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Anon blows his dad's mind
(sh.itjust.works)
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this post was submitted on 12 Mar 2026
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talk to him about non-nippulous topics, like football, or canned beer (do NOT mention draft)
Help. What if I already mentioned draft
Well now he's going to rant about Vietnam
Did you see that ludicrous display last night?
What was Wenger thinking, sending Walcott on that early?
Or, say "hey how are your nipples" and when he says "what" you reply "what" too, to play with his mind. Then he will question wether the first nipple conversation even happened
I can get behind full-on nipple torturing someone’s dad. Constantly mispronounce words- refer to nickels as nipples as you pay for small items. Talking about your city should involve at least occasionally saying something to the effect of “I’m a big fan of this areola, but that one’s been sucked dry by greedy housing developers.”
Maybe cut the nipples out of your shirts. Definitely cut the nipples out of his shirts. Ask him whether he’s cold, glance down, and then adjust the thermostat without waiting to hear his answer.
Change your lock screen photo to a cropped version of this. Replace your light fixtures with boob lights and ask him to help tighten the nipples. “Just give them a twist, I’m begging you.” Serve him Vietnamese milk melons daily. In fact, every meal or snack has to involve dairy or dairy alternative milks.
Yeah, I think I could get this guy’s dad to cry within 2 days. 3 if he’s vegan.
Damn! That's far beyond what I was proposing... this took a dark turn... dark and pointy turn
It’s a little nipply outside. What? I said it’s nippy outside.
Jesus Christ! Go back to waterboarding people in Gitmo, you don't belong in polite society!
Are you some sort of torture mastermind? Holy fuck 😂 even accounting for potential difficulties.
Dastardly
Football balls have nipples though.
It is where you blow them up with.
I've been using dynamite all wrong. It's no wonder I was kicked off the team.