My favorite is this combo of AI "benefits":

1. Create fully-written emails from a few simple bullet points!
2. Summarize long emails into simple bullet points!

AI is getting billions in investment. Every single company out there is pushing employees to use it. Most brands have OKRs of shoving AI into their services.

And yet a chat box, removing objects in pictures or generating mediocre images is all they ever achieve.

Nobody goes beyond that. It's always the same as ChatGPT but with a modified system prompt. It's always image generation. Oh look we spent half of the quarter's budget but now our website displays an AI generated summary on top of the already easy to read information!

Which to me is irrefutable proof that AI is a useless money sink. Every company out there battling to grab your attention with AI, billions of dollars, market pressure and it's still useless?

I recently saw an AI summary appear on a YouTube video. "This is a video about a man sitting in a room talking about technical stuff." Yeah, no shit, I knew that by seeing the thumbnail. A small list of the point he was making was too much for an AI. Useless toys.

Hey AI, I bought ad time without any real idea what to pitch, what do I do

AI: Sandwich

Wow

@grok is this real?

These versions of the ads are so cringe to me.

“Help me lie to people’s faces” is a terrible ad campaign.

The Apple one with that last of us actress is especially cringe as she greets him and just lies to his face about how could she not remember. I need help remembering names, but that’s not what the ad was showing.

“Is that rain?”

Narrator: It was March 5th.

Lmao yes.

But now you can talk to your phone! Yeah it could already do that. But now it can misunderstand you and fuck up what you wanted it to do! Jup already did that as well. But now it can misunderstand you in new and mysterious ways! You son of a bitch, I'm in

The first public demo of Siri back when the iPhone 4S launched is more impressive than most AI commercials.

Wait... gochujang is Korean spicy red pepper paste. Gemini suggested turning it into cookies?

Sounds to me like it created more problems than it solved.

Woah there, you're talking like a guy who has never had pasta a la cookies

I am so used with uBlock origin and DNS level blocking that when i use someone else device i just get confused by the absurd amount of ads

We had a presentation at work that the VPs were so proud of and proclaimed to be the future of business with AI. Ready? Are you sure? The pure vision involved is staggering, and I want you to be prepared for it. Ok, here goes:

Here's the scenario... A buyer gets an email from another employee to buy something for the business. The buyer opens an AI bot and tells it to search their email for purchase requests. The AI identifies which emails are likely purchase requests. The buyer then asks the AI to see the first one. It is a purchase request! Hooray! The AI sees that the amount is over a certain dollar amount. It asks, "Do you want to forward it to your manager for approval?" "Why, yes, thank you!" It then sends a kindly worded email on their behalf to their manager. Eventually, the manager replies and the next time the buyer opens their AI chatbot it notices the response and interprets the response as an approval. "Would you like to process this purchase request?" "Yes please, almighty chat bot!" The application then copies what it thinks are the relevant data (carefully formatted for the success of the demo, of course) into a web form open in a browser window for the buyer to submit to the purchasing system.

Mid-six figure executives of this fortune 100 company, some with C__ in their titles, applauded. They shook hands. They beamed and professed the future was here and we were on the forefront of it.

Not a single Vice President in this "technology company" bothered asking WHY THE FUCK WE WERE MAKING PURCHASE REQUESTS BY FUCKING EMAIL. Like, maybe we should go back to 1999 and master digital workflows first? Or at this point even pay some consultant hacks to implement some of that RPA crack they were peddling a decade before that we dropped $10M on? Or maybe, maybe, take Microsoft's dick out of our mouths long enough to ask whether ANY of this makes sense!

The future has arrived. This bubble can't pop soon enough.

I guarantee you the classic Google Assistant could've done the same. I switched back to it on my phone because, at least when they switched it to Gemini, it couldn't send texts. I often old down the assistant button on my phone (basically the same as "hey Google" voice prompt but I don't have that enabled) and say "Text (wife name)" and it'll say, "sure, what's the message." And you dictate to it. But Gemini? It was like "I can't do that 🥺" like... Then why the fuck are you here? But I guess it can do stuff like that now. I just can't imagine why they'd swap the hands free assistant to something that can't do the things you normally want to do hands free. Because immediately after I was like "call (wife's name)" and again it was like "I can't 🥺🥺🥺"

We technically solved this problem years ago:

I often need someone to tell me what to eat.

Computer is thinking

Computer is calculating an answer

Computer is incorporating your personal preferences

Computer is polling the audience

Computer is building a heuristic with over 9000 data points in order to triangulate the perfect meal for you in this given moment

Computer is producing a response

🥪

You can make a list of 20 options and roll a d20 dice.