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[-] Hayduke@lemmy.world 265 points 2 years ago

The department is working tirelessly to apprehend the criminals.

[-] CuriousRefugee@lemmy.ml 149 points 2 years ago

"Stop laughing," the department chief said in an interview with WLMY. "This is a wheel problem for us."

[-] thefartographer@lemm.ee 53 points 2 years ago

The officers have been reviewing security footage before beginning material investigations so that they can hit the ground running.

[-] anubis119@lemmy.world 46 points 2 years ago

They aren't having a goodyear anymore.

[-] FigMcLargeHuge@sh.itjust.works 12 points 2 years ago

As to the suspects, at this time we are keeping our opinions unbiased.

[-] EtherWhack@lemmy.world 8 points 2 years ago

But they keep shifting their stance

[-] dohpaz42@lemmy.world 7 points 2 years ago

Eventually their investigation will come to a skidding halt, as they are burning rubber trying to find the suspects.

[-] P00ptart@lemmy.world 1 points 2 years ago

Let's take a brake from this tired thread.

[-] WhyFlip@lemmy.world 98 points 2 years ago

They're working tirelessly to find the perpetrators.

[-] BonesOfTheMoon@lemmy.world 16 points 2 years ago

I could just kiss you.

[-] Nasan@sopuli.xyz 76 points 2 years ago

Return just the wheels, the tires need to be examined further and will take an additional 6-18 business months

[-] EtherWhack@lemmy.world 39 points 2 years ago

Just cut them open, plenty of smugglers put bricks of product inside.

[-] ininewcrow@lemmy.ca 50 points 2 years ago

They weren't stolen .... they can be fetched and returned from their last known location in Afghanistan

[-] Etienne_Dahu@jlai.lu 43 points 2 years ago

All because the wheels were black.

[-] FlashMobOfOne@lemmy.world 35 points 2 years ago
[-] ZombiFrancis@sh.itjust.works 32 points 2 years ago

After six months the tires are sent to the city dump.

City Waste Landfill? City Police Precinct? Easy mistake when all these departments just look the same, you know.

[-] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 30 points 2 years ago

Ah yes, forfeiture of their assets. This sounds familiar somehow...

[-] explodicle@sh.itjust.works 12 points 2 years ago

Those tires are criminals.

[-] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 8 points 2 years ago

They should have complied with the road.

[-] Hydra_Fk@reddthat.com 2 points 2 years ago

They were "radial" profiling them!

[-] Hydra_Fk@reddthat.com -2 points 2 years ago

Tires can't be criminals, they are inanimate objects. Only humans and some higher intelligent animals can break the law.

[-] Snowclone@lemmy.world 8 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)

You'd think that but in the American legal system corporations are civil rights bearing people, you're not related to your parents unless you maintain the same address, and objects can be suspected and tried for criminal acts and assumed guilty until proven otherwise.

[-] Hydra_Fk@reddthat.com 2 points 2 years ago

When was the last time a corp was sentenced to death and executed?

[-] desktop_user@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 2 years ago

that isn't the point, also the death penalty is almost never used anyway

[-] Hydra_Fk@reddthat.com 3 points 2 years ago

My point is they are super citizens, with more rights and privileges and less things binding them.

[-] Snowclone@lemmy.world 1 points 2 years ago

The argument that corporations have civil rights is how the Supreme Court justified eliminating anti bribery laws that curtailed political funding from corporations.

[-] gearheart@lemm.ee 6 points 2 years ago

Bet your lots of fun at parties , 😉.

[-] Hydra_Fk@reddthat.com 2 points 2 years ago

Lol if you only knew.

[-] bamfic@lemmy.world 12 points 2 years ago

Stop resisting!

[-] UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world 12 points 2 years ago

Based and Legalism Pilled

[-] woodenskewer@lemmy.world 9 points 2 years ago

civil axle forfeiture

this post was submitted on 18 Oct 2024
1366 points (98.9% liked)

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