Because talking = socializing, and socializing is a core concept in the human brain which evolved with the need for a community to live in, which is easier to do when you socialize with its members. So for our society socializing = good. Not socializing = bad.
And it suuucks ass.
Hey how's it going? No, don't actually tell me how it's going.
Boy... the weather sure is outside! Being alone with my thoughts scares me, so I will make dealing with me your new unpaid job.
What’d you do this weekend? If it takes more than two sentences to describe it to me I’ll stop caring and just talk about myself. I’m not here to learn about you, just drown out the incessant ticking of my own mortality.
I wish people would give me more than two sentences. I kinda need more than two sentences to start opening up, and once I do, I will not stop talking until I'm tired. My brain will never run out of things to ramble about, so feel free to be like, "hey, can we move onto another subject?" if you've lost interest.
I think it's really ironic when I see these memes, because it highlights how our own heads will highlight the things that grate against our own nerves.
I assume everybody that this resonates with resonates with it because they themselves have been told to go against their nature and wanna know why the other side hasn't.
I'm the other end of that spectrum. I promise you, people told me all that. "Mind your peers. Share the space. Stop being...so much. Learn to be comfortable in silences. What can't you shut the fuck up?"
I have autism, so I didn't understand why I was always screwing it up. I also hated hearing, "Be yourself. People will like you for who you are," because I found that when I stopped trying to mask, I'd immediately hear all of the above all over again.
My MIL is this kind of extrovert. She assumes that if someone isn't constantly talking to her that they hate her.
Look lady: I love your daughter to death! I love you to death! I DON'T HAVE ANY NEW DEVELOPMENTS IN MY LIFE!! And you KNOW that!! Trust me, when I do, I WILL LET YOU KNOW!! In the meantime, business as usual and I don't have any opinions on anything outside of my purview!
I swear, if ever she was forced to sit in front of a group of people in silence, her head might explode.
As somebody with social anxiety, it sounds like your MIL also has social anxiety. Hence, the constant need to have to reinforce that other people can stand her. I had to train this out of myself in my late teens/early 20s.
I know it's annoying to deal with, but showing a little compassion and simply affirming that you're exhausted but her relationship with you is secure will go a long way for her. She'll probably get used to you being quiet around her too.
Social anxiety + extroversion is its own special hell.
Because the worst of us all run everything, and you gotta just deal with it wage slave.
You don't consent to being born. You are forced here and are a prisoner of your living expenses.
I went to an introvert's munch once. It was held at a public library. Everyone just nodded and smiled at each other as they read books. No one spoke to anyone. It was amusing as performance art but it was a shitty munch.
How does one munch at a library? Isn't that usually frowned upon?
It's just the name of a particular kind of social get-together.
Oh I see, interesting. I guess they're named after the fact that normally they're at a restaurant?
The Wikipedia article was...interesting. The first paragraph of the "history" section seemed like someone had removed a sentence at random. "After that initial meeting", without ever having described any first meeting, but having set the stage where such a first meeting might take place. If someone has knowledge & sources about that first meeting, that'd be a great opportunity to improve Wikipedia.
Even librarians love snacks
What’s a munch? I feel like this is a set up
I mean, that sounds like a really nice social event. I assume that whatever a munch is doesn't jive with flourishing introverts.
I've been trying to find activities I can do on my own. I like being on my own and doing stuff by myself. But when I look up "fun things to do as an extrovert" and the results are pages of "how to not be an extrovert". Like ffs I like being an introvert, why this obsession with changing my personality style and trying to force me to be something I'm not
Try "alone" or "by yourself" instead of "introvert." (I assume that's the word you meant.)
I'm neither introverted nor extroverted, but I do shit alone every day!
Found a new trail to hike by my house, along with the miles of "wild" trails in the woods here. Just got back from a 4-mile.
Yesterday I kayaked a couple of miles in the local swamp. Saw beautiful things!
Also, I lay in bed and read everyday, even if my wife is there. If she wants TV? Ear plugs, I'm basically alone.
EDIT: Forgot to add: I found these things to do simply by poking around on Google Maps, seeing what was around me. Not "official" places, just looking at geography. It's free.
Cycling, role playing games, hiking groups, theater, local, community, local community theater, fascism, beating up people I don't like
I try this every day but it doesn’t work. Extros gonna extro.
Looks cool man but as an extreme introvert, I worry about the false dichotomy of intro/extro. I'm fucked up and isolated because that's what I want. I'm also decent at interpersonal relations, but it hurts my brain to do sales. Because I don't want you to buy the thing I am trying to sell you.
Sales hurting your brain is only indicative of a healthy moral compass
If you can find a product you actually believe in, sales can be pretty nice
Being an ambivert is nice lol
Hot take: This is gonna sound conceited to introverts but “shutting the fuck up so others can talk and contribute” IS society forcing extroverts to do exactly what you said. When an extrovert isn’t talking they are probably deliberately holding back because it’s socially polite
this isn't even about 'letting others talk'. it's just nice to have moments where folk can simply be in each other's company and not be required to converse
Extroverts can listen, it is the overall interaction that they crave.
