I believe that Ronald may be made of asbestos
That's funny cuz he tastes like lead paint
He clearly started the fire
Maybe. All I know is that Billy Joel and his crew didn't.
Unrelated to the post, but there's an updated version of that song from Fall Out Boy: https://youtu.be/2LkVKCWL0U4
Fair warning: nobody asked for it and nobody should listen to it. It's terrible.
I don't think it's terrible.
I mean I figured that out when they said Fall Out Boy.
Plus, why would listen to that version when The Hoff did a version? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IoRUe9xXin4 (It is also awful, but I mean that's obvious. It's David Hasselhoff.)
Fall Out Boy slander will not be tolerated
I speak only in great truths.
One of those truths is that two string quartets have thought it was a good idea to cover that song.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=djULDN0aubM
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yD9BaPsHwEc
The correct number, incidentally, is zero string quartets.
Not the biggest fan of the Fall Out Boy cover, but everyone here that wasn't alive when the original came out is doing themselves a disservice by not listening.
The lyrics have been updated, it's not a cover. Hearing Trump's name in the same song that mentions MySpace and Sandy Hook has got to be the same level of cultural whiplash as Billy Joel mentioning "Wheel of Fortune," Watergate, Joseph Stalin, and "Stranger in a Strange Land." Except it really hits home, because those of us that weren't adults when the original came out recognize and have memories of almost everything in the song, just like Billy Joel intended.
Why do some folks have a [+1] after their names?
I'm an elder millennial and I remember thinking there was a very real possibility that Ronald would be in MY McDonald's at least ONCE when I went there. I thought about that when I was a kid too.
I remember when I was a kid in the 80s, some McDonald's had a yellow phone which you could pick up and "talk to Ronald." I was terrified of the idea.
lol I was a kid then too and I’ve never heard of this. What kind of shit would he say? Was it just a line to the managers office? And what kind of things did the kids say to him? It’s like some kind of help line “My parents beat me and make me wear long sleeves in the summer.”
Or more likely it was just some stupid recording.
I'm sure it was just a recording, but I was terrified of the idea that you could pick up a phone and talk to Ronald. And I wasn't a kid who was afraid of clowns or anything.
It doesn't help that it looks creepy as fuck.
I worked at McDonald's and they had an official Ronald actor visit once, so it could happen.
"Mac and Me" propaganda works!
The god of hell fire himself. I'd watch the series.
I think you could get a five episode miniseries with an epic arc where Ronald, God of Fire takes humanoid form and finally accepts his sexuality.
The hell is that statue made of that it doesn't even have soot on it?
The same stuff that stops their burgers and fries from ever decomposing, I guess. PFAS?
Our Ronald in McHeaven Hallowed be thy fries
Thy kingdom come, burgers well done,
"We clown in this mf. Take yo sensitive ass back to hell!" — Ronald McDonald, 2025 EIEIO
Turns fire into fried hamburgers!
You'll be safe under his golden arches
Now everybody’s down at McDonalds, they’re down with Ronald McDonald, and now they’re hitting the bottle and everybody cool.
"You're gonna be flame-grilled Anakin..."
6 hours before: "This is fine"
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