Bit Idea: Come up with fake names for Democratic party policies (hexbear.net)

submitted 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) by Infamousblt@hexbear.net to c/chapotraphouse@hexbear.net

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And then others in the thread comment with what they think that policy actually do. For example, we can use a fake policy name of the Greener Emissions Act, but the actual policy text just makes it illegal to fart any color other than green.

I think using this bit idea we can probably come up with better policies than the Democratic party has. I think I probably already have. Just feeling inspired by all the Dems talking big game about all of the Big Fancy Named Policies that Biden has implemented before election, because their names are hilarious and then what they do is even funnier. I think we can do better.

Also I'll do the same bit later for Republican party policy names so don't steal my bit or I'll be honestly not even slightly annoyed I don't own bits you can do it if you want

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[-] Parsani@hexbear.net 13 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

People's Protection Bill

[-] Infamousblt@hexbear.net 5 points 11 months ago

An instant classic

[-] asg101@hexbear.net 12 points 11 months ago

Name: The Freedom and Prosperity for All Act.

Actual Policy: Outlaw any online criticism of the government or the oligarchs that own it, make sure off-shore tax evasion account holders are never identified or prosecuted. In other words, just keep carrying on as usual.

[-] Infamousblt@hexbear.net 8 points 11 months ago

I'm pretty sure they already enacted this one, or tried to enact this one, under the guise of "protecting children." Which I always think is kinda telling on themselves a bit when they use that excuse.

[-] asg101@hexbear.net 2 points 11 months ago

I'm pretty sure they already enacted this one,

yep : In other words, just keep carrying on as usual.

[-] AFineWayToDie@hexbear.net 11 points 11 months ago

Name: Eternal Support and Solidarity With Unions Act

Policy: Like it sounds but only police unions.

[-] Infamousblt@hexbear.net 5 points 11 months ago

Only police are workers, acktchually!!

[-] SwitchyWitchyandBitchy@hexbear.net 8 points 11 months ago

Freedom for women act: literally just more female drone pilots but still no codified roe v wade.

[-] EmmaGoldman@hexbear.net 4 points 11 months ago

The new Freedom for Women Act expands mandatory selective service registration to women and others. Congress had previously stalled for four and a half months over the bill, as Democrats demand that the bill include diverse gender identities. The final wording chosen is "all citizens," rather than the explicit enumeration of identities, a compromise for which Republicans were assured votes in favor of two constitutional amendments rescinding the right to vote from non-landowners and barring immigration/emigration.

[-] Infamousblt@hexbear.net 2 points 11 months ago

Free as in a bird, to fly, a drone, that strikes a civilian. Not free as in beer.

[-] Deadend@hexbear.net 7 points 11 months ago

Name: Legal Weed.

Act: weed is still illegal but enforcement is selective. Mandatory minimum laws are still in place.

[-] Infamousblt@hexbear.net 3 points 11 months ago

Selective enforcement based on the Law Enforcement Officers discretion that the specific person using the weed at that moment poses a Clear and Present Threat to thesmelves or others. Yes, I can see this fitting into volcel-kamala 's policy book for sure