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Can I lick it? (mander.xyz)
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[-] dojan@lemmy.world 120 points 2 years ago

I wanted to tell a joke here, but all the good jokes argon.

[-] dohpaz42@lemmy.world 69 points 2 years ago

That was such a noble thing to admit.

[-] lseif@sopuli.xyz 36 points 2 years ago

it didnt get a reaction out of me

[-] dohpaz42@lemmy.world 20 points 2 years ago

You could say you were inert to my attempt at humor.

[-] Skanky@lemmy.world 17 points 2 years ago

The original joke was pure Gold, but these later ones are just Boron me

[-] NotSpez@lemm.ee 10 points 2 years ago
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[-] pruwybn@discuss.tchncs.de 110 points 2 years ago

We can't lick sodium or chlorine, but combine them and you get something we literally make blocks of for the purpose of licking. What a world!

[-] Allero@lemmy.today 34 points 2 years ago

One is bad in one way and the other is bad in the opposite way.

Neutralize!

[-] Reddfugee42@lemmy.world 21 points 2 years ago

Remind your cousin Becky about this when she starts going on about mercury compounds in vaccines

[-] randomthin2332@lemmy.world 14 points 2 years ago

This is like the nile red videos where hes like "plastic gloves are essentially grape fruit" and then proceeds to make it.

[-] brian@lemmy.ml 74 points 2 years ago

But does this imply licking it in a "lickable" state? I have a hard time imagining licking a gas, and licking hydrogen as a liquid at -250 C or so sounds, not great.

[-] wahming 43 points 2 years ago

Depending on the quantity and the leidenfrost effect, you might be fine

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[-] Simon@lemmy.dbzer0.com 57 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)

That's hilarious because me and my brother licked lead fishing weights for fun as a child. It's probably why I'm retarded.

Can someone make one for suitability as dildo material?

Edit: Here it is, chumps

[-] threelonmusketeers@sh.itjust.works 10 points 2 years ago

How is bromine "probably fine"? It should be in the rectal damage section.

Calcium should probably be in the "Ow, my ass" section.

[-] Simon@lemmy.dbzer0.com 12 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)

There are a bunch wrong. Feel free to go crazy with it.

Edit: NEW VERSION IS UP Yay

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[-] olutukko@lemmy.world 8 points 2 years ago

awesome contribution

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[-] xkforce@lemmy.world 45 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)

Lithium, Sodium etc. need to be upped to "please reconsider." Calcium and all the lanthanides are also metals I would not advise licking because theyre very reactive. Promethium is especially dangerous due to its radioactivity with its longest lived isotope having a half life of around 17 years. So not only is it reactive, youd die to the radiation too.

[-] atomicorange@lemmy.world 12 points 2 years ago

Lithium is just gonna be a little fizzy like pop rocks. No explosions, thankfully. The LiOH produced would not be fun for you, but probably won’t hurt anyone else.

[-] xkforce@lemmy.world 8 points 2 years ago

Lithium salts are used to treat bipolar. The metal isnt just reacting with the water on your tongue to create a very strong base (and lots of heat), you are also going to be ingesting that Lithium (as a lithium soap as it reacts with oils and fats) which can have different (unpleasant) effects on you depending on how much was ingested. If your kidney function is impaired, it gets worse.

[-] nickwitha_k@lemmy.sdf.org 35 points 2 years ago

Please don't lick elemental hydrogen.

[-] thegreenguy@sopuli.xyz 7 points 2 years ago

Out of curiosity, what would happen if you do?

[-] nickwitha_k@lemmy.sdf.org 19 points 2 years ago

In the hypothetical, if one were able to lick elemental hydrogen in its atomic, rather than molecular form, it would have a few potential effects. The one that would concern me most would be its aggressive reactivity, ripping hydrogens away from anything that it could in order to achieve stability. This would potentially cause tissue damage both from the deprotonation and shift in pH.

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[-] Arcity@feddit.nl 11 points 2 years ago

Nothing, because you can have only one atom of it. Multiple will just form molecular hydrogen H2. That one hydrogen atom will aggressively rip of another hydrogen of a molecule of water for example, but it won't be noticeable.

[-] FilthyShrooms@lemmy.world 31 points 2 years ago

I'd bump up cesium, rubidium, and probably potassium to "please reconsider", as I would not want to stand near you

[-] ilinamorato@lemmy.world 26 points 2 years ago

A decent chunk of these are "how would you even?" and a few others are "you're doing it right now."

[-] plinky@hexbear.net 22 points 2 years ago

Licks calcium one time hahaha

[-] lledrtx@lemmy.world 21 points 2 years ago
[-] Reddfugee42@lemmy.world 13 points 2 years ago

It's literally medicine in small doses

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[-] PervServer@lemmynsfw.com 21 points 2 years ago

Lick my As! You chemists can't stop me from slobbering on every element.

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[-] IndiBrony@lemmy.world 20 points 2 years ago

Yes you can!

[-] mlg@lemmy.world 19 points 2 years ago

Instructions unclear for isotopes

What if I want to lick U-235?

[-] pete_the_cat@lemmy.world 18 points 2 years ago

But Lead tastes so good!

I wonder what metallic Sodium tastes like...

[-] becausechemistry@lemm.ee 20 points 2 years ago

It tastes like hot hydrogen gas (that will quickly mix with oxygen and taste like superheated steam).

If that doesn’t get ya, it would taste like sodium hydroxide, and also soap. (The soap is from the hydroxide turning the fats in your cells into soap.)

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[-] bahbah23@lemmy.world 15 points 2 years ago

It tastes like pain.

[-] mathterdark@lemmy.world 17 points 2 years ago

Can I lick it?

Green - yes, you can!

Yellow, Red, Purple - no, you can’t!

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[-] deus@lemmy.world 17 points 2 years ago

They're all lickable, it's just that some you can only lick once.

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[-] Wilzax@lemmy.world 17 points 2 years ago

I think licking pure uranium is worse for your health than licking pure chlorine gas

[-] Liz@midwest.social 15 points 2 years ago

I think the assumption with the chlorine is that you end up inhaling it and dying fairly quickly. Licking uranium isn't a great idea, but you might not ever have noticable effects, even long term, if very little comes off onto your tongue. I know people who have accidently tasted plutonium in solution.

[-] southsamurai@sh.itjust.works 15 points 2 years ago

I dunno, if that gasses are in a state where they're able to be licked, they'd mess you up pretty bad

[-] bdonvr@thelemmy.club 14 points 2 years ago

I'd say downgrade Mercury to yellow. Licking Mercury won't hurt you as long as you hold your breath.

Having it close to your breathy parts is always not a great idea though.

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[-] doubtingtammy@lemmy.ml 13 points 2 years ago

I'm gonna lick Ununennium and you can't stop me

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[-] bahbah23@lemmy.world 9 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)

I would avoid licking zinc. It's a necessary nutrient but it doesn't take much to mess your stomach up.

[-] ursakhiin@beehaw.org 9 points 2 years ago

My lead sandwich is calling to me

[-] Someonelol@lemmy.dbzer0.com 23 points 2 years ago
[-] Emmie@lemm.ee 6 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)

I always wanted to play with bromine. It looks so cool.

Why all the coolest things have to be toxic 😞 (broad life wisdom statement)

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this post was submitted on 22 Apr 2024
840 points (99.2% liked)

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