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I've had hemorrhoids for like 25 years, so I've always been very discerning about my toilet paper.

this entire time, I've been using whatever toilet paper I have found to be the softest as facial tissue, to blow my nose, as well. my reasoning being, if this stuff is gentle enough for my hemorrhoids, of course it's going to be gentle enough for repeated use on my upper lip.

then, a friend turns me on to one of those new "with lotion" facial tissues (my bathroom tissue always has aloe in it) and wouldn't you know it, my upper lip finds it to be softer than the toilet paper. but, when I try using it as toilet paper, my anus doesn't find it to be less irritating than the toilet paper.

why do my butthole and my upper lip think that different things are softer? is it just chemistry?

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[-] southsamurai@sh.itjust.works 147 points 4 weeks ago

Dammit, yet another question that I spent too much of my life on.

It comes down to nerves and tissue (cell, not paper) types.

The outside of your nose and the tissues of the anus are not the exact same. There's a different concentration of "nerve endings", and different types in different concentrations.

I doubt you want the full Monty of it, but if you look up the term "sensory receptors", you can do the deep dive very easily.

The short version is that we have specific types of "nerve endings" (that's what they're called colloquially, hence the quote marks, but I'll stop using those at this point). They detect pressure, temperature, pain/injury, etc.

The concentrations of them (as in how many per square inch), and the assortment of them (as in how many of each type in that square inch) varies across the entire body. The easiest way to demonstrate the relative principle is to touch your fingertip to your nose, your lips, your genitals (seriously), and your leg.

You'll find that your brain interprets the signals in an interesting way. It'll filter the less intense signals. You touch your finger to your lip, what your brain "says" is that your lips are being touched by something, and the signal from your finger takes the back seat. You touch the same fingertip to your thigh your brain says the finger is the primary sensation, and you feel the thigh via the finger rather than the finger via the thigh the way the lips worked.

Give it a try on whatever parts of your body you want. There's going to be a shifting perception of whether it's your finger touching something ( where emphasis is placed on the signals from the finger), or it'll be the section of the body being touched by the finger (signal from the touched location being emphasized).

The anus and the nose have different jobs. The anus, mostly, needs to detect pressure, injury, and some degree of chemical contact the nose needs less pressure sensitivity, but more motion sensitivity. So you'll get a different overall sensation with any given substance that's pushed against either, and when the same substance is moved across either. The difference may end up being minor. But both are sensitive enough that most people can tell a difference between paper tissue products blindfolded.

Back in the day, I wiped asses for pay. The only patients I had that couldn't tell the difference between brands of TP had medical issues that interfered with nerve signals. Do a test for yourself. Find a buddy to hand you tp or facial tissues and keep a log (heh, he said log while talking about butts). There's a very good chance that every single one will feel different. You'll probably be able to tell which brand is which if you've used that brand before.

You can probably even tell the difference with your fingers tbh. But you wouldn't likely be able to if the same products were placed or rubbed on your back

You'd also notice that different objects will feel different when just placed on an area and pressed gently into the skin vs when you wipe the area with it.

Skin is an amazing thing. It's armor, a sensor array, a biological filter, sunscreen, and a temperature regulator all in one! Plus other functions tbh, but shit like that gets overwhelming to read for a lot of people

You'd be amazed what you can discover with just an hour sitting around and touching things to parts of your body.

[-] MrsDoyle@sh.itjust.works 30 points 4 weeks ago

Oh my god! I'm sitting here touching myself like a fucking madwoman. Thank you so much! Brilliant, brilliant comment. I had no idea, how have I lived without this knowledge? Ok I'm touching myself again, this is hilarious.

[-] southsamurai@sh.itjust.works 7 points 4 weeks ago* (last edited 4 weeks ago)

Best response ever :)

[-] bitwolf@lemmy.one 16 points 4 weeks ago* (last edited 4 weeks ago)

You touch your finger to your lip, what your brain "says" is that your lips are being touched by something, and the signal from your finger takes the back seat. You touch the same fingertip to your thigh your brain says the finger is the primary sensation, and you feel the thigh via the finger rather than the finger via the thigh the way the lips worked.

This was wild to experience. Thank you for the interactive educational lesson.

If Lemmy had a c/bestof, I'd be cross-posting. Thank you southsamurai!

[-] thrawn21@lemmy.world 6 points 4 weeks ago

You're in luck, there is a best of Lemmy!

[-] TranquilTurbulence@lemmy.zip 14 points 4 weeks ago

Thanks for taking the time to write this.

Posts like this prove to me that Lemmy is ready to replace Reddit. Probably not completely true for everyone, and every topic, but we’re getting there.

[-] tilefan@lemm.ee 12 points 4 weeks ago
[-] southsamurai@sh.itjust.works 6 points 4 weeks ago

No worries ::

[-] ChexMax@lemmy.world 10 points 4 weeks ago

Thank you posting such an in depth and interesting explanation!

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[-] Interstellar_1@lemmy.blahaj.zone 7 points 4 weeks ago

This is an amazing comment! TIL, sciencey comments like these are what I most miss from reddit.

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[-] DoctorButts@kbin.melroy.org 119 points 4 weeks ago

This is the type of hard hitting content I wish we had more of around here

[-] Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world 16 points 4 weeks ago

Wha.....YOU'RE the one who should have the answers! Where did you get your medical degree???

[-] ivanafterall@lemmy.world 6 points 4 weeks ago* (last edited 4 weeks ago)

Pretty sure they went to Brown University.

[-] crank0271@lemmy.world 16 points 4 weeks ago

Paging @DoctorNoses

[-] tilefan@lemm.ee 5 points 4 weeks ago
[-] Crackhappy@lemmy.world 57 points 4 weeks ago

This may be too deep a question for a Thursday.

[-] Huckledebuck@sh.itjust.works 17 points 4 weeks ago

Nah man, just wipe the surface.

[-] Pistcow@lemm.ee 13 points 4 weeks ago

Nah, get up in them guts for hygiene sake.

[-] ExhaleSmile@lemmy.world 45 points 4 weeks ago

Get a bidet!!! No irritation, just dab dry, helps immensely.

[-] MajorMajormajormajor@lemmy.ca 65 points 4 weeks ago

I tried the bidet but it's too powerful for my nose, just felt like I was waterboarding myself. 0/10, not recommend.

[-] i_dont_want_to@lemmy.blahaj.zone 8 points 4 weeks ago

It takes some practice to perfect your toilet netipot technique.

[-] tilefan@lemm.ee 23 points 4 weeks ago

i have one! that didn't make the question in the back of my mind go away unfortunately

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[-] Fuckfuckmyfuckingass@lemmy.world 29 points 4 weeks ago* (last edited 4 weeks ago)

Rub your nose on your anus and you'll have your answer.

[-] tilefan@lemm.ee 25 points 4 weeks ago

okay, I will start taking yoga now, and get back to you once I am capable of running this test

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[-] fubo@lemmy.world 5 points 4 weeks ago

On the Internet, nobody knows you're a dog ... until you tell them.

[-] RobotZap10000@feddit.nl 4 points 4 weeks ago

Prepare to become famous after Google's LLM quotes you in a few years.

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[-] Shortstack@reddthat.com 25 points 4 weeks ago

I know it’s not the answer to your question, but you should really consider getting a bidet installed to not piss off your hemorrhoids.

Speaking from someone who also has them and who got a bidet during covid. Life changing for my cinnamon ring.

[-] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 10 points 4 weeks ago

cold, cheap bidets in the guest baths, expensive warm bidets in the master bath.

[-] angrystego@lemmy.world 6 points 4 weeks ago

There are also cheap specialized squishy water bottles with little shower-like hooked ending that can be used as a bidet if you don't want to bother with insalling a real one.

[-] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 7 points 4 weeks ago

it takes 15 minutes, $20 for all the parts, a t splitter, a wrench and teflon tape to install a bum hose if you're that hard up

[-] RisingSwell@lemmy.dbzer0.com 5 points 4 weeks ago

Presuming any kind of skill. Some of us are the kind of idiot that makes cotton wool dangerous.

[-] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 4 points 4 weeks ago

yeah sorry my FIL poured canola oil in his car ignition because his key got stuck once and was coming over to do it to mine. Like, not even WD40, which I would have expected from his generation as the all purpose lubricant. I tried to introduce him to graphite powder, but it didn't take.

I forget y'all exist sometimes.

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[-] phx@lemmy.ca 5 points 4 weeks ago

I actually just use the cold even in my own bathroom. A bit of frosty water cools the O-Ring after a meal with a biiiiit too much hot sauce, or when that slight lactose-intolerance flares up.

But the heated seat on a good quality bidet... that's amazing

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[-] Mouselemming@sh.itjust.works 22 points 4 weeks ago

Irregardless!

Don't use nose tissues as toilet paper!

They're made stronger for sneezes, not designed to "dissolve."

They'll gunk up your pipes !

[-] Default_Defect@midwest.social 12 points 4 weeks ago
[-] Mouselemming@sh.itjust.works 12 points 4 weeks ago

Oh c'mon, I just had the sudden urge to say "irregardless!" and decided not to resist it for once.

[-] erev@lemmy.world 6 points 4 weeks ago

Don't resist it, it's fun

[-] Frozengyro@lemmy.world 5 points 4 weeks ago

Unirregardlesser

[-] Nougat@fedia.io 19 points 4 weeks ago

I am going to suggest that you get a colonoscopy. My own experience with giant polyps is that they reduce the ability to evacuate fully, and make for an "it's like a marker, I just keep wiping" condition. Between the extra straining and extra filth, that can definitely be a "recipe" for hemmorhoids.

Thank you for subscribing to Butthole Facts.

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[-] AndrewZabar@lemmy.world 15 points 4 weeks ago* (last edited 4 weeks ago)

new "with lotion" facial tissues

They were new in the 1980s, just FYI. The first ones were called “Puffs Plus With Lotion”

[-] tilefan@lemm.ee 6 points 4 weeks ago

oh man time to start digging up some old TV commercials

[-] LovableSidekick@lemmy.world 14 points 4 weeks ago

Anatomy is a mystery, but I did read that if your nose runs and your feet smell, it means you're built upside down.

[-] derptastic@lemmy.nz 8 points 4 weeks ago

the skin is sensitive there. if you have a glans; its the same there as well.

[-] FuglyDuck@lemmy.world 18 points 4 weeks ago

not to mention, the 'lotion' stuff isn't going in your nose- or even remotely close to the sensitive parts of your nose.

Plenty of lotions are irritants if you use them in places they're not meant to go.

[-] Murmur@lemm.ee 6 points 4 weeks ago

Find a doctor who uses the little elastic bands to gather up the sagging anus skin making it smooth and firm again. It's a game changer.

[-] Sam_Bass@lemmy.world 6 points 4 weeks ago

anuses are desensitized by all the shit they spew

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this post was submitted on 31 Oct 2024
241 points (96.5% liked)

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