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Probably super dumb but my temper got the better of me
(hexbear.net)
Sent this to a lib friend of mine. Hasnt responded yet. He previously harshly scolded me for saying I wouldn't mourn Carter's death. He also complained abour leftists speaking horribly about world leaders. I probably shouldnt burn bridges but Im just so fucking mad at libs continuing to prioritize civility politics over actually doing or saying anything meaningful. Not to self-aggrandize obviously Im not doing activism feuding with my friends lmao. Anyway I guess Im still angry and I couldn't help needling him. I probably need to grow up and let shit go lol.
i don't agree that what op has done is mad toxic. op is not "crazy aggressive or vindictive". op wasnt "drunk", "at a wedding or birthday party."
op expressed privately to his "friend" thru text his happiness at a political leaders sickness. A friend who "harshly scolded him" for not mourning Carter's death. sounds like their relationship just be that way, or they're in the middle of a long argument about "civility" towards dying liberal leaders. I cannot say. What I can say is that it doesn't much match the examples you wrote.
While it's admirable you wish to "diffuse social stress" for people, the situations you've brought up and what op is speaking about are not at all the same. It feels like you might be projecting your previous upsetting interactions on to OPs post.
moving on. i have expressed happiness at world leader's deaths when it has been brought up by my friends n fam. I do it because i get absolutely sick at the fawning obsequiousness the media gives dying "elites" especially when they directly contribute to world suffering.
My close peeps who bring these things up do so —i can only assume— because they want to hear me rant (my friends love my rants believe it or not).
As i am the left-mosterest of my fam/friends they get to hear a perspective they don't hear in this rightwinged age. Then they ask questions like "Carter? wtf i thought he was great lol why do you hate his ass?" and we talk about why. Usually they don't tell me to shut up. if they don't want to talk no more, i stop. we never fight, even if we disagree. the fact we can talk like this without anger is why we're friends after all these years.
Disagreement isn't toxic. Saying provocative statements isnt 'aggressive'. you n i aren't having a toxic discussion right now (not that you said so, doing a tone-check), we simply disagree.
There is nothing wrong with disagreement, and nothing to diffuse, stress to alleviate. I just think you're (not on purpose, just by way of your experience) mischaracterizing ops post.
If you wanna talk on tips bout how to talk back to rude people at parties im no expert (I'm the ranter not the fig leaf) but ill try.