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[-] Jorgelino@lemmy.ml 73 points 10 months ago

Programmer here. Can confirm. Coding is just a list of instructions we send to the tiny people inside so they know what to do.

[-] Socsa@sh.itjust.works 45 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

Electrical Engineer here. Electrons are people too! Very tiny, quantum people, with very tiny, quantum hopes, and very tiny, quantum dreams!

Science cannot disprove this.

[-] Got_Bent@lemmy.world 11 points 10 months ago

I hear electrons are really flaky. You tell them to show up at a specific place and time, and you just never know. Always getting involved in one entanglement or another.

[-] Mamertine@lemmy.world 32 points 10 months ago

It's frustrating because they're so literal when following instructions. I wish they'd do what I want, not what I said.

[-] Lemminary@lemmy.world 15 points 10 months ago

The trick is to say what you mean ☝🤓

[-] WhiskyTangoFoxtrot@lemmy.world 7 points 10 months ago

They don't always listen, though.

[-] RizzRustbolt@lemmy.world 14 points 10 months ago

That's why I'm constantly shoving cookies into the case. So the computer gnomes are happy.

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[-] ElderWendigo@sh.itjust.works 61 points 10 months ago

I say that computers work because we tricked some rocks into thinking by carving special runes into them.

[-] Saltblue@lemmy.world 33 points 10 months ago

It's not that magic doesn't exist, it's just that our current spells and rituals are rudimentary.

[-] captainlezbian@lemmy.world 8 points 10 months ago

I’d say it’s that the information on how it works is out there and not secret. If I want to turn lead into gold that knowledge is available to me, I just need access to a nuclear reactor and to learn a fuck ton of stuff.

Also the fact that it’s all very math dependent doesn’t help. The “when will I use this” subject is the biggest prerequisite to magic

[-] nugmeister64@lemmy.world 9 points 10 months ago

funnily far more true than many might believe

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[-] negativenull@startrek.website 45 points 10 months ago

The smoke that comes out of computers sometimes is caused by the little people getting pissed off and lighting little fires out of protest.

[-] match@pawb.social 24 points 10 months ago

Oh no! The tiny people in the computer are French

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[-] EfreetSK@lemmy.world 33 points 10 months ago

Haha what? There are no small people in computers, what are you talking about?

sweats

[-] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 23 points 10 months ago

Found the small person.

[-] BeigeAgenda@lemmy.ca 31 points 10 months ago

Education and wisdom are two separate stats, this guy didn't roll very high on Wis.

[-] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 20 points 10 months ago

In the U.S., education is mostly about being able to regurgitate what you've been told. Wisdom is, as you suggested, not necessary for that.

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[-] EatYouWell@lemmy.world 27 points 10 months ago

Who wants to bet he's just a Helpdesk tech and has no idea what an actual computer engineer is?

[-] Mamertine@lemmy.world 18 points 10 months ago

I'm a data engineer and I have no idea what a computer engineer is.

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[-] Wogi@lemmy.world 25 points 10 months ago

I am a tool and die maker and I affirm that heart attacks are caused by tiny, airborne sharks that sound exactly like Steven Crowder on helium. When you breathe them in they go to your heart and literally attack it.

[-] SuperSaiyanSwag@lemmy.zip 23 points 10 months ago

I’m just a medical student, but as a computer engineer can’t he just hack into the mainframe and reveal that the earth is flat?

[-] satans_crackpipe@lemmy.world 8 points 10 months ago

That would require multiple monitors and rave music.

[-] Lemminary@lemmy.world 8 points 10 months ago

You can just dig all the way down to bedrock, right? Should be easy if you kill all the creeps and spiders

[-] Thcdenton@lemmy.world 22 points 10 months ago

Do the little people have pointy hats?

[-] SuddenDownpour@sh.itjust.works 19 points 10 months ago

Get him! Get the geologist and silence him! He's unveiled the truth and now they'll take our tiny people away from us!

[-] Lemminary@lemmy.world 7 points 10 months ago

Probably working for Big Geology and the mainstream media!

[-] captainlezbian@lemmy.world 17 points 10 months ago
[-] jank1@links.hackliberty.org 14 points 10 months ago

the response fits perfectly 👌

[-] MacNCheezus@lemmy.today 13 points 10 months ago

No, computers work because there are very tiny rocks inside that vibrate when connected to electricity.

[-] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 12 points 10 months ago

Don't bring your so-called science mumbo-jumbo around here!

[-] NaibofTabr@infosec.pub 10 points 10 months ago

I trapped lightning in a rock, and taught it to do math.

Computers are arcane wizardry.

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[-] Zoomboingding@lemmy.world 11 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

Inside every computer there's a little person

A very wholesome and talented person

And he loves you

This is his song

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[-] victorz@lemmy.world 10 points 10 months ago

At least he used "affirm" rather than "confirm".

[-] superduperenigma@lemmy.world 7 points 10 months ago

What's up with all the boxes around the text?

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[-] elephantium@lemmy.world 7 points 10 months ago

Reach inside your computer to discover the shocking truth...

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this post was submitted on 22 Dec 2023
1336 points (99.3% liked)

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