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Do you have clean underwear on, punk? Your momma warned you about today.
(I'm not very good at this)
This is so insane when you think about it.
You're in hospital, and your mom is really worrying about your dirty underwear?
She's not. She's just using that argument to not speak the truth: That it's disgusting to not keep yourself clean and she's ashamed of your (probably) poop stained underwear.
Teenagers truly can be disgusting. It's hard to tell them though. Even harder is, when this applies to grown ups.
Growing up means to realise that even the hurtful thing's people said to you, where probably just said because they care for you. (Not everyone cares obviously) Parents live their first life too.
I'll show you true human nature.
There's no way I'd waste that moment on something serious.
"Skibidi", which would be funny because I'm not that young.
"And when I get to Heaven,
To St Peter I will tell;
Quarter pounder cheese and a big mac please,
And a side of fries as well."
Whoops, had the timer upside down.
There shall be light.
BONZAI!
Would work best if we're in an aircraft and there's a tiny plant nearby, though.
Nothing. Just walk away slowly. Doi.
Oh crap, I should've thought of a cool quote before pressing the but
Delete my browsing history!
There's so many good stories where some brave hero has to give their life to save the day, and because of their sacrifice, the good guys win, the survivors cheer, and everyone lives happily ever after. But the hero never gets to see the ending. They'll never know if their sacrifice actually made a difference. They'll never know if the day was really saved. In the end, they just have to have faith.
Ain’t that a bitch?
Okay, I know this is a really bad idea but I'm already here so Here we fucking go... RAWR!!
x3 nuzzles! pounces on you uwu you so warm Couldn’t help but notice your buldge from across the floor Nuzzles yo' necky wecky-tilda murr-tilda hehe Unzips yo baggy ass pants, oof baby you so musky Take me home, pet me, 'n’ make me yours and don't forget to stuff me! See me wag my widdle baby tail all for your buldgy-wuldgy! Kissies 'n' lickies yo neck I hope daddy likies Nuzzles 'n' wuzzles yo chest (yuh) I be (yeah) gettin' thirsty
Hey, I got a little itch, you think you can help me? Only seven inches long uwu PLEASE ADOPT ME Paws on your buldge as I lick my lips (uwu punish me please) 'Boutta hit ’em with this furry shit (he don’t see it comin')
Fuck. Now I will never know how that book ends
Pasta la vista, baby.
It would be feeble but something like "It's time to fix this mistakes!".
I don't do this to save them, I do this to release you from your wretched vows and commit your memory to the eternal flames. may we both burn brightly in hell.
in a less serious tone
Hey, Listen!
Sir, permission to leave the station.
"What time is love?"
Is it the green wire or the red wire? Oopsie!
I know what you're thinking. Did he 'splode six bombs or only five? Well, to tell you the truth, in all this excitement, I've kinda lost track myself. But being as this is a Tsar Bomba AN602, the most powerful bomb in the world, and would blow your nuts clean off, you've got to ask yourself one question: "Do I feel lucky?" Well, do ya, punk?”
I'm not even supposed to be here today!
What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. Except for muscle wasting diseases. But this, this'll definitely kill you.
Revenge is a dish best served cold and I'm coming for you like a bowl of gazpacho soup!
I’m your huckleberry pie.
"Let's see if this time it fails, unlike the other times"
Somebody set up us the bomb!
I did a quick search and was shocked to find zero hits to
"Superman".
farts
You always were an asshole Gormon.
I thought exactly that! She was a badass
Make THIS great, asshole!
I don't have to pay rent in two days.
He who is valiant and pure of spirit may find the holy grail in the castle of aaaughhh
this post was submitted on 29 Apr 2025
66 points (94.6% liked)
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