to be fair, the pictured does look like a terrible version of a pineapple in pizza.

The biggest issue is the pie having too much water content. You need to drain and press dry the line apple or it will turn into a soupy mess. Also, rings are 100% not the way to go. Need to slice those bad boys up into smaller pieces. Also pineapple does something special to the flavor of mottzarella.

My barometer for a pizza place is a jalapeno pineapple, do fight me if you don't think pineapple belongs on pizza.

This is your reminder that Hawaiian Pizza was invented by a Greek immigrant in an Italian restaurant in Canada.

It's good, but remember it doesn't mean you have to have it on every pizza forever. It blends nicely with jalapenos and white onion to give a sweet and spicy taste, but I wouldn't put it on a veggie lovers or meat lovers.

Most importantly, no one is making you eat it. If someone else likes it, fuck off and let them enjoy it. This reminds me of the "no ketchup on hotdogs" people. Just let people like what they like.

I like pineapple pizza. I also dunk my fries in milkshake. When I'm feeling hungry I'll open a ton of sardines and just go heavy on those salty fuckers right there over the sink. And I'm ashamed of none of these things.

very important article about how italian food snobbery is completely made up: https://www.ft.com/content/6ac009d5-dbfd-4a86-839e-28bb44b2b64c

In this same house, in the 1980s, Nonna Fiore once served some English guests lasagna, per my uncle’s request. The lasagna was cooked from frozen, her story goes. Life was busy and, anyway, she had no qualms about serving a supermarket ready meal; people could only dream of such a luxury during the war. None of the guests suspected that she hadn’t made it from scratch and everyone was delighted, her Italian son included. She reminds me of this, then looks up at me and winks.

I have a hard time believing most Italians would even consider this as pizza.

Memetic warfare

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I try to give fans of Hawaiian pizza the benefit of the doubt. I say that apparently I’ve never had Hawaiian pizza done right. To me, it just tastes like a decent pizza… that somebody decided to add fruit to, for some incomprehensible reason. I’ll laugh at myself and change the topic.

Do you insist on steering the topic back? Want to lecture me on how great “salty and sweet” is? Okay, fine. I’ll suggest putting Twizzlers on there. Or m&m’s. Is that nauseating? Do you think those flavors and/or textures don’t work well on pizza? NEITHER DOES PINEAPPLE, YOU STUBBORN, BORING PIZZA SNOB. SHUT UP ALREADY.

Two factions: those who hate it, and those who are wrong.

Add some vegan meat and people will riot.

I am glad nothing else in the world is going on so that we can afford to think important issues such as company trying a variation on pizza in a mature market with many options to consumers.

Looks like it's time for Vesuvius to erupt again.

I thought I knew which side of this argument I was on until I saw the picture.

As far as pineapple on pizza goes, I am firmly Team [LOREM IPSUM] and absolutely will 1v1 anyone irl over it.