749

submitted 10 months ago by fossilesque@mander.xyz to c/science_memes@mander.xyz

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[-] RememberTheApollo_@lemmy.world 117 points 10 months ago

Imagine all the designer gastroliths. Gucci rocks in your stomach. All the snake oil ones that “cleanse”, “detox”, or have positive ionic charges or something. Someone surely would suggest plastic, or those would be the cheap ones at gas stations. At some point, we would have had people shilling asbestos or uranium gastroliths as good for you. Someone else would pick rocks up along stream beds and sell them as “organic”, nevermind the parasites or other possible diseases attached to them. Someone would push bullshit medical rocks instead of vaccines as cures for diseases.

Lol, people would make a mess of plain old rocks.

[-] ilinamorato@lemmy.world 26 points 10 months ago

College bros would compete to swallow the roughest and sharpest ones. There would be a Silicon Valley startup trying to "disrupt" gastroliths with a "smart stomach stone" that gathered data about what you're eating and sold it to McDonald's and Kroger. Couples who were really serious would prove it by regurgitating and swapping stones. The "raw gut" movement would be trying to convince people that they didn't need gastroliths, they just needed to eat softer foods.

[-] SaharaMaleikuhm@feddit.org 20 points 10 months ago

Damn, this was eye-opening. I seem to hate humans quite a bit.

[-] Nindelofocho@lemmy.world 1 points 10 months ago

It would absolutely be a fetish too

[-] Shawdow194@fedia.io 1 points 10 months ago

Well think of the actual "real" rocks though. Some humans would've put time, effort, and thought into testing a safe, effective, and healthy mass scale solution

That's what makes humans cool!

[-] Zementid@feddit.nl 11 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

Smart Gastroliths would definitely be a thing. Ai enhanced gyroscopic gastrolith for assisted fiber digestion.

[-] ThisIsAManWhoKnowsHowToGling@lemmy.dbzer0.com 10 points 10 months ago

Guarantee that it's only a matter of time that some snake oil company would release a gastolith that actually gives off positive ions because it contains thorium.

[-] Swedneck@discuss.tchncs.de 5 points 10 months ago

remember to sterilize your gastroliths, but be careful so you don't create microfractures that might splinter off in your stomach and kill you! Just stick to smooth polished rocks washed in soap.

[-] Nindelofocho@lemmy.world 3 points 10 months ago

There would definitely be vibrating rocks

[-] Technus@lemmy.zip 62 points 10 months ago

Limestone, calcite and chalk are the same compound as the active ingredient in antacid tablets: calcium carbonate. There isn't much danger in eating small amounts of it.

[-] brbposting@sh.itjust.works 54 points 10 months ago

In fact, it’s best practice

[-] TriflingToad@sh.itjust.works 16 points 10 months ago

how small is small?

[-] Technus@lemmy.zip 21 points 10 months ago

You know how big an antacid tablet is? About that amount.

[-] ryannathans@aussie.zone 16 points 10 months ago

Chalk it up to a feeling but eating a little bit of sand and whatnot is probably good for us

[-] ShinkanTrain@lemmy.ml 6 points 10 months ago

I'm drawing with marker and like pen and stuff, I'm just eating the chalk

[-] Zoop@beehaw.org 1 points 10 months ago

Charlie, if your stomach hurts, eat a Tums!

[-] IMongoose@lemmy.world 1 points 10 months ago

Whenever someone asks for tums I tell them "just eat chalk, it's the same thing."

[-] Benjaben@lemmy.world 3 points 10 months ago

So we do swallow rocks!

[-] brown567@sh.itjust.works 2 points 10 months ago

I eat Halite pretty frequently

[-] ilinamorato@lemmy.world 1 points 10 months ago

People will make a health conspiracy out of every innocuous thing, though.

[-] kemsat@lemmy.world 25 points 10 months ago

Wouldn’t quartz cut up your insides?

[-] three@lemm.ee 37 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

Cut my insides to pieces, this is my gastrolith

[-] douz0a0bouz@midwest.social 20 points 10 months ago

Don't give a fuck if I cut my guts bleeding

[-] errer@lemmy.world 30 points 10 months ago

[-] MonkderVierte@lemmy.ml 20 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

Btw, our digestive tract can't handle rocks; swallowing rocks is hazardous.

Edit: typo

[-] Lemminary@lemmy.world 15 points 10 months ago

Thank you! I was about to put one in my mouth when I saw your comment. Close call.

[-] qyron@sopuli.xyz 20 points 10 months ago

Nerdy joke, if I've ever seen one.

[-] pigup@lemmy.world 15 points 10 months ago

My ruined mind immediately wonders how porn would be different. Similarly, imagine if we had tails. Would we put underwear on them? Would we shave our tails?

[-] gazter@aussie.zone 16 points 10 months ago

Oh my fuck, we absolutely would shave our tails, and there is just something so horrid about that thought that how I won't be able to fucking sleep, thanks, I hate it.

[-] etchinghillside@reddthat.com 7 points 10 months ago

Just think of all the holes those shaved tails can fit into.

[-] humorlessrepost@lemmy.world 2 points 10 months ago

Are they prehensile?

[-] mnemonicmonkeys@sh.itjust.works 2 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

It might not be as bad as you're thinking. Demon tails usually aren't depicted as having hair. Also, without the hair the skin would have melanin in it due to sun exposure. Or people would have it spray-tanned

[-] Donkter@lemmy.world 13 points 10 months ago

The Victorian era would have made it so that showing any amount of tail was scandalous and we would all be wearing these bizarre contraptions designed to hide our tails beneath our clothing. Most people would be aware of the fact that keeping our tails tied up was an antiquated puritanical practice that was overall unhealthy for us, but even still, the brave few who chose to let their tale go in public would be looked at as pariahs even by those who ostensibly agreed with the reason behind it.