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[-] BaroqueInMind@piefed.social 97 points 2 months ago

Unless you are detained, physically locked into handcuffs, you can tell any cop to eat your ass instead of emptying your pockets. They have no legal authority to ask this shit unless they arrest you under reasonable suspicions.

[-] FartMaster69@lemmy.dbzer0.com 118 points 2 months ago

Unfortunately they aren’t legally obligated to eat your ass.

[-] Thedogdrinkscoffee@lemmy.ca 72 points 2 months ago

Yet. Vote for me and I'll make it the law of the land.

[-] FartMaster69@lemmy.dbzer0.com 43 points 2 months ago

Finally a politician who supports my interests.

[-] Thedogdrinkscoffee@lemmy.ca 21 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Cop 1: * Bang Bang Bang!

"We have a warrant to search the premises for contraband."

Homeowner: "Let me see that warrant. Ok seems in order."

*undoes belt, drops pants, assumes the position. "READY? START EATIN'!"

Cop 2: "This jobs got it's ups and downs that's for sure.

*eats ass with gusto

Cop 1: "Fucking perv!"

[-] hunkyburrito@lemmy.zip 25 points 2 months ago

Is it bad that I interpreted the "bang bang bang" as Cop 1 shooting a gun at first

[-] aeternum@lemmy.blahaj.zone 21 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

i... just realised they WEREN'T shooting, because of your comment.

[-] Thedogdrinkscoffee@lemmy.ca 3 points 2 months ago

Normal if you are an American.

[-] X@piefed.world 4 points 2 months ago

Doing the work of the people, you got my vote.

[-] GeneralDingus@lemmy.cafe 9 points 2 months ago
[-] Kolanaki@pawb.social 8 points 2 months ago

We should add that change in with all the other police reformation that should happen.

[-] bobs_monkey@lemmy.zip 3 points 2 months ago

You could always hand them a spoon, but your results may vary

[-] FartMaster69@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 2 months ago

This works best if you complain about your constipation in a sultry voice.

[-] bobs_monkey@lemmy.zip 2 points 2 months ago

Thank you fartmaster

[-] diffaldo@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 2 months ago

Happy cake day!

[-] enchantedgoldapple@sopuli.xyz 1 points 2 months ago

Happy cake day!

[-] Sphks@jlai.lu 45 points 2 months ago

This is a great way to get detained, physically locked into handcuffs and not being able anymore to tell any cop to eat your ass.

[-] Wren@lemmy.today 14 points 2 months ago

Not in Canada, depending on how white and employed you look.

[-] Typotyper@sh.itjust.works 2 points 2 months ago

Explain... More to the detained than the white part

[-] Wren@lemmy.today 2 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Insulting the cops is protected by the charter under freedom of expression. The cops have to be nicer to us (in theory) then we have to be to them.

[-] Venat0r@lemmy.world 15 points 2 months ago

"reasonable suspicion": telling the cop to eat your ass 😅

[-] BaroqueInMind@piefed.social 5 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Correct me if im wrong. Doesnt the USA has freedoms of speech? You can actually tell a cop to eat your ass without consequence unless the cop is a smooth-brain dipshit.

[-] hemko@lemmy.dbzer0.com 31 points 2 months ago

unless the cop is a smooth-brain dipshit

Believe or not, this is a requirement to become a cop

[-] affenlehrer@feddit.org 6 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Believe or not, jail, right away. We have the best patients in the world because of jail.

[-] Venat0r@lemmy.world 3 points 2 months ago

yeah that's why I put it in the quotation marks. Just because it's a cops job to enforce the law, doesn't mean they know the law 😅

[-] PrincessTardigrade@lemmy.world 2 points 2 months ago

My friend from highschool said she was driving with her little brother in the passenger seat, and he apparently flipped off a cop. She told me the cop actually pulled her over and wrote her a ticket. This was a long time ago so I have no way of knowing what the ticket was for, or if this friend was telling the truth, fwiw. However, it's always been my impression that cops can make up some BS charge if they want, and then it's basically your word vs that of a cop *

  • Unless you have a good lawyer
[-] BaroqueInMind@piefed.social 2 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Cops can issue citations, but judges ultimately decide if they are bullshit or not. Cops do not have the authority to make the law up, they only interpret it and enforce it. If you convince a judge that you only got ticketed for a middle-finger and prove it, you are cleared. Sounds like they got the attention of a cop and the cop followed them until they saw them actually break a law.

[-] PotatoesFall@discuss.tchncs.de 12 points 2 months ago

Let me guess, you're from the US?

[-] BaroqueInMind@piefed.social 5 points 2 months ago
[-] PotatoesFall@discuss.tchncs.de 10 points 2 months ago

Ah damn I stand corrected. You didn't say where you're from and just explained as if it were universally true everywhere. Kind of a US-Defaultism thing.

[-] FishFace@piefed.social 11 points 2 months ago

Let's not make such sweeping generalisations.

For example, in the UK, the police have the legal power to search you if the have reasonable grounds to suspect that you have something on you in a few categories, like drugs. There are even (yet more controversial) powers to search people just because they're in a specific area (though there are restrictions on why an area can be so designated). You don't need to be arrested or handcuffed for this, although you might be.

[-] redparadise@lemmygrad.ml 6 points 2 months ago

As if the police care about the consequences of police overreach or physical coercion

[-] Telodzrum@lemmy.world 2 points 2 months ago

Nah, Terry Stops have been given additional reach and breadth at every opportunity.

[-] MinorLaceration@lemmy.world 1 points 2 months ago

If you are only detained, the officer can pay down the outside of your clothing to check for weapons if there is reason to believe you may be armed. They cannot search you without your consent unless it is incident to lawful arrest. Regardless of the situation, the correct thing to do is to state that you do not consent to any searches or seizures. If they officer actually has the authority to search you, they will. If they search you unlawfully, anything they find is subject to suppression in court.

Deny them consent to search, but do not physically resist if they do. And do not answer questions without a lawyer.

[-] lauha@lemmy.world 1 points 2 months ago

These are really bad advices unless you define where you are from because the laws differ in different countries and what police can and cannot do is different.

this post was submitted on 06 Dec 2025
562 points (93.4% liked)

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