I met a hexbear once. They were making babies and I saw one of the babies and the baby looked at me and the baby called me a liberal.

I actually have a pocket full of rats looking for side kicks and I help them find plucky humans to take under their wing.

This was me. You met me.

Hi, do you have a moment to talk about our lord and saviour?

spoiler

My passive income, no!

DO NOT DO THIS

It was me, I sold your apes!

the hexbears turned me into a newt

One of them randomly handed me a folded up sheet of paper with :PIGPOOPBALLS: on it on the bus

I'm using this as a copy pasta now. This had me fucking rolling.

Weird, I only hand out , must be a regional thing

Also despite what my shirt says I only pray to Xi in moments of extreme anguish

I thought I met one once, turned out it was just a grizzly that had been cursed.

I heard they all smell like owl piss.

Xi is my God, so what?

At least they did not come at you with a comically large spoon

Me too; they called me a lib and wanted to deport me to America. Vile shit I tell you... wouldn't wish America to my worst enemy.

Couldn't be a Hexbear user, they didn't call you a lib

I met a hexbear one time and I was loudly told to get back inside because I was mistaken for a cat (I'm small and covered in fur)