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/c/café daily chat thread for 8 October 2023
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this post was submitted on 07 Oct 2023
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Café
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Welcome to our virtual third place, The Café.
Come on in and make a new human connection over a cup of coffee (or Teh Tarik). This is a casual community, do whatever you want, share your oyen pics, your frustrations, and even organize a weekend picnic with the community. The world is your oyster.
Rules are simple, be kind and civil with each other. As with any other café, rude patrons will be kicked out.
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Anyone else experience getting over someone and then just randomly falling back into that heartbreak randomly months later? His voice echoes in my head, I'm desperately trying to remember what he looked like, I miss the jokes we had... I wish things would have gone differently. If I could have just held on, things could have sorted themselves out and I could be happy right now. Instead I'm just lonely.
I've been through this not too long ago, and it took me close to 2 years to get over her, but yeah, it does happened from time to time after the initial few months, stuff will suddenly flood back and i will feel so lonely and extremely depressed. It's almost 2 years now and i barely think of her, but the harm she caused will take a lot longer to heal up. Still lonely though.
But for your case, i believe you ditch him for a good reason, i know it will hurt because it's comfortable to stay and hold on than to have no one by your side, but sometime it's best to let go than to hold on, because there's no telling whether he will change. It take time to heal, a lot of time, just be kind to yourself.
You probably didn’t get over the person.. you could still be happy without your ex or anyone (in the future) for that matter.
And perhaps it’s worth thinking about why do you miss the person in the first place. Do you miss him because you feel lonely? Or do you miss him because you’re not as happy as you’ve hoped so you think about your previous fond memories?
I'm definitely lonely, and also depressed over how life has gone for the past months. I don't have much to celebrate. I don't really think of him that fondly tbh. I do always remember the hurt that was caused, even more than the good stuff, but under there is just the feeling of comfort, belonging, and something close to love.