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hahahahaha get fucked Eli Roth

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[-] LaGG_3@hexbear.net 53 points 3 months ago

Jack Black threw Kyle Gass under the bus for this and biden-alert

[-] SorosFootSoldier@hexbear.net 40 points 3 months ago

You make an enemy out of your best friend.

Your movie bombs at the box office.

Your president drops out of the race.

[-] AmericaDeserved711@hexbear.net 28 points 3 months ago

I seriously doubt that Jack Black truly cared that much about Biden, he just wanted to beat Trump or whatever. libs are more than happy to support Kamala instead since she has a better chance

[-] LaGG_3@hexbear.net 23 points 3 months ago

Unfortunately, he'll be fine. There's always going to be mario 2 and Jumanji: We've Made a Literal Jungle of Sequels.

[-] CommunistBear@hexbear.net 27 points 3 months ago

More likely it was for Kung Fu Panda money

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[-] oscardejarjayes@hexbear.net 50 points 3 months ago

Dead on arrival. It's not unexpected, it didn't seem like any Borderlands fans were hyped about the movie (and it's not like it has a massive fan-base, as compared to other games), and the casting choices don't really seem to fit the characters.

Considering all that, I'm a little surprised they spent so much on it, and released it, seems like they should've just aborted early.

[-] HumanBehaviorByBjork@hexbear.net 16 points 3 months ago

borderlands to me is a series designed to sell funko pops and that's it. i'm aware that there's gameplay based on drenching some damage sponges until a randomly generated gun pops out but it frankly sounds tiring.

[-] homicidalrobot@lemm.ee 20 points 3 months ago

This comment has the energy of a child who has never tried beef jerky explaining why beef jerky is probably terrible.

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[-] BeamBrain@hexbear.net 41 points 3 months ago

Eli Roth

Ah, yes, the director of the movie Green Inferno, where

CW: Racisma bunch of indigenous rights activists go to South America and get eaten by a cannibal tribe, haha DAE SJWs stupid and wouldn't it be funny if they got killed by the ones they try to defend, it sure would serve them right for not knowing that only white people are civilized

[-] TechnoUnionTypeBeat@hexbear.net 28 points 3 months ago

Oh jesus reading the plot synopsis was a horrible idea

Just some of the most racist shit mixed with some of the most absurd shit. Like the activist group going to protest the oil company or whatever in the jungle is funded by a drug dealer because y'know why not dial the racism to 11

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[-] roux@hexbear.net 17 points 3 months ago

Green Inferno? You mean Cannibal Ferox 2: the Cannibal Holocaustening?

I unironically thought that Thanksgiving was ok even though it was just My Bloody Valentine with cell phones.

[-] Diuretic_Materialism@hexbear.net 23 points 3 months ago

I honestly don't get the point of that movie. It seemed like Roth was just a fan of gory 70s horror movies and wanted to make an homage, but then he made the protagonists pro-indigenous right activists? But when people said that was weird and asked him wtf his point was he just dismissed the idea that there was anything political about the film... but you made the narrative choice to have the teens being killed be activists?

FYI in the OG Cannibal Holocaust the westerns who get slaughter actually provoke the tribe into it to make a exploitative documentary film, yeah they're still portrayed as brutal and savage but also you get the impression they were only really savage to each other until these assholes showed up. Still a fucked up movie but at least it was being made under the pretext of just being a mindless exploitative horror movie.

[-] roux@hexbear.net 12 points 3 months ago

For sure CH's message was that the westerners were the monsters. I was just trying to be cheeky that GI was very much just another cannibal movie. Similar to how Thanksgiving was just an 80s slasher. Roth basically just makes old movies and people keep giving him money to do it.

[-] Diuretic_Materialism@hexbear.net 11 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

It just seems so weird to me, like the oil company is legit intruding on the tribe's land and killing them, so is the message "even if they have a fucked up culture that doesn't justify colonialism"? But I don't buy Roth was trying to send such a nuanced message with his gory cannibal horror movie. If you wanna make a gory 70s horror movie maybe just, idk, switch the tribe with like some inbred hillbilly family, that'd still be problematic in it's own right but at least would have some many weird implications.

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[-] SorosFootSoldier@hexbear.net 40 points 3 months ago

Movie has a woman and a political race man.

Bombs at the box office.

Go woke, go broke smuglord

[-] Evilsandwichman@hexbear.net 21 points 3 months ago

No, stop, they come here for ideas, don't give them ideas! We'll see youtube videos saying this for years to come! Delete this!

[-] Belly_Beanis@hexbear.net 38 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

Eli Roth

Between him and Zach Snyder, I don't know who's worse. No idea how either of them get funding to make movies. At least Snyder I hear is great to work with because he buys all the catering?

[-] AmericaDeserved711@hexbear.net 33 points 3 months ago

I'd say Roth is definitely worse because he hasn't made a single movie worth watching. Snyder hasn't done anything good in a long while but there's some fun to be had with 300, Sucker Punch, and Watchmen despite some pretty major flaws.

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[-] kleeon@hexbear.net 36 points 3 months ago

Makes sense. Borderlands movie just sounds like a deeply stupid idea

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[-] roux@hexbear.net 35 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

As soon as I saw the cast, I figured it was gonna crash and burn. I hate seeing this happen to one of my favorite franchises but holy fucking shit, they couldn't have done anything to save this. Jamie Lee Curtis as Tannis? Were they like "she's skinny with short hair. Perfect!" and that was it? Could they have picked someone actually funny to play Claptrap? I honestly think the least offensive choice out of the bunch was Kevin Hart. But like also why did they go with Eli Roth. Were they like we'll forgive you for Hostel and Green Inferno if you make this masterclass in cinema happen?

Also having Krieg just be in there feels so random. They could have written in Gaige, Mordecai, or even Axton. Kreig without Maya backstory just seems like a cheap gimmick.

I'm still gonna fucking watch this slop too...

E: lol kill me

[-] AmericaDeserved711@hexbear.net 32 points 3 months ago

I straight up do not understand people who watch cam rips, let alone of this movie but you do you I guess

[-] roux@hexbear.net 20 points 3 months ago

It's a self-loathing thing lol.

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[-] Beetle_O_Rourke@hexbear.net 20 points 3 months ago

Kevin hart as (canonically) stoic soldier boy is a crime.

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[-] RyanGosling@hexbear.net 34 points 3 months ago

Don’t listen to losers. You can know the quality of something by judging its cover 95% of the time. And that looks atrocious.

[-] Inui@hexbear.net 28 points 3 months ago

It was doomed when the trailer hit. People who don't know what Borderlands is won't care and people who do weren't gonna see it just based on the cast list.

[-] Black_Mald_Futures@hexbear.net 20 points 3 months ago

They cast some big beefy soldier guy as

Kevin hart

[-] RyanGosling@hexbear.net 24 points 3 months ago

I think it could’ve been played up ironically, but the problem is that Kevin Hart plays himself in every movie, so I’m gonna assume he’s the same here

[-] Evilsandwichman@hexbear.net 11 points 3 months ago

I genuinely felt it hard to see the cast list and be impressed, but I thought maybe if the movie was good I'd see it, but the trailers (which are supposed to show the best parts) were just showing nonstop action and made me feel like there's no difference between this movie and just any generic action movie. I was tempted to watch it despite the casting, but the trailer and the action clips on youtube just put me off completely. I usually don't trust reviews (I watch horror movies; a lot of the stuff I like has terrible ratings) but I'm gonna trust them on this one.

[-] HelluvaBottomCarter@hexbear.net 33 points 3 months ago

Miscast and you really need a Luc Besson, James Gunn, Matthew Vaughn, or maybe an Edgar Wright to direct. Borderlands isn't popular enough for any of them to take on the project. Gunn already did his ensemble sci-fi space adventure movies. Valerian came close in some areas to the tone of Borderlands.

Someone just needs to take the franchise away from Randy.

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[-] Diuretic_Materialism@hexbear.net 32 points 3 months ago

I literally had not heard a peep about this movie till now.

[-] Redcuban1959@hexbear.net 32 points 3 months ago

Wait, theres a Borderlands movie?

[-] roux@hexbear.net 34 points 3 months ago

I mean not really.

[-] LocalOaf@hexbear.net 31 points 3 months ago
[-] barrbaric@hexbear.net 17 points 3 months ago
[-] LocalOaf@hexbear.net 17 points 3 months ago

I always thought the picture of Mike Stoklasa in the little haunted house ride car would make a good emote for something

[-] Chronicon@hexbear.net 16 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)
[-] LocalOaf@hexbear.net 15 points 3 months ago

LARGE ✔️ ADULT ✔️ MIDWESTERN ✔️ SON ✔️

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[-] WhatDoYouMeanPodcast@hexbear.net 29 points 3 months ago

But Hollywood has invested 1312 million dollars into video game and TTG IP movie adaptations! They were supposed to print money! porky-scared-flipped

The money line will go down and it will go down bigly! Trump needs to get in office so he can sue consumers for abstaining from movies.

[-] roux@hexbear.net 20 points 3 months ago

Protip: make movies based on IP that actually follow the games instead of making multi-million dollar cardboard cutouts doused in CGI.

[-] Alaskaball@hexbear.net 28 points 3 months ago

It was great watching this slow moving trainwreck arrive absolutely thrashed and trashed at the train station from the very first moment its existence was announced to the public

[-] JoeByeThen@hexbear.net 27 points 3 months ago

It was low as 8 on Rotten tomatoes. data-laughing

[-] AmericaDeserved711@hexbear.net 27 points 3 months ago

the most common rating on letterboxd is one star lmao

I can't remember the last time a major studio film did this bad both critically and commercially. this shit cost $120 million to make

[-] JoeByeThen@hexbear.net 16 points 3 months ago

Lol, I don't go to movies much nowadays but I saw The Last Airbender in theaters on opening day. Getting the same energy.

[-] LaGG_3@hexbear.net 21 points 3 months ago

Borderlands is groundbreaking. It's the first big budget movie made since 2020 that you are extremely unlikely to contract Covid from watching it in the theater.

[-] EmmaGoldman@hexbear.net 20 points 3 months ago

cap-think Hey, who should we get to play our characters in this franchise where people are lucky to make it to 35 and most of our main characters are in their 20s or younger?

thinky-felix What if we hire a bunch of Medicare beneficiaries?

porky-happy Since they're already getting Social Security payments, we can get away with paying them scale!

[-] VHS@hexbear.net 19 points 3 months ago
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[-] GrouchyGrouse@hexbear.net 16 points 3 months ago

Step 1: Make videogame that looks like cartoon.

Step 2: make movie about cartoon videogame but not a cartoon

Step 3: success ? ? ?

[-] Egon@hexbear.net 13 points 3 months ago

This movie seems like the result of some J. Jonah Jameson type guy smoking cigars seeing the succes of the last of us going "capeshit is done! The people want video games now!"
He still gets a bonus and he gets a promotion because in the '90s he said people wanted movies about boats and then they made Titanic

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this post was submitted on 11 Aug 2024
81 points (100.0% liked)

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