Metal Gear Rising really is the funniest one on this list. The game's main antagonist is Dick Cheney with nanomachines who verbatim says he wants to "Make America Great Again" a full two years before the Trump campaign starts. You kill an insane amount of cops. One of the bosses, who is shown to be nothing more than a psychopath who enjoys war, wants the world to go back to "the good old days after 9/11" when arms manufacturers could do anything they wanted. It portrays a world where war is nothing but a vehicle for profit, and the main characters realises he wants nothing to do with this, leaves his PMC outfit, and fights for himself against these evil corporations. It's not subtle, in the slightest. I have no idea how you can read this game as conservative.

essential commiecore:

• spider solitaire
• harvest moon ds
• purble place
• morphman
• hyrule warriors definitive edition
• battle tetris
• bloons tower defence 5
• banjo-kazooie: grunty's revenge
• hotel dusk
• cartoon network's summer resort, episode 3

Darktide

DoA Xtreme

Nobody ever actually played those

Fallout 3, CoD4, and MGRR

The bad guys are literally the US government lmao

These games are all either a handful of explicitly NOT conservative games, military shooters, a couple games that sexualize women, and then just "games I like".

DoA: Xtreme Beach Volleyball

Zelda OOC

Fuck offfffffff

Can you really call this the "conservative essentials" without gems like Custer's Revenge and Hatred?

The basic rimworld colony is basically anarcho communist, what the hell.

Ah yes, Silent Hill 3, where you play as a woman and perform an abortion on a god, where all the religious people are depicted as murderous lunatics and the most powerful deity in the game is a disabled woman.

The funniest part is that the original tweet that triggered the chud was this

transcore chart

ocarina of time

Are they not offended by Sheik?

These games are really old.

I would say a third of those games make sense.

Anything WW2, Shooters, and anything 40K related would be my assumptions. I would also throw in Madden. Top of the chud pile would be Call of Duty.

Oddly enough BioShock still has Ayn Rand fans despite the story. Naturally they can't understand that it is a deconstruction of Ayn Rand. They also say the only reason Rapture failed was because Ryan abandoned his ideals...

HE DID BECAUSE HE FUCKING HAD TO BECAUSE HE WAS LOSING UNDER HIS IDEALS. That is the entire point of that story. It's a self contradicting society.

They forgot Hogwarts

but you kill Nazis in Sniper Elite and we've all seen that Republicans won't even denounce Nazis, let alone kill them.

What sort of fucked up reading of Silent Hill 3 do you have to have to make it a conservative game?

So I just checked the source, and I think this person is serious

Parasite Eve is the funniest one on there.

Mitochondria are definitely fascist.

Did they play Persona 4 and pick the wrong suspect at the end? That game is not sympathetic to their ideology lmao.

As you can see, Doom II isn't on the list because you can shoot Nazis in that game.