652
submitted 9 months ago by Stamets@lemmy.world to c/memes@lemmy.world
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[-] betterdeadthanreddit@lemmy.world 103 points 9 months ago

I still don't understand the red urinals, they make such a mess when you use them.

[-] assassinatedbyCIA@lemmy.world 24 points 9 months ago

They’re for faeces silly.

[-] betterdeadthanreddit@lemmy.world 23 points 9 months ago

Obviously, yeah, I'm not a moron. Still doesn't make it any less of a disaster zone once the transaction is complete.

[-] assassinatedbyCIA@lemmy.world 9 points 9 months ago

Which hand do you use to catch the turd? That might be the problem here.

[-] Dhar@lemmy.ca 7 points 9 months ago

What a terrible day to be literate

[-] Semi-Hemi-Demigod@kbin.social 6 points 9 months ago

Hey! This guy doesn't know how to use the three shells!

[-] Semi-Hemi-Demigod@kbin.social 64 points 9 months ago

Every woman I've explained this to thinks it's ridiculous. They actually choose stalls next to each other in case they need toilet paper or something.

And they talk in the bathroom. To strangers. What the hell is up with that?

[-] jadedwench@lemmy.world 14 points 9 months ago

I do not understand the whole bathroom thing either. I hate it when women try to talk to me in the bathroom. I do not understand why I have to go to the bathroom with them either and I certainly don't need a minder. I could understand maybe at a club or something if they genuinely didn't feel safe, but always just boggles my mind.

Also, fuck those overpowering auto fragrance sprayers that set my allergies off.

[-] Semi-Hemi-Demigod@kbin.social 15 points 9 months ago

We don't need male and female bathrooms. We need talking and non-talking bathrooms.

[-] blandfordforever@lemm.ee 12 points 9 months ago

I think they might feel differently if the toilets were right next to each other, with either no wall between them or a wall so short that its practically useless.

[-] DagonPie@lemmy.world 8 points 9 months ago

Or a troff. Nothing bonds two dudes more than rubbing shoulders and splashing piss on each other from backsplash from the pee wall.

[-] Got_Bent@lemmy.world 11 points 9 months ago

God I remember that at baseball games when I was a kid. Candlestick Park to be exact.

Bunch of guys lined up at the trough, beer in one hand, dick in the other, cigarette in mouth, piss all over the concrete floor.

Kids today don't know how good they have it with these divided urinals.

[-] DagonPie@lemmy.world 6 points 9 months ago

Fenway park before they redid ALL the bathrooms. Before they started doing concerts there basically. But everyones feet squeeked because of the piss all over the floors. The stalls had no doors. And it was just a troff wall. And my stepdad was just like “go find room in the line of dudes” as like a 11 year old. Basically eye level with a buncha dicks. Good times.

[-] mypasswordistaco@iusearchlinux.fyi 2 points 9 months ago

Just FYI, it's spelled trough, and pronounced like cough.

[-] DagonPie@lemmy.world 2 points 9 months ago

Thanx i hadnt a clue,

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[-] Annoyed_Crabby 48 points 9 months ago
[-] Engywuck@lemm.ee 40 points 9 months ago

It's my missing the "I use Arch, BTW".

[-] Engywuck@lemm.ee 17 points 9 months ago

Of course, I use Arch, BTW.

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[-] snooggums@kbin.social 17 points 9 months ago

They are defragging the urinals!

[-] samus12345@lemmy.world 10 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago)

At least he didn't turn to use the same urinal as the other guy. "Sword fight!"

[-] AmosBurton_ThatGuy@lemmy.ca 6 points 9 months ago

All I got is a dagger at best, take it or leave it.

[-] samus12345@lemmy.world 3 points 9 months ago

"No, I meant the pee streams, THE PEE STREAMS!!"

[-] RickMoreanus@lemmy.world 3 points 9 months ago

Well according to your theory, one of us has been doing it wrong this whole time.

[-] AmosBurton_ThatGuy@lemmy.ca 3 points 9 months ago

Oh...... I knew that

[-] taanegl@lemmy.world 5 points 9 months ago

The etiquette of pissoires must not be neglected. That's a quick way to either get decked or get slapped with a glove.

[-] threelonmusketeers@sh.itjust.works 42 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago)

I can't believe no one has posted the xkcd writeup on the International Choice of Urinal Protocol (ICUP) in this thread yet.

[-] sleep_walker@discuss.tchncs.de 3 points 9 months ago

Thanks for saving me few seconds - I needed this here!

[-] Jiggle_Physics@lemmy.world 26 points 9 months ago

There is always that one dude who walks into a bathroom, sees a row of 20 urinals with only one person using them, and goes to the one right next to him. That guy also has a tendency to turn his head to look at you and try to strike up a conversation.

[-] Gigan@lemmy.world 27 points 9 months ago

The bathroom at my work has 3 urinals. There's a guy that picks the middle one every time.

[-] Gnugit@aussie.zone 25 points 9 months ago

Gotta assert that dominance.

[-] Gigan@lemmy.world 9 points 9 months ago
[-] aubertlone@lemmy.world 4 points 9 months ago

Isn't it just closer to chaotic neutral?

What's evil about being in the middle of the urinal stalls?

Nothing I prefer to do that, just saying it's not evil.

[-] ButcherChin@lemm.ee 10 points 9 months ago

Chaotic evil would be peeing on the guy next to you.

[-] MystikIncarnate@lemmy.ca 16 points 9 months ago

Bluntly, those are not the same picture. As a dude, I see a couple of important things right away. Most importantly, there's dividers between the urinals in the second picture.

If there's room, I'll still leave a gap, but with no dividers, if there isn't room to leave a gap, depending on the spacing of the urinals, I might just want to wait until there can be a gap. With dividers, I probably won't. It's still not ideal, but dividers make it much more palatable.

[-] OneCardboardBox@lemmy.sdf.org 10 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago)

What are people's thoughts about the children's size urinal? Never use it if there's another option? Only use it if the other option would place you adjacent to another person? What about if you have a choice between adult and child's urinals next to each other, but using the child's urinal would allow space for another person to optimally avoid neighboring persons?

I feel like this is a variant of the trolley problem that's woefully unexplored.

[-] funkless_eck@sh.itjust.works 7 points 9 months ago

love it. me and my tall friends can double-decker

[-] Thcdenton@lemmy.world 2 points 9 months ago

None of the above. I'm pee shy so I piss in stalls 😁

[-] Wanderer@lemm.ee 10 points 9 months ago

Americans are funny about this. Sure you don't go next to someone if there is space but you wouldn't not use one.

I was talking a piss in a bar in America and cracked up a conversation with the guy next to me and realised he found it very unusual. I said (at the sinks) that doesn't happen here much does it? He goes no does it happen back home? I was like yea sure if you're drunk. Americans seem too worried if you're gay but who doesn't love a bit of straight guy on straight guy homoeroticism every now and then (not that pissing next to someone is).

Also trough is the best when there is a fuckload of people like at a stadium otherwise it takes for ever. The guys that use the cubical for a piss and hold everyone up are wankers. Though I once called a guy out on it at work and he said "I don't know what it is! I just can't pee around people! I've tried, it's not like I'm embarrassed. I'll show you my ddick if you want, I don't care I just can't pee next to someone." I almost pissed over myself I was laughing so much.

[-] Raiderkev@lemmy.world 9 points 9 months ago

I used to get piss shy at troughs, but I can tell you exactly why. 6 or 7 year old me was using one probably for the 1st time, and some cunt decided to say "quit looking at my dick kid!" I fuckin wasn't, but when your head is at dick height, like maybe it would appear that way. I was focused on my own dick n trying to piss, and then couldn't . Thanks to that fuck, for ~ the next 12 years of my life I was not able to squeeze a drop at a trough unless I had the corner, or ample space. Had a complex for years over it. Eventually, alcohol would solve that problem... If I'm drunk, I can piss fuckin anywhere. Now it doesn't really bother me anymore, but fuck that guy. I'm, definitely glad troughs have mostly gone the way of the dodo because of said complex, but at times when I'm at sporting events, I wouldn't mind if they still had them because men's rooms never had lines before.

[-] WashedOver@lemmy.ca 5 points 9 months ago

My new favourite is people talking on the phone while letting off absolute bomb in public washroom stalls, some even on speaker phone.

My second are those that come in playing their music on phone speaker for all of us to hear their jams.

Not sure if this is better than those that do it on a nature trails but all groups should be forced to have music speaker phone battles while bears and wolves eat them all...

[-] dingus@lemmy.world 3 points 9 months ago

Also wild to me are people that bring their drinks into public bathrooms like WTF

[-] Angry_Maple@sh.itjust.works 1 points 9 months ago

Free seasoning

[-] jol@discuss.tchncs.de 5 points 9 months ago
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[-] MalReynolds@slrpnk.net 3 points 9 months ago

This is an American thing, right? what the hell are those? i.e. context plz

[-] KnightontheSun@lemmy.world 7 points 9 months ago

Men typically do not want to urinate right next to another. The proper format is every other urinal. Men want that extra space for their own shenanigans.

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[-] Kase@lemmy.world 2 points 9 months ago

This is a little random but I just gotta get it off my chest lmao.

The other day I walked into a small restroom at school and saw two there was one stall left open. I couldn't see inside the stall, as it was parallel to the doorway I was standing in. Anyway, I walked over to the stall and nearly ran into the guy who was standing there peeing with the door open. Of course, the guy heard me approach and looked over his shoulder at me like I had two heads, and I retreated, embarrassed.

Anyway, if that guy is reading this, I'm sorry lol. Believe me, it won't happen again. You've instilled a deep fear in me and I will forever approach bathroom stalls slowly and carefully, leaning forward just enough as I approach to see if anyone is lurking inside. It won't happen again. It won't.

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this post was submitted on 24 Jan 2024
652 points (96.6% liked)

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