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Fax machine (lemmy.world)
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[-] einlander@lemmy.world 145 points 2 weeks ago

She can cum if she wants to, she can leave her friends behind.

[-] dream_weasel@sh.itjust.works 39 points 2 weeks ago

Cuz her friends dont cum and if they don't cum that's their choice and I don't mind.

[-] tpihkal@lemmy.world 22 points 2 weeks ago

Yeah, that's what my brain said too 😂

[-] TheLowestStone@lemmy.world 3 points 2 weeks ago

I'd rather she bring her friends along...

[-] anonymouse2@sh.itjust.works 2 points 2 weeks ago

Cum if she wants to. Cum around the world.

[-] terminhell@lemmy.world 89 points 2 weeks ago

Jokes aside - I've heard, from sex therapist friends that getting off isn't your partners job. It's yours. Your partner is there just to help.

[-] theUwUhugger@lemmy.world 49 points 2 weeks ago

Sex therapist sounds a lot more fun job that it probably is!

[-] Grimy@lemmy.world 36 points 2 weeks ago

It's not premature ejaculation, my partner is just really good at helping. Its always my fault though.

[-] the_radness@lemmy.world 14 points 2 weeks ago

Howdy-do, fellow minute-man!

If your dick can't do the walking, let your tongue do the talking.

[-] joyjoy@lemm.ee 24 points 2 weeks ago

With the exception of "if you came, it doesn't mean you consented"

[-] Randomgal@lemmy.ca 1 points 2 weeks ago

I mean sure. It's also okay to want a partner that cares about your experience during intimate, vulnerable acts instead of a guy who sees you as just a useful hole

[-] Skullgrid@lemmy.world -5 points 2 weeks ago

I guess, but my history makes me feel like I'm batting a thousand. I guess I bring that "I'll do what your body needs, lemme know" kinda vibe to the bedroom.

Have there been misses? Of course. Have there been partners that achieved orgasm in ways they didn't think would happen? Also yes.

[-] rc__buggy@sh.itjust.works 2 points 2 weeks ago
[-] Skullgrid@lemmy.world 1 points 2 weeks ago

Just finished getting the baby ready for my wife to take her to group childcare.

[-] joyjoy@lemm.ee 61 points 2 weeks ago

It's my party I can cum if I want to

[-] Skullgrid@lemmy.world 27 points 2 weeks ago

sir, this is a fast food establishment.

[-] sundray@lemmus.org 14 points 2 weeks ago

Please take off the crown before you leave.

[-] mydoomlessaccount@infosec.pub 60 points 2 weeks ago

If her friends don't cum- and if they don't cum- well they're no friends of mine

[-] ceenote@lemmy.world 55 points 2 weeks ago

You seem to be close to orgasm! Would you like assistance? Please sign this consent form.

[-] BlueKey@fedia.io 28 points 2 weeks ago

I read the first two sentences with an image of Clippy in my head.

[-] lime@feddit.nu 16 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

clitty the intimacy assistant

Edit: "orifice assistant" was right there. fuck.

[-] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 5 points 2 weeks ago

clippy would say "sounds like you're..."

[-] _druid@sh.itjust.works 43 points 2 weeks ago

I don't make her cum, I allow her to, once she's earned it. And she better thank me for it.

Then hugs and kisses all around, and usually a snack and some coffee after (she loves when I pour her a cup of coffee).

[-] loomy@lemy.lol 31 points 2 weeks ago
[-] match@pawb.social 21 points 2 weeks ago

weird how all your sexual partners don't seem to want to cum when you're around tho

[-] qarbone@lemmy.world 4 points 2 weeks ago

I've noticed these coincidences. It's starting to look like a pattern.

[-] SnokenKeekaGuard@lemmy.dbzer0.com 8 points 2 weeks ago

Thats a true woman lover

[-] 21Cabbage@lemmynsfw.com 7 points 2 weeks ago

If an own goal was ever worth a trophy this is a great example.

[-] Stovetop@lemmy.world 6 points 2 weeks ago

Title made me think of one of my favorite videos.

https://youtu.be/xWyUs3CLE0Y

[-] otacon239@lemmy.world 4 points 2 weeks ago

YESSSS. This was one of the first videos I ever saw back on the legendary r/youtubehaiku in its heyday.

this post was submitted on 21 May 2025
771 points (98.5% liked)

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