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submitted 1 month ago by happybadger@hexbear.net to c/news@hexbear.net

US President Donald Trump says that the US is going to start "BLOCKADING any and all Ships trying to enter, or leave, the Strait of Hormuz".

In a lengthy new post on Truth Social, he says that "the meeting went well, most points were agreed to, but the only point that really mattered, NUCLEAR, was not".

He says that "at some point" an agreement on free passage will be reached, but "Iran has not allowed that to happen by merely saying, 'There may be a mine out there somewhere,' that nobody knows about but them."

In the same post Trump also says that he's "instructed our Navy to seek and interdict every vessel in International Waters that has paid a toll to Iran", and that the US Navy is going to start " destroying the mines the Iranians laid in the Straits".

"No one who pays an illegal toll will have safe passage on the high seas," he says, adding "any Iranian who fires at us, or at peaceful vessels, will be BLOWN TO HELL!"

"The Blockade will begin shortly," he says.

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[-] came_apart_at_Kmart@hexbear.net 91 points 1 month ago

"we will re-open the strait of hormuz by adding an even bigger blockade to it and doing piracy to everyone." - Strategic Genius

seems absolutely guaranteed to ratchet up tensions with every country on the planet while creating the ideal conditions for recruiting every other country to join any kind of anti-US led coalition. not to mention, it seems likely to make the looming "stroke" of global energy markets turn into a major seizure by inducing even more panic and uncertainty, everywhere.

the people who come up with this crap cannot grasp the basic idea of multi-polar world, otherwise they wouldn't be taking the clumsiest steps to rapidly accelerate its development. the republic of iran has exposed the weakness of the US by fighting back once cornered and refusing to accept the US' perennially mendacious, tactical "diplomacy". it's absolutely the worst time to threaten everyone on earth simultaneously.

[-] happybadger@hexbear.net 74 points 1 month ago

It might be the worst strategic decision I can think of since Hitler drawing the US and USSR into the war. He's even declaring war on his own base during what looks like a bad midterm election. I didn't even think they'd do a counter-blockade because it's stupid in every single way a decision could be. JDPON Don is going to win the PLA's highest medals for their victory against the US in a war they aren't fighting.

[-] miz@hexbear.net 69 points 1 month ago
[-] BodyBySisyphus@hexbear.net 33 points 1 month ago

Ready for dems to eat shit in the midterms because they refuse to take a firm stance on ending the war?

[-] CthulhusIntern@hexbear.net 23 points 1 month ago

We can no longer even lathe things, because things are getting too stupid to lathe.

[-] CyborgMarx@hexbear.net 75 points 1 month ago

This isn't just a continuation of the war against Iran, but a declaration of war against any country that relies on those energy flows

Southeast Asia about to eat shit

[-] BoxedFenders@hexbear.net 42 points 1 month ago

The US is helping the Global South speed up their Chinamaxxing Solarpilled era.

[-] peeonyou@hexbear.net 15 points 1 month ago

Yet the US was planning to use bases in those countries to fight the war against China and defend Taiwan. Curious.

[-] AssortedBiscuits@hexbear.net 29 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

The Philippines has already agreed to reset relations with China and agreed to various joint oil and gas exploration deals with China. And this is all because the US decided to war with Iran.

[-] peeonyou@hexbear.net 14 points 1 month ago

this is good

[-] sharkfucker420@lemmy.ml 70 points 1 month ago

Sometimes I wonder if the fall of capitalism will be easier than we thought

[-] Collatz_problem@hexbear.net 54 points 1 month ago

Capitalists are selling rope already tied as a noose.

[-] CthulhusIntern@hexbear.net 25 points 1 month ago

And they're demonstrating the ropes' effectiveness by jumping in the noose, before the sale has even closed.

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[-] happybadger@hexbear.net 66 points 1 month ago

Operation Driving Drunk To Another Intervention And Screaming I'm Not An Alcoholic And To Prove It To Everyone I Guess I Have To Drink An Entire Bottle Of Vodka And Show That I Just Have A Naturally High Tolerance Unlike You Fucking Alcoholics Who Can't Drive On Four Beers Fuck It Alright Make It A Bottle Of Vodka And A Bottle Of Vodka If You Don't Believe Me None Of You Ever Fucking Believe Me And It's So Stressful That I Need A Drink Before I Do This

[-] LeeeroooyJeeenkiiins@hexbear.net 12 points 1 month ago

Happybadger god damn you're going to have to start getting royalties for all the hexbear taglines you generate

[-] Beaver@hexbear.net 56 points 1 month ago
[-] LeeeroooyJeeenkiiins@hexbear.net 17 points 1 month ago

Somebody help that poor man!

[-] nasezero@hexbear.net 53 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

The best and most strategic choice for the US was to never bomb Iran. Having failed that, the absolute best and most rational choice for the US is now to accept their current position and withdraw from West Asia entirely. The worst case scenario (still speaking strategically for the US, specifically) we thought would be the US doubling-down and bombing enough Iranian infrastructure which would prompt Iran to retaliate and blow up remaining GCC infrastructure, which would most people agreed would plunge the global economy into a terrible depression and cause widespread famine. But this scenario seems equally as likely to do that, assuming it goes on for long enough, without Iran having to have their infrastructure bombed, plus all the additional political fallout from it being so directly imposed by the US. And even if it doesn't last (kinda doubt it will), it still just looks like terrible and desperate behavior coming from the US.

I had this thought when the US first attacked Iran, that we really truly cannot underestimate how incompetent these clowns are, but even I keep being surprised at how profoundly fucking smooth these peoples brains are. We must reach new depths with our predictions; I'm now all in the US canceling elections and doing a draft with ICE enforcement that ends up causing the collapse of the state by 2028.

[-] rubber_chicken@hexbear.net 34 points 1 month ago

Like trying to guess the most wrong answer you'll get to a question and some student just eating the test.

[-] marxisthayaca@hexbear.net 19 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Are they evil, or genuinely stupid? It's worse: both.

[-] SorosFootSoldier@hexbear.net 45 points 1 month ago

Oh yeah well I'll do a blockade of my own but better and sexier!

[-] happybadger@hexbear.net 33 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

I'm not blockaded I'm not blockaded YOUR BLOCKADED

[-] tactical_trans_karen@hexbear.net 25 points 1 month ago

With blackjack, and hookers!

[-] woodenghost@hexbear.net 44 points 1 month ago

Wow, Richard Medhurst really called it. The US is in it's pirate phase.

[-] LeeeroooyJeeenkiiins@hexbear.net 15 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Trump keeps hearing live action Luffy say he'll be the king of the pirates and it's makin him so angry

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[-] Bloobish@hexbear.net 42 points 1 month ago

timmy-pray please let a carrier be sunk, that would be amazing

[-] miz@hexbear.net 19 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

images of distressed crying US navy soldiers being pulled out of the water by IRGC fastboats please

[-] Ildsaye@hexbear.net 16 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

mystery-emote holden-bloodfeast
Commissar Belden Hullreef
- 1917 years old
- inshallah just let us sink a US
carrier, nothing else matters,
I'll do anything please I just
want to see images of
distressed crying US navy
soldiers being pulled out of
the water by IRGC fastboats
please before I die
- respectable antisectarian

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[-] peeonyou@hexbear.net 19 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

this is all i've been asking for.. why is it so much to ask for?

[-] FnordPrefect@hexbear.net 42 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

kelly Block-aiding

[-] SerialExperimentsGay@hexbear.net 37 points 1 month ago

now i get why they clogged the toilets on that aircraft carrier, it was practice for blocking the strait and for eating shit

[-] MayoPete@hexbear.net 34 points 1 month ago

Warehouse fire challenge is now U.S. naval fire challenge 🔥🔥🔥

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[-] barrbaric@hexbear.net 29 points 1 month ago

99% chance this is just Trump saying shit, but please send a carrier into the strait to demine it.

[-] ClassIsOver@hexbear.net 27 points 1 month ago

Putting US navy ships in place to get hit seems like the same sort of issue they'd face by "escorting container ships through the strait", right?

[-] happybadger@hexbear.net 38 points 1 month ago

Somehow it's worse. If they're interdicting ships, they're stopped or slowed. If they're escorting ships they're moving at a higher speed and can set an evasive course around them. This has the problems of Stupid Gallipoli where all the ships have to concentrate in one place as static targets.

[-] chgxvjh@hexbear.net 27 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

So is the US Navy going to attack chinese tankers?

[-] LaughingLion@hexbear.net 19 points 1 month ago

AFAIK know the Chinese aren't paying tolls. That's the benefits of being homies.

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[-] infuziSporg@hexbear.net 25 points 1 month ago

If he was smart he would have gotten out in front with this on February 27th.

Now he is stuck giving Iran the "highest form of flattery".

[-] poppy_apocalypse@hexbear.net 23 points 1 month ago

Now that he has destroyed all the targets and eliminated Iran's water boats, he needs a new challenge

[-] kristina@hexbear.net 22 points 1 month ago

Fuck France haha

[-] ConcreteHalloween@hexbear.net 21 points 1 month ago

"You can't blockade me! I'll blockade you!"

[-] Aquilae@hexbear.net 21 points 1 month ago

"If you can't beat em, join em" ahh Trump

[-] segfault11@hexbear.net 17 points 1 month ago

can a geopolitics understander explain whether iran's proximity to turkey and russia (via the caspian sea) can help them absorb the effects on trade from the blockade

[-] happybadger@hexbear.net 20 points 1 month ago

Hopefully they can also explain why maritime insurance companies won't cover ships being escorted and won't cover ships going through freely, but they will cover ships being blockaded by two navies for two contradictory goals. And if they fulfill either goal of either navy blockading them, one side will blow them up and the other is the Pirate Empire. To me that seems more risky for the insurance companies underwriting global trade.

[-] KobaCumTribute@hexbear.net 13 points 1 month ago

Fuck, that's reminding me of how a blockade was held as only being "legal" if it was effective and consistently enforced, for the purposes of things like insurance payouts or lawsuits over seized vessels. I thought that was an outdated legal principle, but now I'm wondering if its not and this is some galaxy brain "look it's fucking blockaded for real now, do your payouts now because now this is a blockade, which is covered and legal" grift.

[-] Bronstein_Tardigrade@lemmygrad.ml 16 points 1 month ago

The US will block all traffic in the Strait of Hormuz, to retaliate against the Iranians for blocking all traffic in the Strait of Hormuz. Let me write the word "logic" inside this circle.

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[-] SkingradGuard@hexbear.net 16 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Wow Mr President this is so smart, don't chicken out like a woke liberal. Do it so much yes sir

[-] Leegh@hexbear.net 15 points 1 month ago

After failing to reopen a strait that was already open before he decided to start a war, JDPON Don now wants to close a strait that was already closed because of the war.

Strategic genius right here.

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this post was submitted on 12 Apr 2026
147 points (100.0% liked)

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