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Man Dies After Secret 4-Year Battle With Gorilla (theonion.com)
submitted 2 months ago by FlyingSquid@lemmy.world to c/theonion@midwest.social
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This is one of the best Onion articles ever. Read the whole thing.

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[-] TheGiantKorean@lemmy.world 20 points 2 months ago

Also, anyone notice that this took place in Roanoke, VA? Where they're especially known for gorilla attacks?

[-] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 17 points 2 months ago

General Electric used to have a big factory in Roanoke, so I'm guessing the gorillas are a result of industrial pollution from some sort of superfund site that has yet to be cleaned up.

[-] psycho_driver@lemmy.world 18 points 2 months ago

G.E. Corporation = Gorilla Experimentation Corporation.

Wake up sheeple!

[-] bitchkat@lemmy.world 3 points 2 months ago

So being woke is good? Make up your mind!

[-] TachyonTele@lemm.ee 1 points 2 months ago

Would it be better to die from gorilla in your sleep?

[-] TheGiantKorean@lemmy.world 4 points 2 months ago

Gorilla infestations again!

this post was submitted on 09 Jan 2025
405 points (96.6% liked)

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