I was sitting in during the vows ceremony of my own wedding (everyone told me I should get married, and the groom told he would pay for everything).
When it came to the "do you take thee, to be your loyal wedded..." part, I said "yes", as per the original plan.
When it came to his part, the best man came in out of nowhere and asked me to say thank you for this wonderful wedding. I stared at him, but then the groom himself starts going on about how I'm ungrateful for all that he's done for me, and that without his support there would be no wedding at all.
I'm dumbfounded, the groom was the one pushing for the wedding beforehand, promising unwavouring support for it and now it's my fault?
At this point the groom and his best man, hold hands and declare that the wedding is off, and that they're off to some russian night club to dance off my toxicity.
Motherfucker, I didn't ask for any of this. If I recall, you were marrying me to piss off that night club owner in the first place, and now you're suddenly best buddies with him and putting the whole wedding on me? Asshole.
“They are literally treating him like he is some sort of political fodder, like some sort of spectacle,” Agnifilo said. “He was on display for everyone to see in the biggest stage perp walk I’ve ever seen in my career, it was absolutely unnecessary. He’s been cooperative with law enforcement... There was no reason for the NYPD and everybody to have these big assault rifles.”
“It was perfectly choreographed, and what was the New York City Mayor doing at this press conference, your honor? That just made it utterly political,” she continued.
His lawyer seems to not be afraid to pull any punches, I like her.
Three of the main characters were the same actor, and yet there are shots with all of them in the same scene. When I saw this as a young adult I didn't even notice that Mike Myers was playing three roles and was genuinely dumbfounded years later when I found out.
How did they do those scenes so seamlessly?
One of the oldest Chinese restaurants in the UK crams all foreigners upstairs to share tables with random strangers, where cutlery is thrown at you carelessly and the waiter tuts if you don't give them a string of numbers as an order. If you go there with a chinese national you're somewhat protected from the abuse, but they still glare at you.
Anyway the food is divine and they don't overcharge, and it's one of my favourite places to eat.
This happened in my art class once. Our kooky art teacher invited an ex-student in without any prior warning and we were supposed to ask him questions on his art (he did book covers).
Silence, no one was having this shit. Out of pity I asked him questions on some tiny details I noticed on the spot. More silence, I ask about different tiny details. And so forth.
I've realised that there's a large portion of the populace that are perfectly comfortable in excruciating silence if it's not at their expense.
... and now for the resolution! I took all the suggestions from Last Week's Comic to heart and tried to come up with something that satisfied most of them:
| Author | Say | Malicious | Funny | Crash | Butt | Music | British | Romance | Beer |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| @T00l_shed@lemmy.world | X | X | |||||||
| @limelight79@lemm.ee | X | X | |||||||
| @RagingHungryPanda@lemm.ee | X | ||||||||
| @TOModera@lemmy.world | X | Hay | |||||||
| @wabafee@lemmy.world | X | X | |||||||
| @GuyDudeman@lemmy.world | X | X | X | ||||||
| @fpslem@lemmy.world | X | X | |||||||
| @superkret@feddit.org | X | X | |||||||
| @pulverizedcoccyx@lemmy.ca | X | X | |||||||
| @odd@feddit.org | Hospital | Hospital | |||||||
| @Deestan@lemmy.world | Lawyer | ||||||||
| @hsdkfr734r@feddit.nl | X | ||||||||
| @Venat0r@lemmy.world | X | ||||||||
| @richardisaguy@lemmy.world | X | ||||||||
| @Maultasche@lemmy.world | X | ||||||||
| @ouRKaoS@lemmy.today | Sexy | ||||||||
| @Samsy@lemmy.ml | X | ||||||||
| @RagingHungryPanda@lemm.ee | X | ||||||||
| @Boozilla@lemmy.world | Grey Poupon | ||||||||
| @TheFriar@lemm.ee | Friendly | ||||||||
| @absGeekNZ@lemmy.nz | Race | ||||||||
| @andrew_bidlaw@sh.itjust.works | X | ||||||||
| @bigboismith@lemmy.world | Penis | ||||||||
| @x00za@lemmy.dbzer0.com | Existential | ||||||||
| @Ignotum@lemmy.world | Existential |
New premise out in a few days!
You decide what happens next. Outcome dependent on two factors: how much I like the answer, and how many votes it got.
Updates weekly.
Ours plays the 1979 hit Music Box Dancer which is weird because it's definitely not public domain.
Oh it's not just inflation, add global warming too as "excuses to hide behind"
I was watching BBC news yesterday. Thames Water (the corporation that owns the water in London (yes the UK is fucked when it comes to public utilities...)) has issues keeping the actual water clean to use.
What was their excuse? They can't blame the Tory government that let corporations dump toxic waste into the rivers, because that same government basically owns the BBC and also let Thames Water fly under the radar for a few years when their own QC was pushed on the backburner.
So what do they say? Global warming. Global warming is the reason that the water in the UK is so bad.
Okay.
I met my first girlfriend that way, we'd go hunting for crabs in the wilderness by day and then sell our catch at the marketplace. It was hard being online at the same time but we made it work. We built fires and prayed in the evenings under the starry sky, and fell asleep in each others arms, until that fateful night when I came back from my fishing trip to find all her belongings in a single pile, surrounded by blood. I feared the worst, but kept hopeful and waited. My patience waning, I finally ventured out of the wilderness and towards the reset point, where I found her... outside of a cave garbed in dungeoneer equipment mumbling nonsensical words about grinding. :'-(
The comment about it being dominated by rich streamers, who could afford the entry + could train full-time, definitely made me draw parallels between them and duelling knights of yore, who were usually part of the nobility.
It would be nice to see some more random contenders from more mixed backgrounds
This is a weird sub