595
Selfish! (lemmy.world)
submitted 1 month ago by Exusia@lemmy.world to c/memes@lemmy.world
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[-] Darkassassin07@lemmy.ca 35 points 1 month ago

There's a simple solution to make everyone happy:

[-] TheTechnician27@lemmy.world 32 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

>99.7% corn syrup

>0.3% sunny

>May contain trace amounts of D

[-] Ephera@lemmy.ml 17 points 1 month ago

You must've misread that, it says "100% Vitamin C" right on the packaging.

It's pure ascorbic acid.

[-] Doombot1@lemmy.one 6 points 1 month ago

If you cut the O in corn syrup in half you get 2 uppercase D’s, therefore, it’s actually 199.4% D. Checkmate

[-] ShinkanTrain@lemmy.ml 3 points 1 month ago

Just like me fr

[-] shadowedcross@sh.itjust.works 21 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

They should take vitamin D supplements like the rest of us shut-ins.

[-] nondescripthandle@lemmy.dbzer0.com 20 points 1 month ago

Dumbass vampires, I dont go out in the sun either, now we both don't have enough vitamin D.

[-] sun_is_ra@sh.itjust.works 14 points 1 month ago

There is milk in supermarkets enriched with Vitamin D. Good news for all vampires out their nd for their potential future victims

[-] queermunist@lemmy.ml 12 points 1 month ago

That's why you don't hear about vampire attacks anymore.

[-] pseudo@jlai.lu 4 points 1 month ago

That's a very nice start for a book.

[-] queermunist@lemmy.ml -1 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

There's a supernatural masquerade, with vampires and witches and werewolves living among us, and all sorts of mundane regulations are just their influence on the government.

You think fluoride in our water supply is for our teeth? Bah! It's a vital mineral nutrient for the goblins and dwarves from the Underdark. They have a treaty with the surface governments to allow them to easily adjust.

[-] pseudo@jlai.lu 1 points 1 month ago

Do you post your ficction somewhere on the fediverse? I would like to read what come next.

[-] queermunist@lemmy.ml 0 points 1 month ago

I wish I had the patience to write! I just read a lot of amateur stuff on ArchiveOfOurOwn and this seems like something I'd find there.

[-] GBU_28@lemm.ee 4 points 1 month ago

Since when can vampires consume food/drink

[-] whotookkarl@lemmy.world 2 points 1 month ago

They seem okay with at least one animal fluid, maybe they can handle other animal fluids?

[-] PeriodicallyPedantic@lemmy.ca 1 points 1 month ago

I believe that since at least the late 1800s with the prototype of the modern vampire, the novel Dracula described vampires eating solid food.
Granted it was mostly done by a crazy vampire, but he didn't seem the bare any I'll effects for the effort.

[-] felykiosa@sh.itjust.works 10 points 1 month ago
[-] skulblaka@sh.itjust.works 2 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)
[-] RVGamer06@sh.itjust.works 2 points 1 month ago

Thank you, i just discovered another fantasy world i had no idea it existed

[-] felykiosa@sh.itjust.works 1 points 1 month ago

To be fair I was specifically talking about Nazuna

[-] Sparky@lemmy.blahaj.zone 8 points 1 month ago

You know vitamin D suppliments are a thing right?

[-] some_guy@lemmy.sdf.org 7 points 1 month ago

I now realize that banishing garlic from my home is an important public service for the needy.

[-] Kolanaki@yiffit.net 5 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

They could just eat vegetables and drink more whole milk, the bastards. That's how I get vitamin D without going outside.

[-] PeriodicallyPedantic@lemmy.ca 4 points 1 month ago

The "vampires can't go in the sun" is such a boring trope. I hate Nosferatu for introducing it.
Dracula (not the OG vampire, but the prototype for modern vampires) could go into the sun just fine, it just suppressed their supernatural abilities. That's way more interesting

[-] daniskarma@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 1 month ago

Carmilla just liked to get up late. Because she was up all night doing her vampire things.

[-] Flocklesscrow@lemm.ee 1 points 1 month ago

And he was shimmering and sparkly?

[-] PeriodicallyPedantic@lemmy.ca 2 points 1 month ago

🤣

But just in case anyone wants a serious answer: no, they're indistinguishable from a regular human on land. Can't swim tho (deep water kills them or something? I forget exactly).

[-] kittenzrulz123@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 points 1 month ago

Why does it have to be human blood? Why not cow blood or chicken blood?

[-] GrammarPolice@lemmy.world 1 points 1 month ago
[-] kittenzrulz123@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 1 month ago

I dont think human blood is vegan, neither is a lot of vitamin d supplements

[-] bradbeattie@lemmy.ca 2 points 1 month ago

Depends on how you get it. Consenting adults donating their own they can afford to lose? Vegan. Caged up toddlers that can't consent? Not vegan.

[-] Godric@lemmy.world 1 points 1 month ago
this post was submitted on 08 Oct 2024
595 points (99.0% liked)

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