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[-] southsamurai@sh.itjust.works 96 points 2 weeks ago

I used to date a lady that would, during foreplay, comment that I really needed to ejaculate bad. Not the exact wording used, but it was still a little weird. Not weird enough to break my stride, because it was true enough, and with her working the pieces parts that would lead up such an event, it could have been extremely weird, and I would have been okay with it.

This goes on for months before she finally said, "I don't know how it fills up so fast, we just did it an hour ago.", during a rather busy weekend that included a great deal of ejaculation. I asked her what was filling up so fast. She said "your balls, they just get so big when they're full."

This lovely, wonderful lady had made it into her early thirties under the impression that all of the semen was produced and stored in the testicles, filling them up continuously. She was also under the impression that testicles would rupture if not drained regularly.

She attributed this to something she had overhead someone say in jr high, and had apparently never figured out otherwise.

It kinda makes sense. Why would the sack be so big and stretchy if it didn't need to hold balls that would expand. And why would guys have different sized ones if some of them weren't draining them more often than others.

The ensuing conversation was a difficult one. Partially because it stopped the previous activity, partially because she had a lot of questions, and partially because it wasn't clear if the frequency with which she wanted to prevent my testicles from exploding would decrease.

Luckily, the conversation went very well, and they did eventually explode in the usual way, which was much more entertaining for her than before, she said. It also led to a lot of fun as she developed an almost fetish about feeling the event happen whenever activity would make that possible.

[-] massive_bereavement@fedia.io 65 points 2 weeks ago

There's a line of perv guys that tell girls that if they don't ejaculate it will be painful and it may cause health issues, mostly as a way of coercing for sex.

[-] umbrella@lemmy.ml 20 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

my balls hurt if i go too long without emptying them, yes

is that... not normal?

[-] slacktoid@lemmy.ml 21 points 2 weeks ago

Yes but it's the coercion that's the problem.

[-] umbrella@lemmy.ml 4 points 2 weeks ago

thats fair.

[-] southsamurai@sh.itjust.works 10 points 2 weeks ago

Sure, that's normal

It's calles epididymal hypertension. Aka blue balls.

The blood flow combined with the tension of the tissues caused during the preparation for sexual activity causes the part of the testicles that stores spermatzoa to experience discomfort.

[-] lightnsfw@reddthat.com 8 points 2 weeks ago

If you jerk off and don't finish maybe but even that goes away after a bit. Otherwise not really... I've gone weeks and it didn't hurt.

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[-] FauxLiving@lemmy.world 10 points 2 weeks ago

There are manipulative people, of both sexes, who lie for sex.

That being said, Epididymal Hypertension (aka blue balls) is a real thing and not an urban legend only used to manipulate people.

[-] massive_bereavement@fedia.io 6 points 2 weeks ago

As I would say: Buddy, there's your hand and there's the bathroom and if you need it, here's the wifi password.

[-] FauxLiving@lemmy.world 5 points 2 weeks ago

Sure, it doesn't entitle anyone to sex.

I was just pointing out that it's just not as simple as "That's just a thing people say to guilt trip others into sex."

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[-] Okokimup@lemmy.world 26 points 2 weeks ago

Wholesome sex story.

[-] SoleInvictus@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 points 2 weeks ago

This totally made my day. Thank you!

[-] rikudou@lemmings.world 54 points 2 weeks ago

When two people kiss, they form a long tube from one anus to another.

[-] Tiptopit@feddit.org 34 points 2 weeks ago

While two people, sitting on toilets interconnected by sewer pipes, form a long tube from one mouth to another.

[-] smeg@feddit.uk 28 points 2 weeks ago

I'm not sure you're supposed to form an air-tight seal around the toilet bowl, but if your farts are that bad then thank you for your consideration

[-] pupbiru@aussie.zone 10 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

sewer systems aren’t air tight either - they need to let gasses escape, so i think even without an airtight seal if we consider a sewer in general a pipe system of this category it’s fair to consider the connection between butt and toilet also part of this system

many people have a special wireless connection, which explains the sewage that spews from their mouth

[-] Franklin@lemmy.ca 11 points 2 weeks ago

if you have more than one toilet you can start a LAN party

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[-] ininewcrow@lemmy.ca 39 points 2 weeks ago

From Robin Williams describing the reproductive system ....

"What was god thinking when he designed humans? .... let's put the waste disposal system next to the entertainment system!"

[-] rockerface@lemm.ee 16 points 2 weeks ago

Don't even get me started on breathing and eating through the same set of tubes

[-] Obi@sopuli.xyz 4 points 2 weeks ago

I'm convinced this is how I'll die, I regularly get it down the wrong hatch and some day that piece of chicken or whatever will just be a bit too big to get it out/in again... Now that I think about it, it hasn't happened in a while, maybe just so I let my guard down...

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[-] bluebadoo@lemmy.world 37 points 2 weeks ago
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[-] over_clox@lemmy.world 29 points 2 weeks ago

Meanwhile, there have been very rare instances of women getting pregnant from getting fucked in the ass.

Hey, some people have subtle deformities allowing fluids and such to travel where they usually don't..

[-] Kyrgizion@lemmy.world 28 points 2 weeks ago

Transanal-transvaginal fistulae. That was a bad day to have eyes, or the ability to read. Ah well.

[-] SomGye@dormi.zone 9 points 2 weeks ago

No more poophole-loophole :(

[-] qkalligula@my-place.social 6 points 2 weeks ago

@over_clox @fossilesque genuinely before this message i just assumed it dripped to the yaya. I wonder if that is how Brittany Spear's sister(i think?) got pregnant.

[-] ChicoSuave@lemmy.world 14 points 2 weeks ago
[-] PlasticExistence@lemmy.world 4 points 2 weeks ago

The word itself makes some men uncomfortable. They don't like hearing it and find it difficult to say. Whereas without batting an eye a man will refer to his "dick" or his "rod" or his "Johnson".

[-] higgsboson@dubvee.org 5 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)
[-] PlasticExistence@lemmy.world 6 points 2 weeks ago

Do you like sex, Mr. Lebowski? The physical act of love. Coitus. Do you like it?

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[-] WhatSay@slrpnk.net 22 points 2 weeks ago

And that, is why it feels good to fart.

[-] prinzmegahertz@lemm.ee 21 points 2 weeks ago

The poor man’s orgasm

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[-] wwb4itcgas@lemm.ee 14 points 2 weeks ago

I honestly would've thought that an orifice to release waste products came first, but I'm not an evo-devo-nist.

[-] ChaoticNeutralCzech@feddit.org 9 points 2 weeks ago

Yeah, the first thing the embryo of vertebrates folds into is a torus whose hole will become the digestive system. Reproductive organs come way later.

[-] Confused_Emus@lemmy.dbzer0.com 14 points 2 weeks ago

So very early in our development we’re just an asshole. Some people apparently never make it past this stage.

[-] Manticore@lemmy.nz 7 points 2 weeks ago

Yeah it feels like a weird way to say that humans still have vestigial signs of a cloaca. It's understood that evolutionary ancestors did, so humans' ancestors would need to have separated the functions during their evolution... I guess the news is that there is still genetic evidence even today.

Alternatively, creationists can take this as a sign a creator considers butt stuff to be natural sex also 👍

[-] pupbiru@aussie.zone 4 points 2 weeks ago

i think the creationist response is that humans were always exactly like this and any evidence pointing to the contrary is put there by god to test us

… but also worth a try - it’s not like they actually think about things

[-] Manticore@lemmy.nz 4 points 2 weeks ago

God doesn't make mistakes 😇🙏 that's why butt stuff 🍑🤛💦 feels so good 🥴😩💯

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[-] Biggles@lemmy.myserv.one 12 points 2 weeks ago

I really commend the creativity and dedication to detail the graphic artist took on this spectacularly breathtaking image.

[-] kruhmaster@sh.itjust.works 8 points 2 weeks ago

WHO ARE ALL THE PEOPLE ASKING THIS QUESTION???

[-] over_clox@lemmy.world 3 points 2 weeks ago

What question might that be?

Where boobies come from?

Where booties come from?

🤔

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[-] exasperation@lemm.ee 6 points 2 weeks ago

The anus may have evolved from a hole originally used to release sperm

But whose sperm are we talking about here?

[-] flamingo_pinyata@sopuli.xyz 5 points 2 weeks ago

What is it with vertebrates and combining reproductive organs with the out-end of the digestive system? Don't they get it's gross?

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this post was submitted on 29 Mar 2025
292 points (96.8% liked)

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