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Here’s Why I Decided To Buy ‘InfoWars’ (theonion.com)
submitted 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) by TachyonTele@lemm.ee to c/theonion@midwest.social
34 comments fedilink hide all child comments

Through it all, InfoWars has shown an unswerving commitment to manufacturing anger and radicalizing the most vulnerable members of society—values that resonate deeply with all of us at Global Tetrahedron.

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[-] TachyonTele@lemm.ee 167 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)

For those out of the loop:
Global Tetrahedron is a fake evil corporation the Onion used as a bad guy in some stories.
Global Tetrahedron is also the real company that bought the Onion earlier this year.
Global Tetrahedron the real company also really bought InfoWars in a bankruptcy auction.
Global Tetrahedron the fake evil corporation is who wrote this article.

[-] andrew_bidlaw@sh.itjust.works 67 points 2 years ago

The Onion's lore has layers.

[-] Viking_Hippie@lemmy.world 17 points 2 years ago

Like an ogre

[-] seahorse@midwest.social 31 points 2 years ago

🤯

[-] Illecors@lemmy.cafe 0 points 2 years ago

Replying to test email notifications

[-] seahorse@midwest.social 1 points 2 years ago

Got it

[-] Varyk@sh.itjust.works 7 points 2 years ago

thanks

[-] DragonTypeWyvern@midwest.social 4 points 2 years ago

Unless it's the real evil corporation who wrote the article, as capitalism absorbs and monetizes criticism into itself...

[-] ByteOnBikes@slrpnk.net 99 points 2 years ago

[-] Walican132@lemmy.today 56 points 2 years ago

Tim Onion has me wheezing.

[-] ByteOnBikes@slrpnk.net 15 points 2 years ago

Tim Apple's rival

[-] SkunkWorkz@lemmy.world 2 points 2 years ago

Son of Tim Mirepoix, brother of Tim Carrot and Tim Celery and cousin of Tim Apple

[-] Atrichum@lemmy.world 0 points 2 years ago

Whoever downvoted you deserves a wedgie

[-] Varyk@sh.itjust.works 21 points 2 years ago

so who is this guy?

is Tim Onion the official onion bluesky account?

[-] CaptDust@sh.itjust.works 40 points 2 years ago

CEO of Global Tetrahedron, The Onion's parent company

[-] Varyk@sh.itjust.works 6 points 2 years ago

appreciate it, thanks.

[-] NOT_RICK@lemmy.world 75 points 2 years ago

They are a true unicorn, capable of simultaneously inspiring public support for billionaires and stoking outrage at an inept federal state that can assassinate JFK but can’t even put a man on the Moon.

Lmfao

[-] ZeroCool@slrpnk.net 56 points 2 years ago

Just when the country needed a laugh the most, The Onion went and did the funniest thing they could possibly do. This is a wonderful morning.

[-] KingOfTheCouch@lemmy.ca 36 points 2 years ago

I was very amused seeing something cross-posted in both "Not the Onion" and "The Onion" at the same time and side by side in my feed.

[-] TachyonTele@lemm.ee 10 points 2 years ago

We live in interesting times

[-] towerful@programming.dev 2 points 2 years ago

Well....

Shit

[-] Eyck_of_denesle@lemmy.zip 1 points 2 years ago

We live in a "Society"

[-] paddythegeek@lemmy.ca 31 points 2 years ago

This is beautiful.

“a single candy bar–sized omnivitamin”. 😂

[-] taiyang@lemmy.world 10 points 2 years ago

Real Cave Johnson energy.

[-] taiyang@lemmy.world 22 points 2 years ago

My favorite part is how they plan on spending the extra money. Really need to help those at-risk dictatorships!

[-] Mog_fanatic@lemmy.world 25 points 2 years ago

The excess funds initially allocated for the purchase will be reinvested into our philanthropic efforts that include business school scholarships for promising cult leaders, a charity that donates elections to at-risk third world dictators, and a new pro bono program pairing orphans with stable factory jobs at no cost to the factories.

These are the kinds of hard hitting issues that the people actually care about but were mysteriously absent in the talks leading up to the election. It's just crazy how out of touch politicians are these days.

[-] CaptDust@sh.itjust.works 19 points 2 years ago

Cheers, to the continued consolidation of power and capital!

[-] TachyonTele@lemm.ee 21 points 2 years ago

Infinite Growth Forever!

[-] PanArab@lemm.ee 18 points 2 years ago

Infinite Growth Forever,

🥂

[-] Hirom@beehaw.org 12 points 2 years ago

Is this for real?

[-] rmuk@feddit.uk 7 points 2 years ago

Is this, like, fantasy?

[-] TachyonTele@lemm.ee 6 points 2 years ago

Caught in some landside?

[-] rmuk@feddit.uk 5 points 2 years ago

Sucking dick behind Burger King.

this post was submitted on 14 Nov 2024
438 points (99.5% liked)

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