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this post was submitted on 09 Jul 2024
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chapotraphouse
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It would be funny if he's spent all this time doing all sorts of events coked up on some crazy chem regime, and then he dies anyway from old age melting his brain.
Young aide: "So, doc - will medical regimen make him like the bionic man?"
Old Doc Scranton: "Bionic? How old are you? Actually - never mind that. Google 'bionic' later. The regimen will make him seem much better than he is for... very roughly for two months. Maybe longer or maybe shorter."
Young aide: "And after that?"
Old Doc Scranton: "I can't say but it won't be good. It might get bad - in fact. You all better pray he makes it until election day. The light that burns twice as bright burns half as long."
Young aide: "Is that something I should google too?"
Old Doc Scranton: "Yeap."
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I had too much fun typing that up. I'm going to reuse those characters at least one more time.