419
Plants (slrpnk.net)
submitted 1 month ago by Track_Shovel@slrpnk.net to c/memes@slrpnk.net
top 17 comments
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[-] RizzoTheSmall@lemm.ee 31 points 1 month ago

Ah, it's that beautiful time of year again when my body violently rejects the very atmosphere itself due to all the pretty plants jizzing wildly and frantically into the air..

[-] Byakhee@lemmy.world 9 points 1 month ago

Damned botanical bukakke

[-] Asafum@feddit.nl 27 points 1 month ago

My body: WE'RE UNDER ATTACK!!! SNEEZE! I SAID SNEEZE DAMNIT! TURN THAT NOSE INTO A FAUCET! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!

[-] RedSnt@feddit.dk 12 points 1 month ago

Lilacs are in bloom here and I've been stopping on my bike to get my nose into those flowers as often as possible. Probably my favorite flower scent.

[-] WorldsDumbestMan@lemmy.today 2 points 1 month ago

Yea boy! Get your nose in there!

[-] pinball_wizard@lemmy.zip 10 points 1 month ago

It's weird to think about how I will never be involved in as much human sex as I have been involved (by randomly walking in the middle of) random plant sex. We humans just don't do sex aggressively enough to keep up.

[-] dzsimbo@lemm.ee 2 points 1 month ago

You're telling me you don't hide in the brush and jerk off onto random hikers?

[-] pinball_wizard@lemmy.zip 2 points 1 month ago

Not as much as plants do anyway...

[-] tacosanonymous@lemm.ee 10 points 1 month ago

Like many other species on this earth, they have a mechanism that helps them survive but humans decided it was a good reason to murder them and put their corpses on display.

[-] wolfyvegan@slrpnk.net 7 points 1 month ago

And let's not forget those delicious ovaries! Sweet, juicy, engorged ovaries... Yum! 😋

[-] Evil_Shrubbery@lemm.ee 3 points 1 month ago

If y'all ain't doing the first bit & people around you aren't doing the second bit - you are doing it wrong.

[-] Stache_@lemmy.ml 3 points 1 month ago

I throw my stamen in the air sometimes. Screamin’ AAYYOOO! This pollen’s ready to go!

[-] MadMadBunny@lemmy.ca 2 points 1 month ago

That’s what she said!

[-] Meron35@lemmy.world 2 points 1 month ago

Humans: imma wave my genitals in the air Also Humans: mmm fragrant

[-] WorldsDumbestMan@lemmy.today 1 points 1 month ago

I mean, in some cases. But, I think there is a reason you are supposed to focus especially on washing them.

[-] qevlarr@lemmy.world 1 points 1 month ago

ACHOO!

Fuck them polls in the air...

this post was submitted on 17 May 2025
419 points (99.3% liked)

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