Marmite Crumpets don't exist

Yet you brought them into existence. May god have mercy on your soul.

To quote a fictional character, Casey Jones from the original Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie;

cricket?! Youve gotta know what a crumpet is to understand cricket!

Maple Walnut ice cream seems to be impossible to find in stores outside of New England

Speculoos and jelly sandwiches. It's possible they serve that in Europe somewhere, but you could never find that served in the US.

I'd like to be proven wrong though.

The Cannibal Sandwich, which doesn't actually use human flesh, but is also not a sandwich. Anyway, you take a slice of rye cocktail bread, spread on some raw, ground beef, then top it with some sliced onion, salt, and pepper. You can't get it ready-made, because nobody likes e. coli or salmonella poisoning. In fact, you have to make special arrangements to get the beef ground by a butcher in a clean grinder, and pretty much eat it the same day.

Properly cooked hash browns. It takes too long for a restaurant to do it.

Marmite on Weetbix.

Ingredients:

• 1 Weetbix
• butter (lots)
• Marmite (lots)

Method:
Select a choice looking compressed wheat brick, apply a thick layer of butter, spread the Marmite across the layer of butter.

This was a common school snack when I was growing up.

Some cafes will do it - not as standard, but a few - maybe try the ones trying to be 1-up from a greasy. https://seahousescafe.co.uk/the-breakfast-menu

As will many hotel breakfasts, there's often little single serving marmite things in with the single serving jam packets. I'd say about half the hotels i've stayed in with decent cooked breakfast have had it on offer.

I've also seen it in little roadside food van / trailer type things too.

Anyway, you want sainsbury's yeast extract instead of marmite, it's way gloopier and nicer tasting.

Trypophobia, apparently

A Twinkie weiner sandwich.

1. Cook a hot dog
2. Slice a twinkie halfway through the bottom longwise to get something like a hotdog bun
3. Insert the cooked hotdog into newly created bun
4. Squirt easy cheese along the length of the hot dog
5. Dip in milk
6. Eat

Weird Al invented this in 1989 in his movie UHF and it’s still not available in stores for some reason