I remember seeing Malcom Forbes riding in a giant hot air balloon and riding a motorcycle across China.

I remember seeing Richard Branson kite surfing with a super model

I remember this guy throwing a Na$i salute

The worst part is that I genuinely bought it until I saw which space this is.

With all the crazy shit so far this wouldn’t even surprise me.

Honestly, I would prefer him just to have the $1 trillion. I’ve still got some self respect

Unbelievable quote for a Tesla shareholder...

That is too high of a price

And they have to tell him they think he's smart and his degrees are real.

Obviously fake. He’s going to take over a large country with that $1 trillion.

Finally something unrealistic enough for the Onion, again.

I'd rather double up

This one gets a made me look award, seriously this timeline is garbage

The sales targets for Elon's $1T payday are so astronomical and they've been set up in the face of enormous headwinds.

Certainly possible Elon uses the promise of a future payment as leverage on new loans, so he can continue debt-financing his billionaire lifestyle. But like so much else, this is promising you $$$ on Tuesday for a cheeseburger today. The board rubber stamped a check they have no intention of seeing cashed.

Hey Elon. The really cool people died young. Just sayin' it's not too late for you.

He really had everyone fooled for a while but he just couldn't keep it together.

or they acknowledge his gaming skills

Sorry, that would be fake news.

Muskrat will never be cool. He will always be a shit stain. No matter how much money this parasite gets, he will always be known as the Nazi-saluting PoS that he is...