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[-] badcommandorfilename@lemmy.world 87 points 1 year ago

Human: I want to drink alcohol

[-] BruceTwarzen@kbin.social 74 points 1 year ago

I will make you sick and turn you into an unlikable blob.

You don't understand how funny i am when i'm drunk.

You pissed yourself the other night.

I'm sooooo funny i swear

[-] TexasDrunk@lemmy.world 35 points 1 year ago

I'll have to know I have no memory of pissing myself so you can't prove that happened.

[-] Crank_it@lemmy.world 6 points 1 year ago

Sorry. That was me

[-] Spendrill@lemm.ee 12 points 1 year ago

See, the thing that has got it all fucked up now is mobile phones.

Soooo glad the worst of my antics were before everyone had a Livestream capable camcorder in their pocket.

[-] lugal@lemmy.ml 31 points 1 year ago

I think that's a bad example because alcohol develops when sugar is half digested by microorganisms. Not sure about the details but alcohol isn't "actively" added to fruits by the plant. The plant wants you to eat the fruit and shit the stone into the woods. Alcohol is a byproduct nobody intended.

Better examples are caffeine, hotness in chili, ...

ok :)

Human: I eat bad fruit

yeast n shit in the fruit: nooo what are you doing we're already eating this!

Human: taste bad!

Yeast n shit: Ya bro that is like literally our shit n waste

Human: ooh i feel funny n good!

Yeast n shit: are you listening to me?

Human: haha fun! grabs another rotten peach

Yeast:...............

[-] variants@possumpat.io 15 points 1 year ago

Human: this yeast shit is so good we should put yeast in our grape juice, potatoes, barbecue sauce and boil all the water out of it

Government: oh no you don't, not unless you pay us money to do that

Human: but I'm not selling it

Government: M O N E Y!

[-] TranscendentalEmpire@lemm.ee 12 points 1 year ago

The plant wants you to eat the fruit and shit the stone into the woods. Alcohol is a byproduct nobody intended.

Can't remember exactly what tree it is, but there's a rainforest tree that's almost entirely pollinated by drunk little monkeys. The monkeys are specifically attracted to the pollen with the highest alcohol content.

[-] MonkderZweite@feddit.ch 1 points 1 year ago

Wasn't that a hoax of some doku tv?

[-] SeabassDan@lemmy.world 9 points 1 year ago

What's the apparent evolutionary purpose for developing caffeine?

[-] Ross_audio@lemmy.world 11 points 1 year ago

A really bitter tasting pesticide essentially.

Us mammals coming along recently has changed some things.

[-] tigeruppercut@lemmy.zip 7 points 1 year ago

Or hot peppers...

Peppers: Mammals no eat, only birds!

Humans: Hold my rotten peach, I'ma set my tongue on fire lolz

[-] Duranie@literature.cafe 2 points 1 year ago

Roasty caffeine ๐Ÿ˜. Mmmmmm...

[-] BakerBagel@midwest.social 7 points 1 year ago

Same as nicotine. It keeps insects away

Iirc it slows down a type of caterpillars who eat the leaves and makes them smell yummier to predators but i don't remember where i saw it

[-] lugal@lemmy.ml 6 points 1 year ago

That's a good question tbh. If I remember correctly, the effects on other animals (was it insects?) is very different from ours.

[-] Dhs92@programming.dev 6 points 1 year ago

It's toxic to insects, so it's a natural pesticide iirc

[-] Dasnap@lemmy.world 6 points 1 year ago
[-] sirico@feddit.uk 3 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Kola also archives this with Leaf

this post was submitted on 08 Mar 2024
906 points (98.1% liked)

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