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[-] RNAi@hexbear.net 69 points 2 months ago

2.5 centimeters of toothpaste is like a lot, the dude is foaming like crazy

[-] hellinkilla@hexbear.net 44 points 2 months ago

Just raises questions about the toothbrush.

[-] poster596@hexbear.net 30 points 2 months ago

Maybe seizing the toothbrushes will be necessary after all.

reach-right stalin-gun-2

[-] Rey_McSriff@hexbear.net 36 points 2 months ago

As much as I'd love to believe this screenshot of uncredited text, this is how I knew it was all fake. No British person cares that much about brushing their teeth

[-] BanMeFromPosting@hexbear.net 45 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

There's interviews with his butler where the butler talks about the toothpaste and also being called into his office in order to throw out one piece of paper into a paperbasket next to the desk.
Skepticism is only worth anything if you follow it up with research and this shit is pretty easy to look into. https://www.cosmopolitan.com/uk/reports/a38743898/prince-charles-doesnt-squeeze-out-his-own-toothpaste/

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[-] Llituro@hexbear.net 52 points 2 months ago

custom velvet toilet paper

pause. wtf does that even mean? is he wiping his ass with fucking fabric? is he just regularly annihilating plumbing everywhere he shits or something? i don't understand.

[-] FlakesBongler@hexbear.net 44 points 2 months ago

Probably extra soft toilet paper kept away from us because if we knew there more than one kind of softness, we'd never stop killing for it

[-] supdawg813@hexbear.net 41 points 2 months ago

Kinda misleading, Kleenex Velvet is the brand name and it's not sold in some countries so he has to travel with it

[-] Llituro@hexbear.net 22 points 2 months ago
[-] ZWQbpkzl@hexbear.net 19 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Kleenex is basically synonymous with tissue paper in the US but I've never heard of them selling toilet paper before. Cottenelle is the TP brand from Kimberly-Clark in the US.

[-] Damarcusart@hexbear.net 15 points 2 months ago

Really? Over here (Aus) they're known for both. There is a Kleenex product for every orifice!

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[-] fox@hexbear.net 28 points 2 months ago

He's got a dude whose job it is to emboss the royal monogram on every square of what's otherwise just Charmin 2 ply.

[-] Wertheimer@hexbear.net 20 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

They call him the ~~Lord of the Privy Chamber~~

Edit - Even better! A Groom of the Stool

[-] NewOldGuard@lemmy.ml 15 points 2 months ago

Heneage and Denny, as servants "whom he used secretly about him", were privy to Henry VIII's most intimate confidences about Anne of Cleves. He told them he doubted her virginity, on account of "her brests so slacke".

Why is this so funny to me, wtf are you on about Henry

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[-] TheLastHero@hexbear.net 17 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

must have servants to launder the royal shit rags, what decadence

[-] BanMeFromPosting@hexbear.net 48 points 2 months ago

look at my divinely appointed ruler dawg I'm going to starve

Sick fit

[-] krolden@lemmy.ml 29 points 2 months ago
[-] Llituro@hexbear.net 30 points 2 months ago

imagine trying to explain to any indigenous group on turtle island or in africa that the soulless mayoids that are about to invade, genocide, and enslave them are exclusively ruled by petulant children wearing silly clothes and wigs and funny hats.

[-] BanMeFromPosting@hexbear.net 21 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

There is actually a tribe in the Amazon that considers him some sort of god of fertility. There's a docuseries about it.

Edit: googled it and found the cargo cult "the prince Philip movement". Probably the ones I was thinking of, so not a tribe but a part of one.

[-] Horse@lemmygrad.ml 14 points 2 months ago

that was his dad, i wonder what they're up to now the old lich is dead

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[-] ZWQbpkzl@hexbear.net 17 points 2 months ago

Sometimes I have a fantasy of becoming POTUS and demanding the UK giving me the crown jewels as an act of fealty. Then I leverage the jewels to sweeten some trade deal with India. It usually ends with me holding up the hope diamond that shines across a cricket stadium as I yell the hindi equivalent of "Ich bin ein Berliner".

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[-] hellinkilla@hexbear.net 17 points 2 months ago

I think my mom had the same purple dress when she was pregnant.

[-] FALGSConaut@hexbear.net 16 points 2 months ago

Why does her hat look photoshopped?

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[-] jackmaoist@hexbear.net 47 points 2 months ago

Charles is inbred right? This is the kind of shit inbred monarchs have always done.

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[-] LENINSGHOSTFACEKILLA@hexbear.net 42 points 2 months ago

alright am i alone in thinking the 2.5 centimeters is the weirdest part? not even the butler, the SHEER AMOUNT OF TOOTHPASTE

[-] Liketearsinrain@lemmy.ml 21 points 2 months ago

wait, this isn't a joke post?

[-] baguettefish@discuss.tchncs.de 32 points 2 months ago

you made me doubt it and i looked and yes, he really does want these things. the toothpaste centimeter thing is because he wants exactly an inch of toothpaste out of a crested silver dispenser, which translates to 2.54cm. the claims come from Omid Scobie's book "Endgame: Inside the Royal Family and the Monarchy’s Fight For Survival"

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[-] Lowleekun@hexbear.net 42 points 2 months ago

Imagine beging a monarchist. Peroid.

Pretty cringe.

[-] came_apart_at_Kmart@hexbear.net 37 points 2 months ago

i don't think the monarchy is gonna make it. queen elizabeth lived so damn long from ww2 to now-ish. i can imagine a certain amount of inertia for legitimacy when the monarch is some ancient little old lady in pastel colors with corgis.

but suddenly, the new monarch is this fuckin' inbred guy who has been a public doofus since always. that has got to move the needle to where more people are like, "wait, how much is wasted on this asshole?"

[-] red_giant@hexbear.net 15 points 2 months ago

but suddenly, the new monarch is this fuckin' inbred guy

guy who is completely unfamiliar with monarchy

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[-] theuniqueone@lemmy.dbzer0.com 33 points 2 months ago

Like that this comments section isn't filled with his defenders claiming this extreme privilege is just undiagnosed autism and criticizing it is ableism like I've seen when this is posted elsewhere.

[-] GalaxyBrain@hexbear.net 31 points 2 months ago

I think that's more insulting to autistic people than making fun of a Prince for being a spoiled adult brat who throws temper tantrums. Autistic people arent that demanding and if someone was, they would still need to be rich and privileged enough to make those impositions

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[-] ephemeral@hexbear.net 20 points 2 months ago

lmao that's incredible. I love when people use woke talking points to defend the most reactionary people on the planet, it's genuinely hilarious

[-] space_comrade@hexbear.net 19 points 2 months ago
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[-] BeanisBrain@hexbear.net 33 points 2 months ago

I myself have a plush isopod and that's never impacted my work but the rest is ridiculous

[-] GalaxyBrain@hexbear.net 19 points 2 months ago

If i could afford Royalty Level toilet paper I'd probably take it with me as well. Probably hard to go back

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[-] kleeon@hexbear.net 31 points 2 months ago

None of this is surprising. Royals were always weird neurotic pussies

[-] mayo_cider@hexbear.net 29 points 2 months ago

You don't understand, he forced the media to use the full government name instead of "prince Andrew"

[-] godlessworm@hexbear.net 20 points 2 months ago

nice i hope his life sucks til he dies

[-] SorosFootSoldier@hexbear.net 19 points 2 months ago

...

Brother, you need your butler to put toothpaste on the brush? That isn't being pampered, that's being LAZY. And I should know since I'm a lazy guy myself, c'mon man!

[-] anotherspinelessdem@lemmy.ml 20 points 2 months ago

It's giving Pŭyí, as the youth say these days

[-] UmbraVivi@hexbear.net 19 points 2 months ago

sometimes i wonder just how insufferable i would be had i grown up in the royal family

[-] GrouchyGrouse@hexbear.net 17 points 2 months ago

We need an emoji of the baby from Dinosaurs

jaby-vance this guy ain’t cutting it

[-] TheSpectreOfGay@hexbear.net 15 points 2 months ago

read monarchist as masochist at first and didn't even blink

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this post was submitted on 20 Feb 2026
203 points (99.5% liked)

Chapotraphouse

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