748
A Chinese official later revealed that new intelligence had told them that Trump was actually quite experienced at counting to over 100 due to the fact he is really bad at golf.
🤣
Absolute gold.
That's why he's keeping all those sycophants around, so he can count on their fingers as well as his own.
They used an AI to come up with the tariff rates. There's no actual proof that trump can count past single digits.
Hey Siri if me and the president were iron man and Dr evil what would the best tariff rates be to impose?
I kid you not, the Chinese count up to 99 on their fingers.
I can count from 0 to 255 on my fingers. I can even count up to 1023, if I include my thumbs.
Binary...
2047 if you use your dick
the bit change operation from 0 to 1 can require a bit of effort, but the sudden switch from 1 to 0 makes it worthwhile
This guy counts in tallywhackers!
Wait can you go from flaccid to erect at a moment's notice?
Pee off, pee on.
Only half that of these use your dick.
if you use a mid-state, like a halfway finger, you can count to 59048
Either your fingers are way more dextrous than mine, or your hands will look like you stepped on a live power line and it will be hard to keep the count.
Genius....
What, you don't know the powers of 2?
LOL, this is The Onion anyways, nothing to be taken too seriously here.
I do? This was just an excellent point. Never thought of counting in binary with my fingers before
Japanese as well.
Actually, he can’t count at all. He’s just discovered that lining up numbers gets a reaction, so he keeps doing it.
So did a lot of us. Don't feel too bad.
I really don't feel like his voters are part of "us".
this post was submitted on 10 Apr 2025
748 points (99.6% liked)
The Onion
5887 readers
612 users here now
The Onion
A place to share and discuss stories from The Onion, Clickhole, and other satire.
Great Satire Writing:
- The Onion
- Clickhole
- McSweeney's
- Reductress
- The Chaser
- The Hard Times
- The Needling
- Tattletale Times
- The Beaverton
founded 3 years ago
MODERATORS