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[-] Kraven_the_Hunter@lemmy.dbzer0.com 102 points 1 year ago

Where are all of the good toddlers with guns when you need them??

[-] TheEEEdiot@sh.itjust.works 10 points 1 year ago
[-] pineapplelover@lemm.ee 4 points 1 year ago

Funny and very disappointing at the same time how he got actual politicians to endorse training for 4 year olds to shoot bad guys.

[-] eager_eagle@lemmy.world 99 points 1 year ago

guns don't kill people, toddlers do

[-] WhiskyTangoFoxtrot@lemmy.world 29 points 1 year ago

It takes a child to raze a village.

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[-] Trainguyrom@reddthat.com 9 points 1 year ago

As someone with 2 preschool aged kids I absolutely agree

[-] ThrowawaySobriquet@lemmy.world 97 points 1 year ago

Jesus Fucking Christ! Someone do something about that toddler!

[-] lolrightythen@lemmy.world 15 points 1 year ago

That's what the toddler wants.

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[-] Iron_Lynx@lemmy.world 59 points 1 year ago

Every sixty seconds, a woman in Britain gives birth. She. Must. Be. Exhausted.

[-] Semi_Hemi_Demigod@lemmy.world 10 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Why would she be exhausted when she has the machine that goes PING! After all it's the doctors who do all the work since they're the experts.

[-] username_unavailable@lemmy.world 42 points 1 year ago

Imagine what he's going to be like when he hits his rebellious years.

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[-] 0ops@lemm.ee 35 points 1 year ago

He probably doesn't remain that large, he is a toddler

[-] general_kitten@sopuli.xyz 7 points 1 year ago

He remains at small but growing rapidly

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[-] some_guy@lemmy.sdf.org 33 points 1 year ago

Just stop selling the kid ammo. Problem solved.

[-] dumbass@leminal.space 23 points 1 year ago

You say no to that cute little face!

[-] OrgunDonor@lemmy.world 14 points 1 year ago

I would easily say no to his face... but he has a guna nd is willing to use it.

[-] FrostyTheDoo@lemmy.world 3 points 1 year ago

He only uses it once a week though, so just catch him after his weekly kill

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[-] Semi_Hemi_Demigod@lemmy.world 7 points 1 year ago

All I'm saying is that if bullets cost $5,000 I bet that toddler would have a hard time affording them

[-] rickdg@lemmy.world 25 points 1 year ago

The solution for a toddler with a gun is an adult with a gun. Or something. Idk, I'm not american.

[-] tacosplease@lemmy.world 9 points 1 year ago

You've got the spirit though

[-] Thcdenton@lemmy.world 25 points 1 year ago
[-] BudgetBandit@sh.itjust.works 22 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

According to my quick search, it should be Not more than 5 years into the deaths by gun-wielding toddler surpass the deaths of 9/11.

Edit: I was wrong. Here are the fruits of my research:

Toddlers: about 21 deaths per year, would take until 2142 to surpass the 9/11 deaths

Kids 12 and below: 40 deaths per year, would take until 2075 to surpass those deaths

Children 17 and below, when counting accidents only, would take until 2029

[-] Viking_Hippie@lemmy.world 11 points 1 year ago

Toddlers: about 21 deaths per year

Last I checked, there was more weeks than that in a year. Did those fuckers in HR go and change it?

[-] NikkiDimes@lemmy.world 13 points 1 year ago
[-] Viking_Hippie@lemmy.world 11 points 1 year ago

Ah ok, fair enough.

Now that you mention it, it was pretty silly to expect the toddler to have a 100% kill rate lol

[-] IzzyScissor@lemmy.world 19 points 1 year ago
[-] moon@lemmy.cafe 15 points 1 year ago

Glad to see their aim got better

[-] Samsy@lemmy.ml 16 points 1 year ago

Lil John Wick is on a mission, I guess.

[-] TastyWheat@lemmy.world 7 points 1 year ago

Adam Sandler in: Lil' Wicky

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[-] psycho_driver@lemmy.world 14 points 1 year ago

I look forward to his adolescence as a Fortune 500 CEO.

[-] spujb@lemmy.cafe 11 points 1 year ago

this joke is funny here but it gets really sad when twitter and everyone repeats the same “original” knee slapper when this stat continues to be true, month after month after month 😒

[-] Iapar@feddit.de 16 points 1 year ago

I used to be an kneeslapper like them. Then I got shot by a toddler.

[-] fossphi@lemm.ee 3 points 1 year ago

Right in the knee?

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[-] Kolanaki@yiffit.net 9 points 1 year ago

That Dennis is such a meanance.

[-] boatsnhos931@lemmy.world 7 points 1 year ago

Toddler army UNITE

[-] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 6 points 1 year ago

Why don't Americans simply not have a larger toddler eat this trigger happy rugrat?

[-] ILikeBoobies@lemmy.ca 5 points 1 year ago

Whoever said taking candy from a baby was easy must not have been American

[-] Xtallll@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 points 1 year ago

After 2 years are they still a toddler?

[-] Viking_Hippie@lemmy.world 5 points 1 year ago

Talk about the Terrible Twos!

[-] postmateDumbass@lemmy.world 5 points 1 year ago

They will grow out of it.

[-] slaacaa@lemmy.world 4 points 1 year ago

Not a very good accuracy, shooting ranges need to offer child discounts, so they could practice more

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this post was submitted on 25 Jun 2024
782 points (99.2% liked)

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