Asking where you are from is pretty normal conversation, especially if you have a noticeable accent. Asking where your parents/grandparents/etc are from is less common. Are you by chance not-white? Sometimes these sorts of questions have a race element to them
Yeah, asking where someone's from is completely normal but asking where their parents/family is from automatically sets off some racism red flags
I think I look pretty white, tbh
Well you either look or sound funny/different. I'd say since you get asked about grandparents etc it's not sound, so you don't look local Canadian.
This is often a proxy for a different question.
And that question is "why isn't your skin the same colour as mine?"
Well, if he's from Canada (as I am, no hate!), the answer is "We get like 4 hours of sunlight per day here." I wear shades to block the glare of my own reflection in the snow.
It's also a form of othering. You are different and they are establishing why
they're trying to figure out your race or whatever
He says in another comment that he's a white newfie, so, doubtful, unless he now lives in like, Kolkata. More likely, he has a slight accent or is just upset about small talk.
As a white guy myself, ~~white~~ all kinds of people constantly ask things like "where you from," in the same cadence of "nice weather we're having, huh?" It's a part of getting to know people, what's your name, where you from, what kind of music you into, etc. I don't think they're trying to find out if I am originally of Saxon or Angle stock, I think they're just trying to make small talk.
I would agree with you in when they ask where you’re from. Once they start asking where your parents and grandparents are from they’re trying to figure out your race. I also agree with you as a white guy I don’t usually get extra probing but there are a few, mostly older, that are trying to figure out what specific type of white. It occasionally ends with a comment about how some group isn’t really white even though they have light skin.
That's exactly what it is.
Light haired white people don't generally recieve this type of question.
Sounds like the correct answer to the question is Newfoundland, if it isn’t the accent it is probably some regional colloquialisms.
When someone asks me where I am from I normally say the city / province. I would never answer Canada while I was in Canada having the conversation.
They're either making conversation or racist, depending on context. Answering the country you're from if you're currently in that country is pretty odd.
But that is the answer to the question. I'm not understanding the alternative. If the person wants to ask, "What race are you?" They should ask using those words.
I can't recall a time ever needing to know anyone's race. So I've never asked this question in 50 years, but perhaps one day? Idk, seems like a potentially insensitive question.
I don't think being interested in the (ancestors') race of a co-worker is necessary racist. I worked with people with all kinds of cultural backgrounds and it might be just an interesting topic to talk about. If someone has family in Iran, Senegal or Indonesia that's definitely more interesting to me than a conversation about weather or last night's football game.
As a mixed third generation immigrant, I get this a lot. In my experience, most people want to know my ethnicity, but for some reason they never ask me that directly.
Yeah but that’s a somewhat sensitive topic. Asking for the region of origin might mean the same thing in practice, but asking someone what "breed" they are is very inappropriate.
Because it's none of their business and it's a tad racist, and they know racism is bad but they don't want to look as bad people.
It's not racist to be interested in where somebody is from.
It is if you assume that someone is from somewhere else because they don't look like you.
It's not racist to ask about ethnicity.
It would be racist to ask about ethnicity and then discriminate based on the response.
So are you autistic? Because the literal-mindedness of your answers and the lack of awareness of how to engage in small talk is telling. I say this as one on the spectrum myself; it took me a long time to understand this is just an attempt to establish social connections by finding points of commonality. "Oh, you're from Calgary? I used to live there, too! Did you know a store called Myth Games?" Neurotypical people are also waiting for you to ask the same things in return and often feel miffed if you don't show any curiosity about them.
Also autistic. I had the same thought about OP.
Before building my mask I was very similar (and probably pissed a lot of NTs off too lol).
Why would you say Canada? Is Canada homogenous from coast to coast? If I'm talking to people and getting to know where they are from zero of them say "america," because that doesn't give any information whatsoever, what do you even expect them to respond with? "Wow I'm from canada too!"
The follow up question could have been "where in Canada", but it decidedly wasn't
I'm a white Australian and I get asked this all the time. Mostly they're just trying to make conversation and since most people at work are migrants it's a natural conversation starter. Sometimes they are looking to remind me that the only real Australians are the indigenous peoples and I am, therefore, British. This what you get labelled if you say your background is English/Irish lol. My favourite was being called British by a mixed German/Brazilian who insisted he was Spanish.
In countries with a lot of immigration and diversity I think it's natural for people to talk about this. I like hearing about what life was like for people in Tibet, or Myanmar, Eritrea, Cook Islands etc. I don't think it carries the same level of racist connotations as it used to. How are we supposed to have cultural exchange if we can't talk about our backgrounds?___
It's just a standard office getting to know you small talk thing. You'll get used to it.
FYI, they were looking for you to actually talk and engage with them, not a one word answer. Tell them what part of Canada, that your family was part of the Canada-US wars and locked the US's. And most importantly, ask them something in return...
Skating it once might be standard. But asking where the grandparents are from is kind of strange
Maybe, but they were probably thrown off or annoyed by his weird one word answer. Replying "Canada" when you're in Canada is just strange.
Yea but where are u from?
After the second time you should just respond "don't overthink it"
I've watched a lot of Canadian TV and worked with a lot of Canadians and the Newfy accent is pretty distinct, even in Canada. If you've just got a touch of it you might sound vaguely Irish or Scottish. That would explain why people are asking where you're from.
I have a long time friend who complains about this kind of behavior. Friend is a Creek Indian living in the Muskogee Creek Nation in Oklahoma. That's about as native-born and indigenous as you can get.
Unfortunately, her skin is somewhat less than lily-white, and that just seems to bring out the dumbasses.
I'm swedish and living in France and I get that question a lot (but not about my parents/grandparents wtf?)
If cute girl: you have to guess! Then get very fake outraged if she says Germany etc. Friendly banter ensues.
Otherwise it's just people who want to chit chat with you so just roll with it and expect the classic jokes (for me it's IKEA, Volvo, surströmming...).
Why are you asking us instead of them? Surely they would know.
Anyone who’s asked you four times where you’re from is not paying attention.
I would imagine they're trying to ask what someone's ethnicity is but forgot the word for it.
I get asked this a lot, because my accent is dissimilar from the area I live now. I think if people were more familiar with the area I'm from, they'd ask where my parents are from because my accent and terms are a weird mix of the two places.
Newfoundland has a very particular accent, do you speak with a strong accent?
A loosely moderated place to ask open-ended questions
If your post meets the following criteria, it's welcome here!
Looking for support?
Looking for a community?
~Icon~ ~by~ ~@Double_A@discuss.tchncs.de~