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this post was submitted on 11 Nov 2024
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Growing up poor, and eventually working my way into a tech job dealt me a long stream of culture shocks. Just socialising with people earning over 100k is wild. The vacations, hobbies, and even anecdotes, are all so different than what I imagined. I feel I betray my roots a thousand times a day.
I know this is just basic working class petit bourgeois stuff (that I'm part of), but the carefree attitude is so alien to me. I can't imagine feeling so entitled to luxury.
Im not so sure 100k will give folks super vacations and hobbies anymore. I mean if it just crests it.
I've never actually been on a vacation, so maybe my view of what constitutes luxury isn't the norm... Yeah without context I get that 100k+ is just a really good livable income.
So I suppose it depends how long they've had it and if they have generational wealth. Like I've earned 100k but I'm the only one in my family to do so, so I spend most of it working down debt, and supporting family.
I get that there are richer people. But of my personal experience, it seems like people that don't have that kind of reverse inheritance of poor roots get to live such carefree lives.
While still being working class ofc
Im single income with a wife with many medical issues. Im currently unemployed and Im trying to figure out how low I can take. 80k and we have to draw from savings. A bit over 2k a month medical costs, 2k for housing, 2k for everything else every month. Then figured out taxes on that. so I net it. Im also getting older with not enough retirement savings. Granted its way cheaper for one person who is healthy. I can't imagine if we had kids how bad this would be. Certainly would easily make 100k inadequate. now granted two people making 60k is one person makeing 120k.
In most countries you are taxed note the more you earn, so two people earning 60k is MORE than 1 person earning 120k.
Taxes are paid in brackets and having two independent incomes makes each one fill their own lower bracket before going for the upper ones.
It does make a difference, in Spain for example nowadays even married couples fill taxes separately because it's just not worth it tax wise to join incomes.
US actually pretty much doubles the brackets when filed as a married couple. They did this awhile back for that exact reason were filing seperately often made more sense. Now it makes way more sense to file married if single income and is sorta a wash if both make the same amount.
I feel like those who end up in your position end up one of two ways.
You know that you don't have a safety net, so you don't spend money more than you need to. Also, since it sounds like you support your family significantly, a lot of money that would go to vacations instead goes to them.
For others, money was an on/off switch; you either have it or you don't. These kinds of people will spend at or above their means because they can and there aren't any hard limits due to a lot of credit options.
Here they call them $30,000 millionaires - people who are living beyond their means in nice apartments uptown, driving expensive cars, bars, etc. - everything on credit, which will crash later, instead of living a regular ok life today. It's an old term so its now likely $60k.
Sounds like so many people in Dallas.
Yup, I feel that. My "new" car purchase this year was a used 2015 Nissan leaf that was like 6k. It baffles me how my colleagues budget their money. A rivian?? Son, that's the cost of a new roof.
EDIT: I don't know new car prices so I had to look it up. It's actually almost the cost of two new roofs! The high end model is a down payment for a nice house in my market!
Depending on their circumstances, they might already have the new roof too. Or more likely they bought the vehicle with a minimal down payment and stretched the loan across 80 months.
How big is your roof?
Yep, I have no idea how people are able to afford stuff like that! Some of our friends have these crazy hobbies and go out to eat all the time, multiple cruises a year, etc. Meanwhile a ‘date night’ for us is Chipotle and DVDs of whatever show we are watching that we borrowed from the Library. That is the only way we can afford our modest one side of a duplex. And I feel like I make ok money but I guess everyone we know just makes so much more, or we are just very strict with our budgeting and credit usage.
I'm with you. I make mid-100s myself and as a single homeowner with no children I still can't afford to go on funky vacations.
My take home after 401k and taxes is like $7,600 a month and my mortgage, heloc, car and student loans eat about $5,000 of that.
But, car will be paid off in the next few months, student loans should be done about 2 years after that, he lock will be done about 2 years after that so 5 years from now it's only going to cost me like $2,500 a month to keep my home.
I have been told that I fit into the Henry class, "high earning, not rich yet".
I just wonder if I can keep going for 5 years to accomplish that or if I should just finish up the house and sell it and pocket the 200k in value it's accrued, pay off any other outstanding debt, and then go find an apartment or something or go travel.
Cheers to that. I've gone through the same thing. My tech work had me installing wireless equipment on highrise roofs in a major city. One time I went down from the roof to the top floor penthouse to set up the owner big wig dude with our service. It was an absolutely beautiful place, and I was just taking it in, and was admiring the view from the balcony. He started showing off the view and really went on about it, inviting me out to the balcony. I should have taken the hint that it was important to him, and just gone with it, but I mentioned I just came from a better view and pointed up half joking and it completely deflated the dude. He probably isn't even allowed up there on the roof, and I had a 360 view up there. I tried to recover and fumbled out something like 'but to wake up to it every morning, wow' but the damage was done, I one upped the millionaire on accident.
Likewise, I grew up on a council estate in the north of England. Worked my way up to a good education and eventually created a $250k consulting business in London.
My experience of six figure earners in London was that many were also "new", their parents had been working class, which I suppose points to some social mobility and meritocracy left in Britain.
For others it was totally normal. Not that they were from money, but in the more mundane sense that they'd grown up in London, they and all their friends had gotten tutor support by parents who both worked and for whom looking at the job opportunities on offer in London, a six figure salary was a realistic prospect after working some years. This is probably the category I aspire for my kids to be in
Then there are the kids from money. Not unpleasant people, Britain doesn't quite have that competitiveness in the same way. Bragging about income is still crass. But they did seem genuinely clueless of the grief they'd been spared because bank of mum+dad bunged them a loan of 500k when they bought their first place, which they then paid back fairly effortlessly.
The most unpleasant people I ever dealt with were rich people from other countries. Maybe because in Britain money doesn't buy you class or respect.
Also grew up poor. But, wow, I wish earning over $100k was enough for vacations and hobbies in Seattle... I make around $150k, have a tiny home, and have only had one vacation since before COVID. I mean owning a home at all is pretty significant here, I guess.
I could probably do better if I moved far enough out of the city, but I'd lose a lot of conveniences that would cost me lots of time and money mostly around transportation, parking, shopping, etc. I do have a few hobbies, but most of my hobby time is used in home maintenance because it's a 118 year old home... These days it takes about $250k around here to really start to have extra money for nice vacations and hobbies.
Dunno why you got downvoted. Shit’s expensive. We’re doing pretty good, but live in a very plain, 60 year old home, no new cars, but we do manage a decent vacation once every other year or so. I don’t understand the “carefree” attitude being described with a $100k salary, we have to budget, plan expenses, and any big bills are still a surprise and an unhappy event.
We don’t live in major metro area, or even in the suburbs of one.
Also grew up poor. I know exactly how you feel. I don't have a partner and kids to take care of and I make good money in tech. I've shoved enough back to retire early (theoretically, I guess we'll see) and now I'm out here with no car payment, a mostly paid off mortgage, and I'm spending too much on hobbies.
It's still wild to me.
I don't want to like suck all the joy out of your life, but check out the cheap hobbies! Reading, writing, knitting, drawing, some sports, etc.
I briefly made the dumbass decision to take up cigars and cognac as "hobbies." Ugh I don't know what I was thinking. Anyway, quitting smoking and drinking has moved to much more reasonable substances, like tea and baking.