Almost 2 weeks with no caffeine. Although I’m sleeping the same number of hours, I’m sleeping more soundly and dreaming more. I wake up very well rested without a dull headache prompting me to start some coffee. My energy level is more stable throughout the day, especially in the evening after work.

I do miss drinking coffee, and eventually I’ll probably get back into decaf. But right now, feeling healthy has made the prospect of a cup of coffee unappealing; which is good.

Apart from this, I started taking my study of Finnish more seriously. Learning a second language always seemed to be something I’m not capable of, but I’m getting past that mental block. Sounds kind of lame but it’s making me realize how many things of similar difficulty I have learned over the years, and they felt easy because I wasn’t worried about when I would become a master. Thinking career wise but also certain games and sports that I have spent years practicing. I just have to keep that attitude for language, and not worry about mastery.

Got a job interview for tomorrow, pretty sure I only got it cause the place has a shortage and I got a pulse but hell it's something. Now I just gotta make sure I don't let anxiety screw it up I'll go into like a already failed and let my wit, charm and ability to lift and pass a drug test carry me.

The week is off to a good start, did some meditation, reading and running today

Do you want to share something you've done in the previous week? Everything counts, nothing is too small.

• I finish one of my big programming projects this week. Very pleased that it was successful, I'm really feeling like all of this coding on my own is going to pay off I just keep my mind focused on progression rather than "success". Just constantly getting better, even a little bit is all that matters to me in this endeavor.

Do you have any goals or plans for next week?

• Apply for jobs. Call one of my boyz and let know I love him and if he needs anything he can hit me up no problem. Find a new book to read, preferably something funny. I need to laugh. I also started using Kettlebells I found at a moving sale for $10. I have not used in exercise before but I'm looking to switch things up.

Do you have any streaks? For example, "sober for one day." Feel free to post your streak every day in this thread.

• Still maintaining my walking and bodyweight exercises. I'm glad to see the fat coming off in places.

If you don't have a continuous streak, did you manage to abstain from something for a day or more?

• One major thing I'm very proud is that even though a lot of things in my personal life have gone sideways, is that I don't feel like I'm bugging out about it. I certainly care want things to be better, but I'm not tripping either. To use more adult terms, I'm having a more stoic (in the philosophical good sense, not the hustlebro sense) response. I'm working on the things I can, not worrying about the things I can't, and trying to be proactive in all the ways I can. I'm letting that be enough too, I'm doing my best in the ways I can and I am satisfied with that. Things aren't going well, but I'm doing my best in all the ways I can and that's a dub in my book.

Did you come across some useful information or resource that might help others?

• As always recommend you go the library. There is always something neat there.

I went running this week and there was a 5k race on the path that I was running. So at some point I ran alongside people that were in that race. This made me realize that I've reached a point where I could easily finish a 5k race. So I'll be on the lookout and apply for a race as soon as I find one near me!

roll call

@SeventyTwoTrillion@hexbear.net

@Mokey2@hexbear.net

@FumpyAer@hexbear.net

@odmroz@hexbear.net

@Ufot@hexbear.net

@RonPaulyShore@hexbear.net

@Rojo27@hexbear.net

@Grebgreb@hexbear.net

@CommunistBear@hexbear.net

@TraschcanOfIdeology@hexbear.net

@LGOrcStreetSamurai@hexbear.net

@blight@hexbear.net

@quarrk@hexbear.net

@vehicom@lemmygrad.ml

@Aradina@lemmy.ml

@Tomorrow_Farewell@hexbear.net

@LanyrdSkynrd@hexbear.net

@LocalOaf@hexbear.net

@Wmill@hexbear.net

@Cammy@hexbear.net

@bazingabrain@hexbear.net

@Comp4@hexbear.net

@DragonBallZinn@hexbear.net

If anybody else wants to be added to the roll call, just let me know

Technique:

[ ] RLRLL 5 note groupings. 50 Scale 8th notes and triplets.

[ ] KRKR 60-65 Be able to count and lead with foot

Brush Groove:

[v] Groove with Backing Track, seal groove fill up the space, consistency

Groove:

[v] 15 2 bar 2

[v] 15 w cymbal 5

[v] 20 BPM 1 bar 3

[v] 20 w cymbal 5

[v] Backing track 275 x 2 Feather.

[v] 295 x2 Feather.

[v] Backing track 55 x2 Feather.

[v] 120 upbeats 2 feel.

[v] 2 feel 30. On 1

[v] 2 feel 15

Transcription:

[v] Philly Joe Ride Cymbal - Pot Luck 0:14-49

[v] Comping Pot Luck 0:14-49

Active Listening:

[ ] Suggested Albums

Tune Learning:

[ ] Skylark

Ive also started going back to the gym

Been doing a deep clean of the apartment. Also slowly making progress on fixing my fucked sleep schedule.

I finally cleaned my room (bucko).

But in all seriousness, I am tired of feeling completely impotent and helpless about my lot in life. I know I need to start with developing some discipline until I stop being an actual basement dwelling neckbeard, but I have to.

打碎旧世界

传立新世界

• went to bed almost on time, went up way too late (yesterday at like 4pm)
  • sleepy / exhausted / back pain – worth investigating
  • slight caffeine overdose
• walked just above half the average steps i want to
• haven’t showered for 4 days
• bought groceries
• cooked batch meals
• took out some trash
• anxiety about friend not responding to messages
• babysat a cat
• it’s fucking cold i hate it

Gym This week marks the first time I have been to the gym 3 times maybe since high school. Sadly, I do not have access to anything but Planet Fitness right now, but doing a small thing regularly and sustainably is my priority. I am thinking of buying a used power rack when/if I max out on the dumbbells since the smith machines hurt my back.

I am looking for advice to improve my routine. Right now, I do 5 sun salutations and whatever stretching feels good, 3x5 (increasing reps until the next weight is doable) of bench presses, leg presses, skull crushers, incline situps, and lat pulldowns building to pullups. My main goal is to develop a good outlet for physical energy and get more confidence in my physical condition for street fighting so I am ultimately agnostic about weight lifting. It's just not a martial arts gym I can afford in my area.

Smoking I also haven't smoked cigarettes since Rosh Hashannah and I am never going back (hopefully). Already my lungs are getting stronger. I had this really beautiful moment at temple last week where I realized I was the last person singing during the Shema where we say each word as a whole breath. That hasn't happened since I picked smoking back up and it made me cry.

Although, I have been snacking and drinking a bit more than I like to compensate, I am developing more self-awareness about it which is helping me go down the right path.

Current Challenges I'm realizing that I have still not developed a good routine or rhythmn for living in my new home which has made it hard to grocery shop and reliably eat good meals since I don't really have a kitchen yet. This has led me to eat out and spend too much on food on top of the sublimated impulses from quitting smoking.

Next Steps My next steps will be to work out my flows for eating and living in my house better, and be more intentional about drinking. 'Having a beer to relax after work' is a slippery slope for me and I need to act more responsibly in light of it.

Finally, I am a first year school teacher and am starting to get into a better workflow with preparation and things which is giving me more and deeper peace during my freetime.

Weight loss is slowing and I'm stayed stable for most of the week.

Got a good mix of gym and home workouts. May start upping the weight at the gym slowly. I don't really have any extra weights at home though so I'll have to consider whether or not I want to invest in a new set of plates.

Date with my crush ended up falling through. We've still been talking, but I've been feeling down about how I don't really spend much time with her or any of my other friends and family.

Made my first substantial open source contribution ever recently and it feels fantastic! It's something I've wanted to do for years, but it always seemed scary and overwhelming, and I was afraid that I would make any project worse by contributing to it. But I managed to find the perfect little project: only a few major contributors, very low-key, lots of low hanging fruit, and interesting enough to keep me motivated. That last part is especially important, since I really struggle with frustration tolerance. I was amazed at how many points I'd hit a wall, feel like I just couldn't do it, and then push through--reading documentation, poring over the existing codebase, trying anything I could think of--finally coming out the other side having learned a bunch of new stuff and solved a problem.

Already tackling my next contribution. My strategy is to keep tackling slightly more ambitious tasks each time so I can keep learning new things and keep the interest high while not getting to frustrated. Who knows--maybe I'll even become a major contributor! Even if I don't, I'm hoping to take the lessons I learn from this project to help me contribute to other projects and also just remind myself in general that I'm capable of way more than I give myself credit for.

Other than that, I'm still keeping my months-long daily walk outside streak alive, and I'm also just getting started with learning how to musically improvise (like, actually improvise, not just mindlessly go up and down the pentatonic scale). Improvisation is incredibly intimidating, and I have trouble with spontaneity in general, but my teacher is really helping me break things down and I can see myself making teensy bits of progress.

My goals for the rest of the week are to get in daily improvisation practice and also spend some time on my own personal coding project (will update this post as I get in those daily practice sessions--first one will be later on today!)

• Day 1 improv practice: ✅
• Day 2: ✅ (could only muster about 10 minutes, but that's better than 0!)
• Day 3 ✅
• Day 4 ✅ (was practicing this one arpeggio lick and it felt like it's finally clicking today, feels so satisfying. Also tried a new strategy to improve my time management and it really helped, might make a separate post if I stick with it)
• Day 5 ✅ (figured out some new ways to mix things up with practice so I feel a bit more motivated)

I have consumed too much beer and now it is 5 am and my stomach is making me regret it, badly. Might has well take the time spent on the throne to type this. Uuuh I’ve spent two days playing dishonored 2, again, that game has captured my imagination and soul. Should’ve probably spent that time doing more productive things but damn it was fun. At least I’m still eating my veggies. Not working out too much, this is liberalism, and I apologise