132
submitted 3 weeks ago by Emperor@feddit.uk to c/andfinally@feddit.uk

Police say that the man had been intoxicated and began arguing with patrons inside the establishment, and that the dispute then spilled into the street. At some point in the melee, the aggressor's pants fell down and his penis apparently became stuck to the ice. Somehow, though details were not specified, emergency personnel managed to detach him, relatively uninjured. He was subsequently arrested but not charged with a crime.

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[-] Zachariah@lemmy.world 27 points 3 weeks ago

“I triple-dog-dare ya!”

[-] Grabthar@lemmy.world 7 points 3 weeks ago

Triple dong dare?

[-] podperson@lemm.ee 6 points 3 weeks ago

Stuck... stuck... STUUUUUCK!

[-] ArtVandelay@lemmy.world 2 points 3 weeks ago

Lmao thanks you

[-] ReverseDiarrhea@lemm.ee 20 points 3 weeks ago

Apparently the heavily blurred photos showed the man's member "basically glued" to the ice even as people tried to help pull him off.

The last thing I’d want if my dick was frozen to the sidewalk would be strangers trying to pull me off. I usually like to get to know someone before I let them pull me off.

[-] MrPoletki@feddit.uk 4 points 3 weeks ago

the heat from all that extra blood flow might melt the ice, surely?

[-] Emperor@feddit.uk 1 points 3 weeks ago

Don't call me Shirley!

[-] dogsnest@lemmy.world 15 points 3 weeks ago

Crocodile Dundee: "You call THAT a penis?"

[-] Zip2@feddit.uk 9 points 3 weeks ago
[-] Geobloke@lemm.ee 3 points 3 weeks ago

I've seen that

[-] Hossenfeffer@feddit.uk 15 points 3 weeks ago

This is the kind of content I pay my license fee for.

[-] NakariLexfortaine@lemm.ee 13 points 3 weeks ago

This is the risk you take when you go for the emergency tactic.

Make sure you have good traction before doin' the ol' "Won't fight a man with his penis out".

[-] JohnSmith@feddit.uk 9 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

Sounds like a regular winter weekend out in Newcastle.

[-] Jimbabwe@lemmy.world 9 points 3 weeks ago

Thank you for posting and helping to spread awareness. Next time it could be me. Next time it could be you! Stay vigilant, folks!

Jimbabwe Founder of Concretepheliacs, USA “Thrusting Toward a Level, Uncompressed Playing Field”

[-] shalafi@lemmy.world 9 points 3 weeks ago

“Eddie was doing well. The gunslinger measured just how well by the fact that he was fighting naked. That was hard for a man. Sometimes impossible.”

[-] corsicanguppy@lemmy.ca 8 points 3 weeks ago

Fort mcMurray

Came to see where in rural Alberta it was, guessed it in 2.

(Guessed WhiteCourt first)

[-] Emperor@feddit.uk 5 points 3 weeks ago

Yes, I've seen a few comments where people were unsurprised it happened there. Must be a fun place!

[-] over_clox@lemmy.world 7 points 3 weeks ago

It was cold enough last week for that to be a Florida Man story 😂

[-] SweetCitrusBuzz@beehaw.org 6 points 3 weeks ago

[Genuine] Glad they specified a man's penis. The cis (or at least this journal) are learning.

[-] elfpie@beehaw.org 7 points 3 weeks ago

I feel bad challenging this assumption, but I believe it is just a case of needing someone connected to the penis in a passive voice headline and they went the generic approach. Nothing special about the man, so just man. Not a male / man penis. It's possessive.

[-] Zip2@feddit.uk 5 points 3 weeks ago

Could have been literal brass monkeys weather.

[-] swab148@lemm.ee 1 points 3 weeks ago

YOU GOT THE MONKEY, I GOT THE CUP

C'MON EVERYBODY LET'S GET

[-] Stalinwolf@lemmy.ca 3 points 3 weeks ago

I really need to stop opening my gate with my penis.

[-] kimagurevenus@beehaw.org 3 points 3 weeks ago
[-] MrPoletki@feddit.uk 3 points 3 weeks ago

Wow,

'only in Canada' huh?

[-] Dasus@lemmy.world 4 points 3 weeks ago

Oh I can completely see this happening in Finland as well.

Have a guy drunk with a bad belt and loose pants, he tries to shove someone but overreaches, falls down on his face while his pants fall down.

Hits his face while going down, passes out and people start looking/laughing. It's like -20c outside so as soon as you touch ice or metal with a warm body part, you get stuck. And because he was unconscious he didn't instantly move when he felt the ice hitting his dick, because he didn't.

Then paramedics come and use warm water/salt to get him off without tearing his dick too badly.

Basic Friday.

[-] Whelks_chance@lemmy.world 1 points 3 weeks ago
[-] lnxtx@feddit.nl 1 points 3 weeks ago

Is the Men's Journal an onion?

[-] Emperor@feddit.uk 4 points 3 weeks ago
[-] MrPoletki@feddit.uk 2 points 3 weeks ago
[-] Emperor@feddit.uk 2 points 3 weeks ago

Put it away then!

this post was submitted on 27 Jan 2025
132 points (99.3% liked)

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