got the money. I'd also feel very guilty that we lost touch because I would think maybe I could have done something.

[-] pixeltree@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 10 months ago

Yeah and for now the crushing guilt is keeping me pinned down. At some point, things will get bad enough that I no longer care who I hurt and I'll do it anyways and I'm such a piece of shit for it. Ah well, add it to the pile of reasons