106
The More You Know! (hexbear.net)
submitted 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) by coeliacmccarthy@hexbear.net to c/chapotraphouse@hexbear.net

Cumhammer 2K23: in the grim darkness of the present, there is only cum

all 36 comments
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[-] AbbysMuscles@hexbear.net 55 points 1 year ago

Why not just like jerk off into a tube before you're deployed? I truly don't get it

[-] MerryChristmas@hexbear.net 29 points 1 year ago

Then you're taking away jobs from the hardworking IDF spunk collectors.

[-] GhostSpider@hexbear.net 20 points 1 year ago

They may run the risk of having to abide to this pesky thing called consent.

[-] jabrd@hexbear.net 11 points 1 year ago

Yea that parts insane to me. If they wanted to have their sperm frozen in case they died, they'd have done it. Just fucking desecrating the corpse

[-] MaxOS@hexbear.net 47 points 1 year ago
[-] SorosFootSoldier@hexbear.net 45 points 1 year ago

bzzzt zapping ya prostate with 50k volts of pure apartheid energy, cum to me my brood

[-] Tankiedesantski@hexbear.net 19 points 1 year ago

Sigh unzips

[-] FlakesBongler@hexbear.net 43 points 1 year ago

There was an episode of Law & Order: SVU where a woman used this to get pregnant with rich men's semen (she'd drug them first) and then sue them for child support and then abandon the kid somewhere

Yeah, it's Law & Order, you're not gonna get anything decent out of it

[-] glans@hexbear.net 8 points 1 year ago

and there was the episode of Voyager when Seska stole Chakotay's jizz to impreggers herself (or said she did, I could never follow the arc)

[-] Tofu_Lewis@hexbear.net 5 points 1 year ago

She stole some of his DNA which was enough to impregnate herself (supposedly), but when she gave birth it was actually half-Cardassian half-Kazon because she was shacking up with Maj Kulla of the Kazon Nistrum. No ultrasounds in the Delta Quadrant (well apparently the Traibe ships that the Kazon appropriated don't have them?).

[-] EmmaGoldman@hexbear.net 39 points 1 year ago

How long til this becomes a bdsm tool?

[-] coeliacmccarthy@hexbear.net 56 points 1 year ago

negative several decades, it's a thing

[-] EmmaGoldman@hexbear.net 31 points 1 year ago
[-] gaycomputeruser@hexbear.net 22 points 1 year ago

Yeah, I've been toying with building one. If y'all are curious it's called electrostim.

[-] glans@hexbear.net 10 points 1 year ago

tens 7000 ftw it's like $20. don't mess around with "building" (spare radio?) any of that shit you can kill yourself if you do it wrong

[-] SpiderFarmer@hexbear.net 7 points 1 year ago

It's why I kinda hate the term "stimming". Just makes me wanna get a Violet Wand, ya know?

[-] SootySootySoot@hexbear.net 29 points 1 year ago

Did these people even consent to it?

[-] ikilledtheradiostar@hexbear.net 36 points 1 year ago

Per 5th edition rules corpses count as objects so consent is only needed for resurrection spells.

[-] ElChapoDeChapo@hexbear.net 17 points 1 year ago

DM: "Isn't there someone you forgot to ask?"

[-] hexaflexagonbear@hexbear.net 27 points 1 year ago
[-] nat_turner_overdrive@hexbear.net 26 points 1 year ago

can't figure out how to make this into a joke, so here's the punchline: dead nuts accurate

[-] Evilphd666@hexbear.net 25 points 1 year ago

When I grow up I want to be....

[-] UmbraVivi@hexbear.net 25 points 1 year ago

Imagine if Hamas did this. What would the media call it? "Barbaric"? "removed"? "Fanatic"?

I don't think I have the right adjective but I just know they'd go haywire over it.

[-] NuraShiny@hexbear.net 8 points 1 year ago

Meanwhile half the internet would go UWU

[-] envis10n@hexbear.net 24 points 1 year ago

Project Necrocummies

[-] bubbalu@hexbear.net 22 points 1 year ago

where could i acquire such a device? asking for a friend...

[-] Catradora_Stalinism@hexbear.net 20 points 1 year ago

i vote to burn all such samples, I feel like the ingredients for another being shouldn't be grown from fascist corpses, the living are fine enough.

[-] invalidusernamelol@hexbear.net 19 points 1 year ago
[-] LENINSGHOSTFACEKILLA@hexbear.net 12 points 1 year ago

i cant even tell if this is real

[-] TheDialectic@hexbear.net 11 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

It's evolution. If you die in defence of a settler colonial state your genes shouldn't get to pass on

[-] bubbalu@hexbear.net 7 points 1 year ago

really really awful but also as a Jewish person with a genetic disorder I get it from a scientific perspective.

[-] GreenTeaRedFlag@hexbear.net 5 points 1 year ago
this post was submitted on 15 Nov 2023
106 points (100.0% liked)

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