Skunks really are deceptively adorable. There's a family of them that hang around the area between my home and the gas station I sometimes walk to at night, and I've caught them out there crossing the street and thought "Aww, how cu- ohfuuuuck walking back home, walking back home, runningbackhome"

I used to work with somebody who says she kept a de-glanded (not sure what the term is) skunk as a kid, and apparently they make good pets and allegedly have "fat ferret energy". But apparently they still stink even without their gland.

Yes ?

as you feel your body just stop doing things that keep you alive (like breathing)...

As I understand it (and to be fair, I'm no octopus scientist or human medical doctor) it's pretty much just breathing that's the issue. It doesn't really directly cause any damage on its own (though the consequences of not breathing can and will of course cause quite a lot of damage in pretty short order)

The venom causes paralysis, basically by (someone correct me if I'm wrong) clogging up the receptors your body uses to send signals to your muscles. It will all get cleared up in about 24 hours or so though.

Problem is that you use some of those muscles to breathe. But if you make it to shore (you also need some of those muscles to swim) and if you get put on a ventilator right away (to do the breathing for you,) your prognosis is actually pretty good and there's a nearly 100% survival rate (although that has to be two of the biggest "ifs" in all of medicine)

Another thing that comes to mind is your heart also uses muscles to do its thing, and I'm not totally clear on why that doesn't seem to be a factor here, since paralyzing those muscles is basically just instant cardiac arrest. I did a bit of googling, but I'll be honest I was in deep over my head in medical jargon and couldn't make heads nor tails of it. I think my takeaway is that tetrodotoxincan affect the heart muscles, but I guess for whatever reason (dosage? Different kinds of muscles? The way your body processes the venom and moves it around your body? I really don't know) it just kind of doesn't, which I guess is lucky for us. I'm kind of hoping someone who speak doctor will maybe see this and give an ELI5 answer to that.

I suspect there's probably a lot of minor consequences, like I bet your next trip to the bathroom once you recover in going to be some sort of event after your bowels stopped moving for 24 hours, but otherwise it seems like if you hang out on a ventilator for a day unable to move (which, to be fair, is probably one of the last ways I'd want to spend a day, but I guess it narrowly beats out a refrigerated cubby in the morgue) you're pretty much in the clear to get on with your life.

human brain: bear will kill you monkey brain: hehe fluffie

Here we go again.... /s

It helps that they smell godawful. They’re funny and cute and adorable but the whole otter smells like a butthole, which stops me from petting them. Barely.

I saw a tiger pacing back and forth and thought "yup, predator" and then it rolled on its back and exposed its fluffy belly and I was immediately disarmed.

You don't see them. You are on the ice and so are they. They hunker down and purposefully cover their nose with their paw when you look in their direction. When you look away, they creep closer until your head starts to turn again. They don't want you don't see the little black spot getting closer and closer. If you are lucky and looking around while you are out on the ice, you will see a little black spot disappear. If you do. GET OUT NOW. If the spot was big enough to notice, the bear is probably close enough to charge. I hope your snow machines are close and ready to go.

They are wild animals, but are almost eerily human.

They are incredibly smart and highly emotionally intelligent. Their families are very much like our own human families, and knowledge is passed down through generations. Some families pass down specialized knowledge that puts them on par with hunter-gatherers. I'd put wolves on the short list of intelligent species who could eventually evolve into a species that could be capable of much more, given a long enough timeline where they self-select for intelligence. Same with elephants, ravens, dolphins, chimps, and whales.

Though that would have to exist on a planet where we didn't kill most of them and wreck the environment.

WATCH A VIDEO OF SNAKES DRINKING WATER RIGHT THE FUCK NOW

Venomous, platypus produce venom.

Nothing more dangerous than a female haggis guarding her neeps.

Human adults

Plus bonus chlamydia!

Look at the bones!

Where do I find you?