Simon & Garfunkel; Mrs. Robinson

Jesus loves you more than you will know

=

She’s a slut more than you could know—whoa, who, whoa!

Baking Carrot Biscuits != Taking Care of Business

From high school until two or three weeks ago, I thought the lyrics for Limp Bizkit's "Just Like This" were concerned about John Goodman's weight.

"...and we make sure that John Goodman beats fat"

The song randomly popped into my head a few weeks ago, and I was like "wait, that can't be right". So I looked up the correct lyrics which are "And we made sure that John kept them beats phat"

I wish I didn't have to ~~pee~~ be so bad.

-blink 182 - Wendy Clear

and the most prominent

I ~~wore cologne~~ walk alone to get the feeling right

-blink 182 - What's My Age Again.

Though sometimes when Tom and Mark performs live, they butchered some lines for some dumb jokes lol.

Working with guys who's 1st language isn't English singing "Take me to Monkey Town", instead of "Take me to Funky Town."

I had a friend in grade school that argued with me about the lyrics to Kenny Rodgers The Gambler. He was loudly and angrily certain the song said "You gotta know how to hold 'em" and would NOT hear my suggestion that it is really "when to hold 'em".

The next day he quietly told me I was right.

There this French fold band, Skáld that usually sings in Old Norse language. In the song Hross, the first line of the chorus is "Hverir eru þeir tveir?". The way they sing those first two words sounds like "Fevereiro", which is the Portuguese (my native language) word for February.

I just can't understand 90% of lyrics.

"Carry a laser" - Mr. Mister

Golden Earring - Radar Love

We've got a thing that's called ~~red hot love~~

We've got a wave in the air

~~Red hot love~~

In my defense, I was hearing this over sometimes-fuzzy analog radio rather than off a tape or CD where the track title might clue me in. Less defensible: not noticing the other words that make more sense when talking about radar.

The ultimate misheard lyrics https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vUAaHkGpJy8&t=32

"It's all about the big, 'bout the big snow shovel."

Every girl's crazy about a sharp dressed man= every girl's crazy about his shotgun hair.

For Whom the Bell Tolls
"~~Ni**as~~ fight on the hill in the early day..." == Make his

Call Me Maybe / Carly Rae Jepsen

You took your time with the call
I took no time with the fall
You gave me nothing at all
But still, you're in my way
I beg and borrow and steal
~~Swear to Satan it's real~~ At first sight, and it's real
I didn't know I would feel it
But it's in my way

Yep. Knew it was wrong, but that's what I heard. TIL what the actual lyrics are.

Suffragette City:

"The smell of fat chicks just puts a smile on my face"

Billy Joel - She's Always a Woman

She hides like a child but she's ~~always a woman to me~~ == a weasel-woman to me

Killswitch Engage - My Curse

~~This is my curse~~

This is my purse

My aunt once told me when one of my cousins was like 4 or 5, he was singing along to Band on the Run, but saying "Hand on the rug"

What have I become my Swedish friend?