641

Thank god "shit" is censored (lemmy.ml)

submitted 2 weeks ago by LifeLemons@lemmy.ml to c/greentext@sh.itjust.works

151 comments fedilink hide all child comments

top 50 comments

sorted by: hot top controversial new old

[-] qyron@sopuli.xyz 135 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

be 20 y/o permavirgin

I was 22 when I had my first time. Never considered myself a permavirgin.

Happy the poster found happiness for the following reasons:

a) he got laid

b) he's no longer a virgin

c) he found happiness

d) he found someone to love and that loves him back

e) there are two more people happy in the world

but, holy turtle on a skateboard, am I really happy for having one less doofus complaining of being alone.

Bring on the hate! I love you all!

[-] SitD@lemy.lol 29 points 2 weeks ago

😍 we love you too dude

load more comments (3 replies)

[-] uniquethrowagay@feddit.org 17 points 2 weeks ago

I was 29 years old when I met my first girlfriend and had my first sex and I regret nothing. I didn't really realize it at the time, but I wasn't at all ready at 20 years old.

load more comments (5 replies)

load more comments (4 replies)

[-] Boomkop3@reddthat.com 122 points 2 weeks ago

I wonder how long the "pretends" remains a thing

[-] webghost0101@sopuli.xyz 109 points 2 weeks ago

[-] jia_tan@lemmy.blahaj.zone 50 points 2 weeks ago

[-] EldritchFeminity@lemmy.blahaj.zone 25 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

Edit: Wrong one

The cis male urge to:

[-] EldritchFeminity@lemmy.blahaj.zone 22 points 2 weeks ago

The cis male urge to:

Posted the wrong one before

[-] miss_demeanour@lemmy.dbzer0.com 18 points 2 weeks ago

Depends on the pretense, presumably.

load more comments (1 replies)

[-] peregrin5@lemm.ee 104 points 2 weeks ago

The solution to incels was femboy waifus all along.

[-] AI_toothbrush@lemmy.zip 95 points 2 weeks ago

Thank god they censored apeshit

[-] ICastFist@programming.dev 46 points 2 weeks ago

Language, motherfucker! 😡

[-] rbn@sopuli.xyz 23 points 2 weeks ago

🚨 This way, officer... That's the one who used the swearwords. 😱

[-] ShinkanTrain@lemmy.ml 89 points 2 weeks ago

Fake: Anyone you meet on Discord is either a murderer or a fed.

Gay: Self-evident.

[-] shadowedcross@sh.itjust.works 31 points 2 weeks ago

Can confirm, met several people from discord, am now dead.

load more comments (5 replies)

[-] prime_number_314159@lemmy.world 27 points 2 weeks ago

I mean... Nothing in this story implies femboy isn't a fed, and just really committed to the bit.

load more comments (3 replies)

load more comments (1 replies)

[-] ConstantPain@lemmy.world 61 points 2 weeks ago

Where these housewife Discord femboys in the room with us right now?

[-] mnemonicmonkeys@sh.itjust.works 15 points 2 weeks ago

Asking for a friend

load more comments (4 replies)

[-] intensely_human@lemm.ee 59 points 2 weeks ago

enterprise resource planning??

[-] UltraGiGaGigantic@lemmy.ml 1 points 1 day ago

Erotic Role Play

[-] ThePyroPython@lemmy.world 23 points 2 weeks ago

Now you know how machinists feel about CNC.

load more comments (1 replies)

load more comments (5 replies)

[-] LuckyPierre@lemm.ee 58 points 2 weeks ago

Aww, that's sweet. A real modern day love story.

[-] Agent641@lemmy.world 32 points 2 weeks ago

A modern Romeo and Romeo

[-] JayDee@lemmy.sdf.org 14 points 2 weeks ago

Romeow

load more comments (1 replies)

[-] trashgirlfriend@lemmy.world 54 points 2 weeks ago

Twinkdeath gonna hit them like a truck

[-] Comment105@lemm.ee 30 points 2 weeks ago

To expand on that, there are no successful fem-men for good reason. So around the age of 30 "twink death" will set in, and anon will go longer like his former femboy, at least not for that part of him.

Unlike most gay men, he's probably not actually comfortable being with a man. They're not prepared to grow old together because he relies on his boyfriend's ability to maintain his suspension of disbelief. That will almost certainly no longer be possible after twink death no matter how hard he tries.

load more comments (10 replies)

[-] jia_tan@lemmy.blahaj.zone 21 points 2 weeks ago

WHY IS EVERYONE POSTING EGG EMOJIS???!!!??!!

load more comments (1 replies)

[-] stebo02@lemmy.dbzer0.com 52 points 2 weeks ago

20 years of virginity are rookie numbers, I'm getting those wizard powers at 30

[-] Wizard_Pope@lemmy.world 19 points 2 weeks ago

Be careful to keept it then. My people are watching. If you lose your Virginity there go the powers.

load more comments (5 replies)

load more comments (1 replies)

[-] WorldsDumbestMan@lemmy.today 45 points 2 weeks ago

It's actually easy to get laid, turns out you just have to not be afraid of people (which I am)

load more comments (3 replies)

[-] djsoren19@lemmy.blahaj.zone 43 points 2 weeks ago

I've spent like 5 minutes searching and still cannot get a definitive answer. wth is the qualifier that makes a sundress "anime?"

[-] sp3tr4l@lemmy.zip 58 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

The zoomer incel gooner that spends weeks or months ERPing in discord consumes only anime as media and does not ever see an actual woman in an actual sundress, in media or the real world.

Thus, to them, all sundresses are anime sundresses.

[-] djsoren19@lemmy.blahaj.zone 21 points 2 weeks ago

...y'know this explanation makes a lot of sense.

[-] sp3tr4l@lemmy.zip 17 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

I said it because I've known quite a few zoomer hikikomori.

Its like people who only read or type words, but never actually have audible conversations with those words... they have no idea how to pronounce them.

Why would they? No relevant use case.

load more comments (7 replies)

[-] bane_killgrind@slrpnk.net 20 points 2 weeks ago

My work is getting a new ERP and I just got out of a long meeting about it. I'm a little disoriented.

load more comments (5 replies)

[-] PineRune@lemmy.world 49 points 2 weeks ago

You won't find an answer.

load more comments (1 replies)

[-] osaerisxero@kbin.melroy.org 27 points 2 weeks ago

When it's this one: https://static.myfigurecollection.net/upload/pictures/2019/04/11/2192078.jpeg

load more comments (4 replies)

[-] Fedegenerate@lemmynsfw.com 40 points 2 weeks ago

Me when I'm attracted to feminine, no matter the source.

[-] TriflingToad@sh.itjust.works 16 points 2 weeks ago

username checks out
instance checks out

load more comments (1 replies)

[-] Gullible@sh.itjust.works 40 points 2 weeks ago

Anon, you gotta lock that up. Get him preganat immediately

[-] Agent641@lemmy.world 22 points 2 weeks ago

That might be difficult. But keep trying anyway.

[-] napkin2020@sh.itjust.works 38 points 2 weeks ago

That's a bit gay

[-] Opisek@lemmy.world 18 points 2 weeks ago

But is it fake and the OP is gay?

load more comments (5 replies)

[-] GNUmer@sopuli.xyz 35 points 2 weeks ago

Real: Dude thought he was going to be a permavirgin at age 20

Gay: He's pinning a Discord femboy

[-] Thcdenton@lemmy.world 16 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

rocksolid.png

load more comments (2 replies)

load more comments

this post was submitted on 07 Feb 2025

641 points (95.2% liked)

Greentext

5158 readers

826 users here now

This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

Be warned:

Anon is often crazy.
Anon is often depressed.
Anon frequently shares thoughts that are immature, offensive, or incomprehensible.

If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

founded 1 year ago

MODERATORS

Early_To_Risa@sh.itjust.works